[stavcoby]

Hello

https://soundcloud.com/reflectionandthempva/stalling-my-falling-star-rough-demo
Had this song bouncing around my DAW for a couple of months, song was actually written in 1999.

Needs something to give the chorus more boost and i can't put my finger on what?  By boost, I mean, give It that returned home feeling???

Lead vocal needs something too, ideas ? feedback much appreciated cheers.

(this is the first time I've put what i feel to be, unfinished track up on my sound cloud so I won't keep it there long)

Lyrics

Stalling my falling star

A’int no reason, why there,
A’int no dark
something tells me, that I,
A’int got far, but all of my
self intentions, are just,
way too large, i got
Inhibitions, that i,
A’int apart, of all your
future plans, so woman don't,
sing that song,
You know i, need a place to park in,
all my dreams of old

It seem like your stalling my falling star

See them look at me, with those,
eyes in half
I tell them, take it easy man,
I'm just taking it, all the straight path
so many stories, I can’t,
read them all
I need to, mark my pages, man,
I gotta,keep my mind aloft
No encouragement, and yet,
so many flaws
you try to, sell me love,
 like its sold in coffee jars

It seem like your stalling my falling star

If you should ever call on me, and maybe you will
just know you can always call on me, and ill come from far
don't go stalling my falling star

[Alan Starkie]

This is a good example of a well worked track but it sounds like a song from 1995.

It sounds like it belongs on the soundtrack to 'Dumb and Dumber'.

That's not an insult but it definitely sounds dated.

Are the guitars going through plugins? They sound effected rather than recorded live through a mic.

Maybe that's it?

[stavcoby]

Ha ha yeah I love dumb and dumber and actually have the soundtrack haha cheers thats awesome.

Guitars on this are not via amp mic they are DI to my interface direct to logic pro x and then have amp plugins.

I was going for a ninetiesesque Barenaked ladies mixed with Abbey road era beatles vibe so your observations are spot on cheers.

The nineties / eighties esque synth riff on top of the lead guit riff i feel gives it that sound prob the most. 

I need more of a lift when the chorus riff drops, but I can't figure out how to do that best :/

Thanks for your feedback mate

[diademgrove]

Hi stavcoby,

I missed 1995 and dumb and dumber so to me it doesn't sound dated. Its not music I'd buy but that's always down to personal taste.

I'm not sure why you would want a lift after the chorus riff. The words don't need one. The verses explain why your star is falling and the chorus says don't stop it. I like the words and feel the music compliments them.

I'm not really keen on the middle 8. Reminds me of something I have played a lot, Abbey Road. So when I heard it I started replaying Abbey Road in my head. Unless you want people like me to divert their attention from your song to the Beatles I'd think about changing it.

I feel the guitar solo should have come after the first chorus or before the middle 8, but I may be being too critical.

If you disagree feel free to ignore me,

Keith

[stavcoby]

It's the chorus riff section I feel still needs to lift The middle 8 I can't figure out which abbey road song your thinking if but I have been till recently that it is very "oasis" - all around the world which I can see a bit