[Rish]

Hi,

I'm new to song writing and to this forum. I've recently got engaged and I am planning on singing the below at my engagement party as a surprise. I have written a short song which I'm not sure is complete or not, however any constructive criticism / feedback / changes would be highly appreciated:

[Verse 1]

You were always the girl who I wanted in my life.
I've never had to put up any form of a fight.
You have loved me from the day that I first met you.
And now I am proud to say that we are not just one, but two.

[Chorus]

Your love is all I need. Without you we're nothing so please don't ever leave.
I've never known anyone who can love me the way you do.
You mean the world to me and I know I mean as much too.

[Verse 2]

Four years have gone by and we are still the same.
You make me madly, deeply and absolutely insane.
Your love for me is an absolute treasure,
More than what my heart can possibly measure.

[Chorus]

Your love is all I need. Without you we're nothing so please don't ever leave.
I've never known anyone who can love me the way you do.
You mean the world to me and I know I mean as much too.

[Verse 3]

Perhaps it's simply that I love you more than words can say
But I've written this to song show you how much you mean to me everyday.
I'll always love every little part of you, and how we became so perfectly true.

Thanks 

[seriousfun]

Cant hear this as there is no link to the song or should it perhaps be in the lyric section?

[terrysains]

I'm of the opinion it may be better to read this as a poem to your beloved as the words may be lost a bit in a song to start with at the engagement then you can turn it into a song at your leisure or for the wedding!
Good luck to you both. Terry.

[Dave Bradley]

Aw, very sweet.

One line in particular though that I don't think quite works...

"And now I am proud to say that we are not just one, but two."

Usually we think if an engagement as being the start of a union, two become one and all that...

[Rish]

Thanks for the replies & comments. I believe I may have posted this in the incorrect category as 'seriousfun' quoted.

Science base - I see what you mean, I'll have a think on how to change that. Thanks for the tip.