[shortwhat]

Okay so this might be controversial I'm not sure.. It's about Christianity in the media etc. The structure in the lines may seem a little off, but I've worked it around my voice so it's okay on that front, it's also quite long, but it's a punk song so it'd be played quite fast and going through it it's about 4 minutes long.

Scorn Or Shame:

V1
They’ve got my head again
The distress signal won’t seem to send
Let’s release another bulletin
Infect our peers like a deadly pathogen

I took my vitamins
But I’ve got another deficit
I’ll cover up with bandages
But I’m choking on the medicine

I'm lying to all my friends

CHORUS
You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

V2
What if mother Mary had a one night stand?
And we’re all shipwrecked and laying on the sand
We are a machine that you left unmanned
Tearing down whatever haven you have found

All the surfers caught the tidal wave
With broken boards they’re all screaming to be saved
They hired the feds to investigate
Found a suicide note signed with our saviour’s name

They’re searching for a culprit or just someone they can blame

CHORUS
You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

V3
Tell mother and father to pour the wine
The priest will tell the daughter it’s time to say goodbye
He kept a death grip on his disguise
As he thanked them for their patience and their time

Said you got hands to pray and knees to kneel
And god will tell you just how you should feel
Just say your thanks before every meal
And tell all your neighbours that he’s out there and he’s real

Your faith will be mine to steal

CHORUS
You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

V4
I’ve got these voices in my head
I think I’ll just ignore them and talk to you instead
All the colours blur until we just see red
Everybody we looked up to is in prison or dead

CHORUS
You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

You’re running and I’m coming too
If you’re running then I’m coming with you
If you’re running then I’m coming too
Because they’d tear me apart

[Arkwright]

Not sure why this hasn't received any comments, maybe it's the subject matter as religion is a tricky topic to tackle as I found out with my very first set of lyrics that seemed to divide people.

Personally I think is an absolute gem of a song. Fantastic imagery and great use of metaphors. I loved every line and the minor nits I have are about structure, but you've already explained that one, so I won't mention them.

I'm not a great fan of punk, so it might not work for me when put to music, but as a set of lyrics, they're as good as I've read in a long time.

Hope you get more comments Shortwhat, because the lyrics certainly deserve them.

Well done!

[jaake]

Legitimately brilliant, best thing I've come across on this forum so far. Very much like your use of imagery and your concern with Christian symbolism, which is something I'm trying very much myself to use. In fact, based on this song alone, I'll be dropping you an inbox.

[shortwhat]

Thanks loads guys  I was expecting I'd cause an arguement or something so I'm glad I didn't

[Vintage54]

   
  Shortwhat,
            "Christianty in the media" You are just gonna have to educate man. Why? cos i don't know what the media is pushing anymore. I don't buy papers, and the news on tv, is a total stranger these days. I'm sure there's something profound here, the lines kinda punch me that way. I applaud, loudly, because it makes a f***ing change. Powerful lines, even though i'm not entirely sure, where your'e coming from.

                                Vintage54

[shortwhat]

I've been hearing a lot on the news about this church called 'westboro baptist church.'
It's basically just a bunch of homophobic assholes who go to gay pride events and whatnot and protest and make people's lives hell. If you're interested you can read more here; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Westboro_Baptist_Church

They basically just suck, and with the song I was trying to go for how people like this give Christianity a really bad name these days, along with conversion therapy (forcing homosexual/transgender people to be straight) which was done by many churches in the US (now thankfully is illegal.) I just feel that although the majority of Christians are perfectly fine, their faith is of no harm to anyone, there are the few that make everything suck.

V1 is about 'losing faith' and going to these 'bad churches' in attempt to get it back
V2 is exploring the loose ends of Christianity, and how some of the believable things can leave them 'screaming to be saved' or otherwise
V3 is about the conversion therapy, because I feel like it's an important topic.
V4 touches back up on V1, although it's more truthful about it.

Sorry for rambling on  just started typing then I couldn't stop.

[Dogmax]

First of all congratulation on a fabulous write at first a bit confuse about the first verse but still a fabulous write, i can understand why you want to go with the punk style with these wonderful lyrics of your but believe me longer than 4 minutes with these lyrics from what im reading with be okay with me, but with or without the punk style im still looking forward to hearing this.

Nice one.