There's a Scandinavian/Viking/Scorpions (I know - they're German...) type vibe here for me.
When the hook line 'Heart of ice and steel' comes up the 2nd time after 'day after day..' I was expecting 'Heart of ice and clay...' maybe? Might be worth looking at as a lyrical variation....
I'd back off the attack at the start and come in more gradually with the vocal intensity. You storm in full blast from the start and it needs more build.
I like the guitar pick but I'd back it off a little.
There's a drum roll back into the track - the kick sounds really thin and doesn't mix with the rest of the roll. Try fattening it up or maybe try another sample?
Can you post the lyrics so we can have a read?
Cheers,
Alan.
Sound advice (all of then), thanks a lot.
However, I'm not sure if I understand the last comment about the drums?
Never mind the old lyrics, as I wrote they were not that good and a few weeks back I got an idea where I could salvage the parts a like and reuse them. As a matter of fact I'm almost done, probably a tweak or two left. I'll have to change the melody/phrasing here and there but I have no problem with that. IMHO, this is better than the old lyrics.
Hearts of ice and steel
On a cold winters evening
the shadows ascending
from backyards and stairwells
they slowly arise
in silence they gather
in front of the churches
in search for a hot meal
and a bed for the night
Oh Why?
why must it be?
that we're so blind
to the suffering we see
we close our eyes
we walk on by
with hearts of ice and steel
the sense of guilt
we push aside
it's not our problem, nor our fault
and we have worries of our own
we close our ranks
we shut our doors
with hearts of ice and steel
See, the shadows
are reflections
of a future never born
a glimpse of who you could have been
had your hopes been left forlorn
surrounded by your family
with a place to call your own
while the shadows, the live and die alone
they live and die alone
In the bleak midday sunlight
the shadows are crouching
at the gates of our temples
of richness and wealth
The strong
they get stronger
and the weak
they get lost
in the maelstrom of progress
you swim or you drown
2 x Chorus
