[MartynRich]

Hi all

Time for another one of mine. It is very different again to what has gone before. I would also really appreciate feedback on the production because this track came about in a slightly strange way. I found the basics of the backing track as an MP3 file, but for the life of me have been unable to locate the original Logic file. So this is what has built up out of bass, synth, percussion and electric guitar and I am still wondering whether to re-record it or not. I guess this is me at my most experimental but I have still tried to make the chorus memorable...

https://soundcloud.com/martynstanding/somewhere-in-the-city

Somewhere In The City

You´ve been fooled by a Jekyll and Hyde

She´s in my way
This summer day
I cannot believe how we seem to blow away

You cant decide
When you want to cry
It´s not too late
To see the other side

She wrote a postcard
On the screen
She saved on postage but
Couldn´t seem to breathe
It´s not so easy
When there´s nothing left to say

So she said

Somewhere in the City
There´s a mirror with your name on

Gonna shine a light, on these reflections
Gonna shine a light on these reflections

Somewhere in the City
There´s a mirror with your name on

Dig around, dig around
Dig as deep as you can
Don´t be fooled by your very own Jekyll and Hyde

[pompeyjazz]

Hi Martyn. Well I was going to leave my review until tomorrow but this is effin excellent. Loved the passionate vocals and the earworm bass. Had to rewind a couple of times to where the bass drops in. Extremely clever stuff 

[tina m]

I have to say most of this is realy delicious ...i loved its sort of experimental nature & the way snippets of instruments pop in & do a turn & then exit the stage for the next performer & theres just  loads of ideas crammed in which is something I always love to hear & i realy liked the different vocal parts from whispers to croons  
the first 45 seconds of this was pretty sublime ..but...the chorus just didnt work to my ears ..  the melody notes often jarred with  the  chords.. ..now im thinking that must have been intentional but I didnt think it sounded good...its funny bcos you describe it as a catchy chorus
I loved the backwards guitar... the ringing acoustic lead bits  & id love to have  that fuzzed out guitar sound in my fx box!
im sorry to be a bit negative

[MartynRich]

John - thank you!

Tina - That´s not negative, it´s quite overwhemingly positive. If you calling something delicious is negative I´d hate to see you being complimentary. At least you didn´t touch my lyrics  

However, it would be good if you could think exactly why it jars...some people love that chorus so your opinion is valued. I know when I listened to the individual tracks yesterday, with a view to remixing, the chorus vocal lines were very harsh (they have a slight distorted effect), whereas the rest of the production is quite smooth. I was thinking they could be re-sung, with a softer production and delivery. Any thoughts you have are very much welcomed.

[tina m]

martyn i heard discord in the chorus or is it called dissonance
ive never heard that used in a 'catchy chorus'
thats all i can say realy but if no one else hears it then it must be just something i wouldnt use
i liked the lyrics... i often imagine a movie from the lyrics as i hear them with the music...
this one made me want to look for it on netflix 

[MartynRich]

Ok that's great to know. I do think the melody in the chorus could do with floating a bit more on top of the background. Maybe it is just a bit flat. I've also double-tracked an octave harmony which may not be helping.

[Movin Flavour]

This is great experimentation..... This song has lots of energy and lots of hope , I love the mellow beginning and the different passages in the song.

Sandeep

[Skub]

I understand what tinam is hearing in the chorus and I think there may be a couple of factors at work,Martyn. Firstly I think you are right about some of the chorus phrases being 'pitchy'. The other thing is the discord between the bass line played by the synth and the sung notes of the chorus. It's fine if you are going for a sinister sort of effect,but it doesn't work as a catchy hook. Even if you decide to keep the sinister option,you'll still need to fix the pitch of the vocals. You can hear it quite plainly around 2.08 on 'city'.

I'm sorry if all that appears negative Martyn,because overall the piece is bursting with creativity,it would be a shame not to fix the little things.

[MartynRich]

This is exactly what I was talking about in the other thread. You have to be able to take constructive feedback if you want to get this stuff right. Now you can all sod off 

To be honest I think it just isn't sung right. The bass notes are a fairly standard chord sequence and I think it's a case of fine-tuning the melody.

[Skub]

 

[Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra]

Great start...sets it up nicely.

Cool track Martyn. Just to enter the chorus debate....it is a catchy chorus...gets catchier every listen all right...I think that it may be some of the harmony vocal or whatever you call it. It's a very exposed vocal so either something more (tasteful) behind it to blend in a bit or experiment with the vocal bit again.

It's an unusual, richly creative track with a lot of appeal. very catchy all of it and a great chorus idea.

Nice one.

[delb0y]

This is a grower! When it opened I thought yes... this is sinister and interesting...but I'm not sure if it's my thing...but once the chorus kicked in (and kept kicking in) I was hooked. Now the mirror with my name on is bouncing round my brain! And backwards guitars are always a plus. I did pick up on a coupe of moments where the vocals may not have gelled quite right, and better ears than mine have suggested this might be pitchy or not in harmony with the bass and keyboards. I don't know - God knows I'm not one to be able to offer advice in such areas (if I'm within 12 notes of the intended target I'm delighted) but the song definitely warrants checking that out because it sure is catchy! Off for another listen now.

Derek

[digger72]

Hi Martyn,

Totally love this. Great track. Great atmosphere.
The different sounds work very well. The reverse guitar is a nice addition.
I think the chorus is brill. Simple but very effective - just drives into your head.

I wouldn't change a thing.

Digger

[MartynRich]

Hi Martyn,

Totally love this. Great track. Great atmosphere.
The different sounds work very well. The reverse guitar is a nice addition.
I think the chorus is brill. Simple but very effective - just drives into your head.

I wouldn't change a thing.

Digger

Thanks Digger. It is too late now though, I am already selling off my gear. Seriously I appreciate the praise and I am glad you like it. I will look at the chorus again though as I think what people are referring to is the bass vocal and one or two off pitch bits, but I can fix those.

Great start...sets it up nicely.

Cool track Martyn. Just to enter the chorus debate....it is a catchy chorus...gets catchier every listen all right...I think that it may be some of the harmony vocal or whatever you call it. It's a very exposed vocal so either something more (tasteful) behind it to blend in a bit or experiment with the vocal bit again.

It's an unusual, richly creative track with a lot of appeal. very catchy all of it and a great chorus idea.

Nice one.

Thanks Viscount, very good suggestions and very much appreciated!

This is a grower! When it opened I thought yes... this is sinister and interesting...but I'm not sure if it's my thing...but once the chorus kicked in (and kept kicking in) I was hooked. Now the mirror with my name on is bouncing round my brain! And backwards guitars are always a plus. I did pick up on a coupe of moments where the vocals may not have gelled quite right, and better ears than mine have suggested this might be pitchy or not in harmony with the bass and keyboards. I don't know - God knows I'm not one to be able to offer advice in such areas (if I'm within 12 notes of the intended target I'm delighted) but the song definitely warrants checking that out because it sure is catchy! Off for another listen now.

Derek

That is the best praise you can get, if its stuck in your brain then its worked....hope you don't find it annoying after a while. I still have Mark of the Chains and Damn This Field in my head most days...

[IronKnee]

Hey there Marty......Very strong and engaging atmosphere that is reminiscent of the late great, Prince 
Love the sound....love the writing. great performances.
Another great tune!
                                           -Tom