[Dan Firth]

hi guys,
I just introduced myself. New to this page and it looks very interesting so far!

I recently recorded a song I wrote called "The Honest Truth" in my friend's basement and I have more songs to come. It still needs A LOT of work I think, but since it being my first ever recorded song and me being very new to this whole songwriting process I am pleased with the outcome(we made a silly video for it too, just for fun and for the sake of a friend of mine who loves editing and filming). It would be cool with some feedback and it would be great to talk to some more people who are in to songwriting on just a basic level or also some with passion :-) As you may be able to hear, I am very inspired by the singer/songwriter style. I am inspired by people such as John Mayer, James Taylor, James Morrison, Jason Mraz, Jack Johnson, Bob Marley, Eric Clapton, Ed Sheeran, Van Morrison and so on...

The lyrics don't mean that much in this song, I was basically in a pretty bad mood at that time when I wrote it. Usually I put more effort in to the lyrics, but at this time I was just confused and didn't feel "understood" by people, so I wrote the line "Don't you worry you tell me to, but is that really the honest truth" because I felt that people didn't understand the fact that I couldn't stop worrying. I was basically very confused at that time!

Please bare in mind that this recording of the song is very early and I am very new to this... What do you think about the singing, the structure of the song and what could you imagine would be cool to add to the song? I hope you like it.

link to my song "The Honest Truth"

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Cheers
Dan

[crystalsuzy]

Hi Dan and welcome to this forum ...first...I love the title, and if this is your first recorded song and you are new to the song writing process...WOW! I think you've done a great job...everything is crystal clear...you have an awesome voice and the whole production is excellent...love the video as well...you are obviously a young guy and I love that you are inspired by the singer songwriter style...that's refreshing...I think the lyrics are really good for an off the cuff kinda thing and I personally like the sparseness of this song...it suits the honesty of what you're feeling at the time...you could add drums etc. but I personally like it as is...way to go can't wait to hear more of your stuff...I think you should be on the radio waves

[Dan Firth]

@crystalsuzy
Wow! thanks a lot, that is a big compliment. I am working with a drummer atm, so I will possibly be posting some more some time soon. Glad you liked it!

[joetattie]

Just keep doing what you're doing. Cracking stuff.
I really can't add much else. Great job.

[Boydie]

This is really great stuff and the type of music I love listening to

You have a very "recordable" tone to your voice which is both soulful and modern sounding

The second chord in the guitar riff was bothering me slightly - it sounded like a major chord whereas I think a minor or "power chord" 5th (without the major or minor 3rd) may flow a little better

I don't have my guitar with me at the moment to check but you may want to experiment if you come to re-record the track

The production side of my head took over whilst listening to this and I could hear in my head a funky "live" drum beat and a very rhythmic bass line motoring along - which I think will elevate the track to the next level  for you

The lyrics seemed to fit well with the track and did not "stick out" so I think they are fine

If you did want to rework them I would keep the message simple - but you have mentioned you usually work more on the lyrics so no real worries hear

All in all great stuff and welcome to the forum - I look forward to hearing more of your stuff

[Neil C]

Liked the voice and guitar together, it bounced along nicely.
Sound quite now pop, with a bit of soul in your vocals. I imagine a modern producer would enjoy working with you.
Loads of potential.

Neil 

[stephaniedema]

Hi Dan and welcome to the forum

First recording? Wow, that's impressive!
Very catchy pop sound. And don't we all recorgnise the feeling of not being understood?
I do think that drums would make it even catchier, just that extra bit of crunch.
Keep em coming, loving it over here.

Greetings
SD

[Binladeda]

Hi, You want the honest truth ....bloody brilliant.  Loved the way you throw yourself into the delivery. Excellent vocals/guitar playing. Nothing wrong with this. Really enjoyed listening, and the video was fun....love it as it is.  Great song and welcome 

[habiTat]

Welcome!!

This is excellent, really really strong song. Great guitar, great production, great vocals, all very funky and cool 

Your first recording? hmm, are you sure...? 

Thanks for sharing.

[ShinyThang]

First off ... FFS post the lyric!   Sorry, pet peeve.

I'm guessing you know this is really good right? I mean, you have to know that? It's just guitar, bass and vox and it's a great sound. The singing is some of the best I've heard here or anywhere and the playing is spot on. You can't just pick up an axe and do that, it takes a lot of work to make it sound that easy. You guys also look very comfortable on camera and I always warm to performers who look like they're having fun. Really nice harmonies. Are you a band or did you just rope in a couple of mates to make a vid? Sorry if you explained that in your post. I know the mods ask for some background with each song but to me it's all 'yada yada yada' I just hear the song (but I do like to read the lyric ... did I mention that already?)

