The Prize

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laurabh

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« on: July 01, 2013, 09:04:42 PM »
This is my first write in a very long time, a lot has gone on in my life throughout the past year, and things have changed, and through all this my perceptions on life in general have also changed, I wrote this song because its something I've realised lately, watching people, watching life go by, it really hits home. I wrote this with the intention of a Passenger/Ed Sheeran/Acoustic type vibe to it...
I hope it hits home with others too, and any feedback would be much appreciated :)

 VERSE 1:
Since they were young,
They've been pushed along,
To achieve, succeed,
Acceptance from the family,
The 'so called' society,
Chasing this fulfillment,
That prize that’s supposed to come,
With time.

PRE-CHORUS
We've all been climbing up,
This ladder, each crooked rung
Getting us closer,
To this,
Shiny,
Amazing,
Grade,
This fabulous,
Degree,
This reliable,
Career,
This promotion,
To be won,
That girl,
To be married,
The house you’ll,
Name,
Home.

CHORUS
'Cause they’re always running,
They don’t want to stop,
Always running,
But they’re,
Never moving from the spot.
Always running,
Then the penny drops,
When the race is over,
They realise what they,
Missed,
Lost and forgot.

VERSE 2:
When they got old,
They looked back on the things that had gone,
The time, the life,
The shining sun,
The memories,
Growing up,
All while they were chasing,
That prize that’s supposed to come,
Wasting time.

PRE-CHORUS

CHORUS

BRIDGE:
Chasing,
Chasing things,
Never stopping to look,
To breathe, to dance, to play, to sing along…
Chasing,
Chasing things,
When the prize arrives,
And the price was life,
It doesn't seem worth it,
Not at all…

(Instrumental)

CHORUS X2

FINAL CHORUS
(Acapella)

Always running,
They don’t want to stop,
Always running,
But they’re,
Never moving from the spot.
Always running,
Then the penny drops,
When the race is over,
They realise that the person they think they are,
They’re not.










« Last Edit: July 01, 2013, 09:26:22 PM by laurabh »

BooBoo

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« Reply #1 on: July 01, 2013, 09:10:48 PM »
Hey Laura, nice to see you writing again ;) I really love the pre chorus on this. Looks long but I imagined it to be sung quite fast, the way Ed Sheeran raps in his songs. I love the while theme of the song! You really should find more time to write as you're really good at it!
VOTE FOR JUNE LOTM!!!!!!!

GTB

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« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2013, 12:48:41 AM »
Hi Laurabh,
this is simply brilliant, I love it.  The structure looks unusual and interesting and though it may be a bit long it could be an illusion with all those short lines, look forward to hearing it.  I really hope you will be posting it with music at some point.
best line for me is "crooked rungs" - absolutely inspired!  and the ending is so well phrased too.
I tried but I can't find a single criticism of this piece, I'm impressed
GTB
GTB

laurabh

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« Reply #3 on: July 02, 2013, 11:59:37 AM »
Thanks guys,
I'm glad you can see where I was going with this, and the comments are much appreciated! I realise the structure looks pretty long and confusing based soley on the lyrics, but the short lines were a reflection of the speed, kina 'Mumford and Sons' style, or in the way Ed Sheeran raps, like BooBoo said. I'm definitely looking to put some music to this, I'm not exactly 'musically talented' but I've been playing around with a lot of production software lately, so that and some basic riffs/chords might do the lyrics some justice!

tayoln

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« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2013, 02:50:48 PM »
Love the chorus on this!

Singing along to it and I don't even know what it sounds like!

Jess

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« Reply #5 on: July 02, 2013, 04:09:56 PM »
I really liked this and when I saw the Mumford and sons, ed Sheeran vibe you were going for, I liked it even more. That prechorus is so unique and memorable, I also love the last few lines of the bridge, but the whole song is superb. I think you have a really nice, original writing style :)
"When writing a song, if your afraid to suck, you'll never write a note" -Jeff Boyle

benjo

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« Reply #6 on: July 02, 2013, 06:52:15 PM »
hi laurabh,

i could almost sense how you felt as you were writing this
same as what's already been said really,    BUT WOW WHAT AN ENDING tony...

Always running,
They don’t want to stop,
Always running,
But they’re,
Never moving from the spot.
Always running,
Then the penny drops,
When the race is over,
They realise that the person they think they are,
They’re not.

Kevin j

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« Reply #7 on: July 03, 2013, 03:43:25 PM »
loved it! htought the lyrics were great, got a real acoustic feeling to it
hope you can think of a nic melody to go with it, id love to hear what it sounds like :)
well, that escalated quickly..
-Anchorman :)

laurabh

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« Reply #8 on: July 04, 2013, 05:09:20 PM »
Thanks! I'm definitely hoping to get some music to it asap!

S.T.C

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« Reply #9 on: July 04, 2013, 05:30:43 PM »
I think youv`e done a good job here..i can see the idea your after.

Lyrycalsoulz

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« Reply #10 on: July 06, 2013, 02:36:57 AM »
Awesome chorus I have to see.. I was singing it to my own melody as I was readin it quite naturally.. a sign for me that it is really a solid original track :)

Would love to hear this to music and vocals

Again I liked the chorus the most out of the whole song
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