[benjo]

hey guys,

my wife took me on a trip some time ago
and I was so inspired to write this
it was the last thing we saw on the trip
I won't say who it's about I hope you get it

  THANKYOU DOGMAX PAT FOR YOUR HELP


               WHITE PIANO
               ------ = ------


 stood outside a Mendips house
 on menlove avenue
 looked up to the little window
 my thoughts were just on you

 a boy confused
 his ego bruised
 aunty was there
 and they played the blues

 I closed my eyes used my mind
 took me to a magical time

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 some body stole tomorrow

 kaleidoscope of colours
 a mixed up mashed up
 twisted world unforgiving
 I listened to your lyrics
 it all made sense to me
 and I inhaled it deep
 it took the pain away
 it helped to set me free-ee

 I closed my eyes used my mind
 took me to a magical time

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 some body stole tomorrow

 a shout in the dark
 a fist full of sparks
 lay still on the ground
 was the brightest star
 and the world cried
 just for a moment the world died

 they have their place, strawberry fields
 people mourn and candles burn for peace

 I closed my eyes used my mind
 took me to a magical time

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano
 playing on a white piano...

 

 © copyright house all rights reserved...









 

  









 

[GTB]

Hi Benjo, nice song, well put together and yes, I get it.  In fact you just inspired me to write a song called "where were you when..." - thanks :-)
GTB

[BooBoo]

I hope I don't sound really stupid saying I don't get it but I don't get it!1!1!1!1 I really like the chorus and the way you use the word White. It's a really nice song and it all seems to flow well while reading. Like it.

[hardtwistmusic]

hey guys,

my wife took me on a trip some time ago
and I was so inspired to write this
it was the last thing we saw on the trip
I won't say who it's about I hope you get it

  THANKYOU DOGMAX PAT FOR YOUR HELP


               WHITE PIANO
               ------ = ------


 stood outside a medips house
 on menlove avenue
 looked up to the little window
 my thoughts were just on you

 a boy confused
 his ego bruised
 aunty was there
 and they played the blues

 I closed my eyes used my mind
 took me to a magical time

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 some body stole tomorrow

 kaleidoscope of colours
 a mixed up mashed up
 twisted world unforgiving
 I listened to your lyrics
 it all made sense to me
 and I inhaled it deep
 it took the pain away
 it helped to set me free-ee

 I closed my eyes used my mind
 took me to a magical time

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano

 some body stole tomorrow

 a shout in the dark
 a fist full of sparks
 lay still on the ground
 was the brightest star
 and the world cried
 just for a moment the world died

 they have their place, strawberry fields
 people mourn and candles burn for peace

 I closed my eyes used my mind
 took me to a magical time

 I can see you
 in a white suit
 in a white room
 playing on a white piano
 playing on a white piano...

 

 © copyright house all rights reserved...
 

1.  What is "medips"?   I'm American and have no frame of reference for that term. 
2.  Love the entire white piano concept.  I can see in my mind what you are talking about, and frankly, I don't mind that I don't really know WHY it's important.  If I listened repeatedly, my mind would come up with a plausible reason, and then the song would be personal to me. 
3.  If you don't have a cadence based reason why not to, I'd suggest   "Someone stole tomorrow yesterday."

4.  The following is my least favorite set of lines in this.  Can't draw any reference to word pictures, and don't have enough clues regarding it's meaning to make it fit with the mental pictures I already have from the other parts. 

kaleidoscope of colours
a mixed up mashed up
 twisted world unforgiving
 I listened to your lyrics
 it all made sense to me
 and I inhaled it deep
 it took the pain away
 it helped to set me free-ee

This set of lines kind of de-personalized the whole lyric for me.  Since I couldn't make sense of it, I'd have rather it wasn't there. 

Aside from that, I REALLY found this to have a powerful imagery.  And it sang well in most places.  I sang your "white piano" part (I assume it's the chorus) really quickly and with a definite cadence/beat.  Liked that part totally. 

[adamholden]

This is good. I get the Lennon/imagine reference. You don't lay it on thick till we get to strawberry fields! I think it needs some work to really make the more general elements work along with the allusions and so. I'm on the bus so not easy to type lots. Can do later if you think it useful. Is the some body separation deliberate? Hard to make it sound as well as read like this.


Lots of Lennon songs. Not John by Loudon Wainright. Recent and of place closer on Dylan's Tempest record. Um Roll on John. They opt for name in the title. You're is more subtle and nicely personal, just need to keep going.

Adam

[Stylus]

Hi  Tony
             I got it from  'MENLOVE AVENUE     You have something here..... I saw Nowhere Boy &
 Lennon  was very talented & an eccentric  he is a legend &  a song like this is both  a tribute &
a reminder of his legacy.  Yes I cant wait to hear this.........

