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Little Lone Star

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MinuteSekunde

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« on: September 29, 2012, 12:36:20 AM »
Hey all, so I've been a little bit 'lost' of recent in terms of music/songwriting etc so this is the first thing I've written for a good few weeks; any feedback would be welcome, thank you :)


In a sky so clear at night
I see you there in my sight
Brightly shining, nothing around
While I lay here on the ground

I’m looking up to you there
Keeping watch, giving a stare
I keep thinking of what I see
It is all so clear to me

Little lone star standing there
Little lone star up in the air
Seeing you, help me to think clear
Seldom a chance for me to be near
Little lone star shining so bright
In a dark, cold September night
Wishing to myself for the new day
But you will always be far away

In the night time I sit and think
About the day my fear will shrink
Sitting wondering about the sky
What we see as an eye to eye

Looking around at the shine so clear
In the morning it all will disappear
Hoping for you to come back
Making start to my life soundtrack

-Chorus -

You help to change my mind
Hoping for what I can find
Seeing you helps me to believe
To keep my heart on my sleeve

Little lone star standing there
Little lone star up in the air
Seeing you, help me to think clear
Seldom a chance for me to be near
Little lone star, bright and true
Little lone star, take me next to you
I see you there every single night
Hoping for my dream to take flight

The little lone star…
Wonder where you are…
Are you far?
Little lone star
« Last Edit: September 29, 2012, 12:50:48 AM by MinuteSekunde »

titiami

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« Reply #1 on: September 29, 2012, 07:46:36 PM »
The lyrics are good, the rhyming is there, a little cliches here and there, the chorus sounds like twinkle twinkle little star but its a few weeks worth it.