[digger72]

Hi All,

Thanks to those who listened to the last track. This one is less dark, and perhaps a bit more mainstream. My plan is that Till The End was the end of the story, but is at the beginning of the project, then the next few songs tell the story in flashback, the songs getting progressively darker - well, that's the plan.
Hopefully it's still interesting, despite not being quit so weird.

Thanks for listening and any feedback.
Much appreciated.

Digger

http://soundcloud.com/digger-72/crippled-eden

Crippled Eden

I got a fascination
With the love song
That you're playin'
You're the needle
In my arm

You're so beautiful
A fabulous
Disaster
You're suicide
And all her charms

Chorus:
You're pullin' me under
You're callin'
I'll play my part

You're an angel
A seraphim
Bright burning
Safe harbour
When the world is cold

You're the devil
Mephisto
Come claim me
I made the deal
Come take my soul

Chorus:

Sometime soon
Temptation gonna find me
Sometime soon
Is here and now
Come bite the apple
Live in this Eden
Come bite the apple
This Eden is hell

I need to hear God
God bless me
Said nothing
I held the cross
In bloodied palms

You're so cruel
A sickness
Death poet
Guess I knew that
From the start

Chorus:

[tina m]

hi
intresting lyrics & i like your voice ive not heard anything of yours before i thought it was a quite a good song but a bit similar to a lot of other songs & not enuff to set it apart from them....those chords are a bit well used......i just think people are so jaded you have to do something crazy to get there attention....you should have bitten a apple in the middle of the song & had a snake hissing & some biblical thunder & a preacher ranting  sorry its saturday night

[refusedrevival]

Definitely I like the song.
It could be 30 seconds shorter or then the beat could be different under the guitar solo ... to get little variation to the rhythm.

[montydog]

For me the vocals are too far away in the mix and they lack any warmth or involvement. It's a bit remote and cold sounding which isn't helped by the rather icy production. I think the song is good though and with a warm, acoustic setting this could be really nice. At the moment it's a bit too West Coast rock for my taste.

[seriousfun]

Well I liked it. Not so sure on the synth effects but the vocals were cool and I like the lyrics. The melody good but perhaps became a little repetitive and could have been more effective if the song was a tad shorter and perhaps some harmonies on the chorus. The guitar was good, would have preferred more of that and less of the synth effects.

Overall, I liked this and it isnt far away from being a reallly good track. Kudos to you.

[Binladeda]

yes...good song here, really liked the lyrics. I agree with Tinam regarding the choice of chords...well used....like me that's not a bad thing....they're only 'well used' because they're good, but I spent a lot of time trying to think where I've heard that before....instead of listening to the song  Liked the 'pulling me under' hook in the vocals, and thought the guitar sounded good, and was played with a nice feel....enjoyed listening...good work

[jillianne]

Well I really enjoyed hearing this one digger ..... can't offer any suggestions to make it better from my perspective.  The vocal has that curious mix of strength and delicacy and was integrated well into the mix.  Although the lyrics were thought provoking the whole thing was actually relaxing and soothing ... all in all a combination of elements that worked for me.

[Michael]

Good song. Very interesting lyrics and I think the title is really great.
The vocals fit in nicely - just like in your last song.
The only thing I don't like about this one is the synth part. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love synthies, but the sound you chose here distracted me a bit from the rest of the mix, especially because of the rather hard panning, and I get the feeling the synth is the the exact same position in the stereo field as the electric guitar that sets in later...

If that movie of yours ever gets done (and has music like this in it) I'd very much like to see it

[digger72]

Hi All,

Thanks for listening and the varied comments. I take them all on board. I think with a song that is pretty mainstream it's a question of how you like your eggs.
The bass guitarist doesn't care for the synths either - then again he's a dyed in the wool Metalhead (not that there is anything wrong with that.)

Interested about the "icy production." I'm relatively new to the mixing, producing side, so it's a bit trial and error at the moment. I've seen "warmth," or in particular "analog warmth" mentioned in articles before. How do you go about it? Is it the initial recording process, or the stuff you do afterwards? I only use a few plugins: compressor, reverb, and noise removal. Just started dabbling with Eq but it seems a lot of hard work. I tend to rely on pedals and my amp for the sound.

In all honesty lyrics is my thing. I don't profess to be any great shakes musically. I just like putting my ideas to music.
Oh, I'm not the singer. Can't take credit for that - well, indirectly I can I suppose.

Thanks again for listening.

All the best,

Digger

[James Nighthawk]

The vocal steals this for me. The chords are workaday and the general backing is very ploddy, But, the vocal melody and general feel is lovely. So perhaps cut down the intro so the ear is slapped witht the vocal straight off. Or, compose a separate melody atop the guitar picking to drag the ear to that.

The vocal is great as I say, but perhaps a little more forwardness in both performance and sound. It could be sung with a little more bite and pushed more in the mix to make the most of it.

There is a lot of track here. 5 minutes is pushing it for me. Ending on the guitar soloing isn't how I would have run things either...

As Neil Young said:
"better to burn out Than to fade away"

[man of simple pleasures]

cool song, i dig the vocals it should have combined the vocal with electric guitar soloing after the change at two and a half minutes went a bit mental and then faded out for me so bit shorter than what it is but yeah good listen!

[Kafla]

Yeah your vocalist is very good indeed

I don't mind the chords either - it's all played all tight enough and recorded well

You could make the synth a lot darker - it's more erasure than depeche and I know what side of the fence you are on - I am sure you can tweak the settings here as it really overpowers the song when it kicks off

Nice to see you getting a band together man !

[andy5544]

Another cool tune digger , more lovely vocals ( even though the lyrics are a bit gloomy )

well done ,liked it a lot 

[flossie]

Hey digger,

This is good, get rid of the synth it doesn't add anything in my  opinion. Shorten the song down as much as you can so it's really punchy.  The verses are great, the chorus 'you're pullin me under' to me is a pre-chorus and would lead nicely to maybe just the Come bit the apple bit, not sure what melody for this existing or something else, but it needs to come off of the pre-chorus and lift it, it really sounds like you're pullin me under is leading us into something even bigger ....

Anyway, just my opinion.  But it is really good and I think you should continue to work on it but definitely drop the synth, Your daughter's voice sounds perfect for this song, lucky you!
x

[nooms]

really enjoyed this
vocal comes in a bit scary & special, something of the witch about it..a young stevie nicks maybe
liked the synths too, nice ideas  inventive
great track..
love the solo in deep space
and sounds great loud
whole thing might be a tad long but terrific never the less...
filled my bath anyway