        Like  HARDTWIST...........   ''What'z     Medips       Cheerz   Stylus

[benjo]

hey


thanks so much for the feedback on this it really means a lot

GTB,                       so glad you got this and that it inspired you mate that means so much
                              I hope I get to see and hear what you do, thank you

BOOBOO,                sorry I think this was before your time, thanks for commenting though


HARDTWISTMUSIC,              mendips is what the house is called that he grew up in

                                          
3.  If you don't have a cadence based reason why not to, I'd suggest   "Someone stole tomorrow yesterday."
sorry I don't understand this question,                              
                              
 kaleidoscope of colours          this verse relates to the weird things like sgt P L H C Band
 a mixed up mashed up          and the campaigns he went on for peace
 twisted world unforgiving       the fact that someone could consider taking his life
 I listened to your lyrics          so many different meanings in there songs even about paul
 it all made sense to me          being killed,   the zebra crossing and how they dressed
 and I inhaled it deep              it's about the drugs
 it took the pain away             yes this verse is a collage of their days and happenings with
 it helped to set me free-ee     the  band,  hope you understand more now, call it a bridge

                                            thank you so much really nice that you liked it

ADAMHOLDEN,                      great comments mate you know your stuff,
                                            yeah the some body stole tomorrow is the bad guy that did the deed
                                            it is so difficult to write about someone like this
                                            but I didn't want to give a name up because it's different
                                            his life was a strange one really from start to finish
                                            great comments thanks again


my old mate STYLUS,             yeah mendips is the name of the house on menlove avenue
                                            the little window relates to his bedroom window
                                            thanks mate as always,

                                  

[hardtwistmusic]

hey


thanks so much for the feedback on this it really means a lot

GTB,                       so glad you got this and that it inspired you mate that means so much
                              I hope I get to see and hear what you do, thank you

BOOBOO,                sorry I think this was before your time, thanks for commenting though


HARDTWISTMUSIC,              mendips is what the house is called that he grew up in

                                          
3.  If you don't have a cadence based reason why not to, I'd suggest   "Someone stole tomorrow yesterday."
sorry I don't understand this question,                              
                              
 kaleidoscope of colours          this verse relates to the weird things like sgt P L H C Band
 a mixed up mashed up          and the campaigns he went on for peace
 twisted world unforgiving       the fact that someone could consider taking his life
 I listened to your lyrics          so many different meanings in there songs even about paul
 it all made sense to me          being killed,   the zebra crossing and how they dressed
 and I inhaled it deep              it's about the drugs
 it took the pain away             yes this verse is a collage of their days and happenings with
 it helped to set me free-ee     the  band,  hope you understand more now, call it a bridge

                                            thank you so much really nice that you liked it

ADAMHOLDEN,                      great comments mate you know your stuff,
                                            yeah the some body stole tomorrow is the bad guy that did the deed
                                            it is so difficult to write about someone like this
                                            but I didn't want to give a name up because it's different
                                            his life was a strange one really from start to finish
                                            great comments thanks again


my old mate STYLUS,             yeah mendips is the name of the house on menlove avenue
                                            the little window relates to his bedroom window
                                            thanks mate as always,

                                  

Now I feel a little foolish.  Had no idea it was about Lennon.  I'm a more casual fan obviously.  Now that I know, I'll give it another read. 

[benjo]

hey hardtwistmusic,

I hope you enjoy it better next read now you know
and please don't feel foolish, after all there is no name

thanks for taking the time mate.

                                      tony.

[Stylus]

  All Good...

            Hi  Tony   Now I see.......  Its cause you've spelt it   Medips 

            so I thawd  it were about   Nacho's  Tortilla's  etc.


             Nice   Its Instantly  LENNON:  WHITE PIANO      Cheerz  bud!     

[benjo]

HEY STYLUS,

THANKS FOR THAT MATE CORRECTED IT NOW
CAN'T BELIEVE I SPELT MENDIPS WRONG

         THANKS MAN,     TONY.

[PeeJay]

Hi Tony,

I guessed what this was about before I read it.

You’ve done a good write and I think aunt Mimi would have liked it too.

You’ve left out poor Yoko though!

One thing I would suggest is to put ‘the’ Mendips house instead of ‘a’. As that makes it sound as if it’s a house set in the Mendips which I think are hills in Somerset

Nice one,

Phil.

[beckylucythomas]

Love this! Such a well crafted conundrum/tribute.

I didn't know the menlove/mendips ref - i did see nowhere boy but guess i wasn't paying enough attention! But got it of course from the white room white piano stuff (which is brilliant btw) plus a few other little clues from his life and style that you drop in along the way. Glad you posted an explanation too though, as there are even more connections and references that you've drawn than i would have realised!

This would be amazing with just a tiny hint of sgt p's / yellow sub style psychedelia dropping in at the right place....maybe a bit of sitar!....

Are you going to record it??

[habiTat]

A good piece of writing this, some nice references but not too much.

I can imagine it featuring that 'imagine' piano sound quite prominently, as well as little hints of the other famous sounds incl. the mellotron and sitar.

Definitely worth developing this.

[benjo]

hey

thank you for your comments and feed back

PEEJAY,     i'm made up you liked this mate, mmm I don't know if it would make that much difference
                writing the mendips house or a mendips house,
                yeah didn't involve yoko or many others it would get to complicated if I put all in

CACO,       i'm really happy you enjoyed this, and if there is someone who would like to record it
                I would be delighted thank you

HAB,         you are spot on my friend with that imagine vid I know he is not wearing a white suit
                that comes from him being in heaven and being dead so imagine the scene in heaven
                I think its a heavenly scene anyway thanks mate glad you liked it

                                                                                          tony.