[habiTat]

Hello

It's been a while but I'm still working on all this concept album malarky, on and off

This is my initial idea for Ira (wrath) (you've seen the lyrics) Our character is pretty angry, and is out for revenge for being jilted.

I decided to use a similar chord sequence to Invidia (envy), partly cos I am running out of ideas  also, to help tie things together nicely, and partly because it fitted quite well that wrath is born out of envy, so it connects the songs in that way.

Anyway, I'd really appreciate any ideas for production/instrumentation you may have on this one, I tried to sing it angry, but I'm a bit passive for all that really... 

tweaked iphone recording only at this stage I'm afraid 


http://soundcloud.com/habitatsongs/ira-wrath-seven-sins-demo

You lit a fuse
Let me burn
Ran away
For no return

Set the wheels
In motion turn
No reversal
So undeserved


Out of all...
You said to me
All the lies
The plain deceit

I am here
Trigger pulled
You're lying there
Bluff is called


In a beat
Heart is broke
Off the cuff
Cold words you spoke

Broken glass
Shattered heart
No return
I'm Smashed apart


Out of all...
You said to me
All the lies
The plain deceit

I am here
Trigger pulled
You're lying there
Bluff is called

Your wasted pleas
On bended knees
Ever planting
Deadly seeds

You broke me deeply
Underneath
Now I'm fixing
Everything

[diademgrove]

This is the first song from your concept album that I've heard and may have missed a good part of the story. I liked the structure and the lyrics worked well with the music. The chorus was strong but I thought killing her because she said no to him was a bit extreme, reflecting mental illness rather than wrath. I'd have liked a bit more explanation as to why he was so angry. I recognise this may have been covered elsewhere on the album, if so sorry I missed it.

Of course, please feel free to ignore my comments if they don't fit with how you see the song.

diadem

[Neil C]

Just love you iphone recordings.
Guitar sound angry!
I starting of thinking it was too slow but having listened to it its now a build song. So I wouldn't stop and bring it down at your 'wasted pleas' I'd just continue with a slow build, just getting louder and anger.
So i'd start stripped as it is, then bring in some marching drums and add to it [ a bit like I want you by the Beatles if that makes sense ] and slowly increase the volume and intensity right up to the end. Vocals have to sit on top though.
BTW in which country is this concept located?
 
Neil

[darreldo]

I like your chord progression. good song mate. sang well too, can't wait to hear a proper recording of it

[Alan Starkie]

Yeah I can hear a White Album vibe going on here.

Just needs to build right from the beginning to the end with a crescendo of noise maybe.

I've not heard the rest of your album so yes, it does have an uneasy and psychopathic slant relating to someone being shot dead because they've upset someone else.

The character is, indeed, pretty angry!

Good recording on your phone. Great quality.

[man of simple pleasures]

i like that sound on the guitar those chords mind! could be pretty mega if you can build it up!

[benjo]

hi hab,

I absolutely love this it's really well performed,  in the guitars aggression in your voice
really well sung, lovely piece can't wait till it's finished it's going great mate,  tony...


                        PS WOW...

[Dutchbeat]

i like the song and the lyrics, i like the singing melody especially, i don't like the recording, but i understand it is only an i-phone recording....

but i think, just my two cents, sorry to be so brutal, you will need one or two songs of your seven sins album to get a totally different arrangment, doesn't have to be big orchestra, but this song IRA for instance could very well be played with piano chords IMO, in stead of the guitar....

just a thought

but great lyrics and melody