Structurally I've got no suggestions for change. It is great as it is. if a little on the short side. Any change is preference really. What you've done does the job because I was humming along with the chorus before the first play ended. Nice little mid 8 in there already so, I can't roll out my usual 'stick a middle 8 in'. My preference is to have a rest from the voice somewhere and let an instrument into the light for a few bars but it all depends on you not me.

I was just trying to catch up on my reviews but this one stopped me in my tracks. It is a seriously good song and that's the honest truth.

[The Color of Oldfield]

Awesome tune Dan, and im pretty much agreeing with a lot of the comments....

Good vocals / music / production and vibe....

Regards,

Pete Oldfield
The Color Of Oldfield

[Sing4me88]

Man you can sing! This could easily be Ed Sheeran singing this song. Damn I'm still listening to the song again and wrestling with the fact you have such a great voice.

I love everything about this. The vocals are superb and they match the lyrics and the guitar so well it makes the song so strong. The harmonies are spot on also.

I think you should heed Boydies advice re getting it 'fully produced' as IMO this song is ripe to be taken to the next level.

I really, really enjoyed this one and can't wait until it is 'finished' to hear it but don't leave me hanging until then. Bang up another one of your songs when the time limit between posts expires!

[seriousfun]

The Honest Truth hmmm....

You know what, I havnt listened to your song. You have been a member for six weeks and have failed to post a single review on anybody, so I refer you to the rules

http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/feedback-on-works-in-progress/rules-and-guidelines-for-posting-in-the-review-forums-read-before-posting/


Allan.

[Dan Firth]

The Honest Truth hmmm....

You know what, I havnt listened to your song. You have been a member for six weeks and have failed to post a single review on anybody, so I refer you to the rules

http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/feedback-on-works-in-progress/rules-and-guidelines-for-posting-in-the-review-forums-read-before-posting/


Allan.

Hi Allan, I am very sorry for this. It was not my intention to disobey the forum rules. I have been very busy lately, and it has not come into habit to check the site quite enough and I had no idea that my song had gotten this much attention. I am very flattered by all the comments and it means very much to me. I have posted a few comments on some other songs though. The reason for me maybe not giving out comments is also that I have very little experience and therefore feel uninclined to give out comments since they come from someone who is so new in this business, where everybody seems further ahead of me. But I will take your comment into account.

Man you can sing! This could easily be Ed Sheeran singing this song. Damn I'm still listening to the song again and wrestling with the fact you have such a great voice.

I love everything about this. The vocals are superb and they match the lyrics and the guitar so well it makes the song so strong. The harmonies are spot on also.

I think you should heed Boydies advice re getting it 'fully produced' as IMO this song is ripe to be taken to the next level.

I really, really enjoyed this one and can't wait until it is 'finished' to hear it but don't leave me hanging until then. Bang up another one of your songs when the time limit between posts expires!

Thank you so much for this. This is an amazing comment, and I really appreciate what you have said. :-)

Welcome!!

This is excellent, really really strong song. Great guitar, great production, great vocals, all very funky and cool 

Your first recording? hmm, are you sure...? 

Thanks for sharing.

Hi habiTat Thank you for the compliments that is very nice of you!!!

This is my first recording yes. I got a friend to help me out, who had a microphone and a computer programme to sort out the "production" of the song.

Dan

PS. I would like to thank everybody for their comments. I have not checked the site enough, but I will definitely be doing it more regularly since people are so nice. I am very overwhelmed by all this :-)

The lyrics are:

Help me up off the ground
Finally I have been found
But the tunes they still don’t make any sense
While words are running through my head
I don’t even have a penny to spend
How do I even make use of this guitar?
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
You ask questions like how are you,
Isn’t the answer the clear to you
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
Is it just this state of mind
I can’t seem to leave behind
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
But don’t you worry you tell me to,
And is that really the honest truth?
What’s the reason for our worrying
Nobody told us were hurrying
Running off from life, it’s just in front of our eyes
Jumping off that bridge you say,
Young boy you’ve got reasons to stay
Your mother loves you and your daddy’s ok
So listen to me when I say
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
You ask questions like how are you,
Isn’t the answer the clear to you
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
Is it just this state of mind
I can’t seem to leave behind
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
But don’t you worry you tell me to,
And is that really the honest truth?
So give me a chance to feel what’s real again
I don’t wanna post pictures to my instagram
The searching is longer than I thought
When you ask questions like you do
Are they really true to you?

(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
You ask questions like how are you,
Isn’t the answer the clear to you
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
Is it just this state of mind
I can’t seem to leave behind
(Uh, uh, uh, uh)
But don’t you worry you tell me to,
And is that really the honest truth?
The honest truth….
But don’t you worry you tell me to,
And is that really the honest truth?

[KEROUAC1957]

Very very good especially considering it's your first recording. You are a serious talent.

I disagree with Shinythang. I hate reading lyrics. I prefer listening to them. That's the whole point right?

And Seriousfun I can't believe you haven't really listened to this. Get real, have some serious fun and and give this guy some credit.