[kevysc]

I'm not bitter but ....

https://soundcloud.com/kevinism1961/you-have-shamed-me?si=124d8e12c78944ce991c3065ba79fbff&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

You Have Shamed Me
 

V1

All the lies you have told

Have spread like an infection

Whispered stories that unfold

With no chance for correction

No correction

 

V2

Wicked lies that trump the truth

Are crying for attention

There is nothing I can do

There’s no chance for redemption

No redemption

 

Chorus

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You’re gonna get what’s coming

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You’re gonna get what’s coming

 

 

V3

I can’t see inside your mind

What is your motivation?

Are you naturally unkind

Or is it just the situation?

Your situation

 

Chorus

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You’re gonna get what’s coming

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You’re gonna get what’s coming

 

 

Bridge

All the lies you have told

All my dreams put on hold

Something bitter in your soul

I will never let this go

Because ….

 

Final Chorus

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You have shamed me

You’re gonna get what’s coming

I’m gonna get you

I’m gunning for you

Because you have shamed me

You’re gonna get what’s coming

[calafinestrat]

I've just listened to this track,the production is excellent. I think maybe the "you have shamed me line" is a bit overdone and might be better with some variation to the lyrics or melody in the chorus. Nice guitar and harmonies.

[Carlonely]

Great work!
Your voice and especially your vibrato remind me of David Bowie which also holds for the moody and slightly amelodic atmosphere of the whole song.
The only thing that doesn't really work for me is my impression that the guitars and the drums don't completely harmonize timing-wise. The guitars come a bit too early in my ears.

[moraamarolaloba]

I think I already told you in another forum... I liked it again, that atmosphere that the guides give... I love it, and the strength of the voice maintains the tension that the story causes.
I really like the chorus and the lyrics, although the ending is a bit disturbing... @kevysc

[popitup]

@kevysc  . . . No question about it this is a super balanced mix, with very strong vocals. You can always tell when the bass sits just right, even on headphones.
Someone mentioned Bowie, and I'm also hearing Dennis DeYoung (Styx), mostly the way you have that natural vibrato built into your voice on the sustain. Sounds strong.

[ChrisPrice]

I love the chord progression for the verses. There's some really nice bass playing here too. Possibly my favourite of yours so far. This has something special about it. My kind of music.

[Dorian]

@kevysc  Great vocals. Love the sound of the guitar! 
I have the feeling we share a taste for musical styles (glam/classic/indie rock and such).

I hope you appreciate my comment, but I do agree with @Carlonely that the timing between guitar and drums is a little bit off. Maybe a few milliseconds shifting of the guitar stem in your DAW might do the trick, but I also think it’s because the drums sound fixed / quantised (like a drum machine) in contrast to the guitars (that have a distinct human touch to it). I think it would also help to put a bit more reverb on the snare, so it blends better in the mix (resulting in less focus on the drums and more on the guitar).

My two copper 

greetings, Dorian

[kevysc]

@calafinestrat @ChrisPrice   Glad you liked it, thanks for listening and commenting!

@moraamarolaloba  Glad you liked it, I was definitely aiming for a disturbing ending (Of course, I am just playing a role of the embittered person in the song )

@popitup  I get the Bowie reference a lot ( he is a hero of mine ) but that's the first time Styx have come up ... I will take it as a huge positive !

@Carlonely @Dorian  An excellent catch on the drums! It's a consequence of my lack of skill with EZDrummer, plus I have a slightly "organic" guitar playing style At any rate, I have managed to nudge the drums forward slightly and I think it sounds tighter now. Many thanks for taking the time to give the feedback, this is what really makes this forum valuable! Kevin

[subvibe]

Hi @kevysc
Great track & love the driving bass
mix sounds open & very clear

Excellent stuff

subvibe

[Dorian]

I have managed to nudge the drums forward slightly and I think it sounds tighter now.

Yesss, this is much better! The drums don't feel that separated anymore from the rest.