[Atnightsongwriter]

Distant Sands (2012)

She walks on distant sands
There goes my baby
She walks on distant sands
I’m far from my lady…

Across the desert there she goes, a sandstorm whipping up her love
Eyes so precious, shining jewels, turning the pyramids into dust
Her body in motion, dancing and bringing out the sun
A golden oasis to hypnotize the thoughts of anyone…

The sphinx hides all its riddles and lives for the eastern tongue
She speaks a language to my body, my spirit feels so young
Even though a plane couldn’t take me to her feet
I can taste her every moment that her heart beats

Because..
She walks on distant sands
There goes my baby
She walks on distant sands
I’m far from my lady
She walks on distant sands
My beautiful lady
She walks, talks and loves from afar
She can be found in the stars
I gotta get to my baby.

I can hear her on the shore, across the sea a siren sings where she lies
Her hair I’m so sure paints the dark and lets her shadow glide
All across the globe
And I’ve never needed a looking glass to spy
But I need her so
So I can take a trip and feel her all inside

There she goes a traveller looking to find me in her beautiful escape
I’d knock down castles to find her, I’d fight the greatest wars
Because since the day of your birth I found my faith,
I’d take a flying leap over mountains of fire its what you deserve
it’s you my love, you make my blood burn up a million degrees,
Only you make the world turn

That’s why…

She walks on distant sands
There goes my baby
She walks on distant sands
I’m far from my lady
She walks on distant sands
My beautiful lady
She walks, talks and loves from afar
She can be found in the stars
I gotta get to my baby.

Ohhh yeah I cant let anyone take her place
Because on this earth is where she roams
That’s her throne
Blessing each country with her grace

I couldn’t let Mother Nature take her away
Because she walks, talks and loves
on distant sands
And brings power to every place
I just need to see her face…

She walks on distant sands
There goes my baby
She walks on distant sands
I’m far from my lady
She walks on distant sands
My beautiful lady
She walks, talks and loves from afar
She can be found in the stars
I gotta get to my baby.

She’s on distant sands
There goes my baby
She’s blessing all the land
I might just go crazy
She’s on distant sands
I need my lady

She walks, talks and loves from afar, the world is hers to dance
Fulfilling all the flowers, the ground is running with romance

She walks, talks and loves from afar, I’m a believer in her soul
That could bring heat to all nations and warm up the north pole

She walks, she talks
and turns the hurricanes loose
and makes me see
that no natural disaster
could be the end of her
because she lives eternally

so let the axis shoot lightspeed
Because minutes, hours, days would be a thing we needn’t dream
As long as I’m with you…
That’s all what matters to me

Because
She walks on distant sands
There goes my baby
I’ll give her both my hands
To make a beautiful baby
She walks on distant sands
There goes my baby
All my hopes and plans
Are driving me crazy
She walks on distant sands
And there goes my baby
I watch on distant sands
My beautiful lady

I’m never gonna leave her, I’ll always stay
Because I met my baby on distant sands , the heavens can see what we’ve made

[S.T.C]

Hmm..plenty of words..well laid out....

When writing a set of lyrics...i think you should be able to step back..and, like a table set out for a meal...everything should seem to be in the right place..and it is here.

The theme is poetically written..but i think theres too much of it....it`s to rich...over powering imagery...

`The sphinx hides all its riddles and lives for the eastern tongue`

`Fulfilling all the flowers, the ground is running with romance`

`That could bring heat to all nations and warm up the north pole`


I think you`ve got the right idea`s...you just need to tone it down a bit...so ....some verse that sits well in a poem...won`t in a song.

[Atnightsongwriter]

Thank you for your constructive Criticism "songs that cry"

I do agree with overpowering imagery but the essence of the song is meant to sort of overpower the person that reads it so its like a trance that the lyrics put the person into.

I do agree that sometimes poetry makes its way into my lyrics. I like to write a song with meaning but also make it unusual in a way that fits my style but I may go back and write a less poetic version of the song and see how I feel then.

Thanks for taking the time to read and review my song. I will post others soon as see what you think of them

[Sing4me88]

I really like some of the very powerful imagery but I concur with songsthatcry in relation to sometimes having a little too much... I'm guessing this song is singer/songwriter style possibly even acoustic by the length of the lyrics but I feel the lyrics might need tightened up and cut back a bit as there is a considerable body of lyrics present and I don't know how you could accommodate them all in an easily flowing 'song'. I'm certainly not deriding your efforts, they are by all means admirable and quite clever and some really good work I fell maybe just a bit too much of it If necessary you could even go a la Emile Sande and split the lyrics into Part 1 and Part 2

Good write  all the same and I hope this helps in some way

[Atnightsongwriter]

Thank you sing for me in your review. The melody is eastern and quite a hypnotic sort of throwback to micheal Jackson dangerous sound which was cutting beats and sensual lyrics And smooth melodys. I have always admired dangerous as micheal jacksonsl a greatest album for the lyrics were masterpiece ! It inspired me to write the song. I agree i need to cut it down and I have actually taken some verses out as it is slightly drawn out at the time I just wanted my ideas to flow so I suppose I never re did it and cut back. I implore everyone who liked this song to listen to micheal Jackson can't let her get away or in the closet or she drives me wild as that is the vibe and tone of the song I was trying to create.

[The Corsair]

It's good, ad I like the way you've brought some 'desert stereotypes' into it (pyramids and the like). However, when it moves away from those it feels like it begins to lack in metaphor. Metaphor is good, metaphor is a bit cryptic and that makes something exciting. I think you need to strike a batter balance between making the listener figure out what something means in the context of the story and telling the story outright, as right now you have too much of the latter.

[Atnightsongwriter]

Thanks the corsair for your review. I will take that into account when writing my next song which I will show you when it is finished and see if there is any difference or improvement from all concerned on this post.