[Nick Ryder]

Hey all, I’m on a creative break at the moment but thought I’d post this demo.

I’m not sure I will ever release it as the subject matter is quite personal, and whilst I know it’s not especially commercial, I’m just not sure about it in general.

It’s quite a long song but worth sticking with as I’ve done some interesting things with counter melodies and rhythm.

Anyway….

https://on.soundcloud.com/nWb37CJocWtjgc1e8

When all the lights go out you’re falling, falling
And you are drifting in a dark dark place

When fire burns so bright the heat burns your eyes
You disappear without a trace

And when religion fails you
And when the church bells toll
And you have nowhere else to turn, at, all

When you deceive yourself and pray for recompense
Its just a mirror and it makes, no sense

And when the well is dry,
And when the flowers die
And when you’re putting up your best, defence


This is not a test,
This is not a game my son
This not a practise run
And while you’re having fun……

This is not a film
This is now reality
And this is how it’s meant to be
You’re not the only one who feels this


Don’t ignore the ones who love you
Don’t betray the ones who care
The one’s you need the most, are the one’s you should keep close
They’re the ones who always will be there

Don’t forget just who you are
You’re a diamond in the rough, a brilliant rising star
Don’t give up on what you want
I’m begging of you please so I’m telling you  in this song…….

[pompeyjazz]

A creative break ? @Nick Ryder You may think that you are but I bet those song ideas are still swirling around in your head so even if you’re not actually laying anything down you’re still creating. Some very creative ideas in this one for sure, especially the unexpected change into the swing section and your multitude of instrumentation. The swing section with the Lennonesque call and response BVs is pretty damn good and really catchy. Another fine song from a fine writer 😀

[Whiskey Club]

Ridiculous.  Just so good it’s not worth me trying to critique.  Ffs, I don’t know how you do it.

Cheers - John.

[Elvis Nash]

Hey Nick
Yes very Beatle like
sounds great... with a few twists and turns production wise.
you own this man !!!

[rightly]

Yes. I've had that before
A personal song written in private is often very strong
Well crafted. I like the drama of the 1st chorus
Swingy bit is a pleasant surprise.
I often hesitate to use both strings and horns
It works here.
Quite epic, all in all.
We'll done 👏

[Nick Ryder]

A creative break ? @Nick Ryder You may think that you are but I bet those song ideas are still swirling around in your head so even if you’re not actually laying anything down you’re still creating. Some very creative ideas in this one for sure, especially the unexpected change into the swing section and your multitude of instrumentation. The swing section with the Lennonesque call and response BVs is pretty damn good and really catchy. Another fine song from a fine writer 😀

You're right. I think if your brain is wired up that way, the creative side never stops. I guess it's just that I don't have time to record any of it just yet.

Thanks for your comments, John.

[Nick Ryder]

Ridiculous.  Just so good it’s not worth me trying to critique.  Ffs, I don’t know how you do it.

Cheers - John.

Ha. Thanks, John @Whiskey Club

I just wanted to explain a bit about the process here in case you're interested.

I very much see this version of the song as an almost finished draft. What I mean by that is I think the arrangement is almost there, as are the lyrics and format, but now the real hard work begins.

I need to get a better vocal performance. I think some sections are too long, so I may shorten those. Some of the lyrics could be improved - a word here and there. The ending is average. Would it be better to fade during the sax solo?

I'll probably make some changes, and then some more until I'm relatively happy. Even then I'm not sure I'll release this song. It may be one of those which ends up on the cutting room floor.

I've learnt from past mistakes (and listening to commercial releases) that second best and rushing something out is a mistake as once it's out there, it's there. Better to take time and get it to be the best it can be!!

[shadowfax]

Wow!! big production and straight off the Beatles white album love having such good writers and producers on the forum,
what was that about creative break? get outta town!! looking forward to when you get off your break my friend!

[Whiskey Club]

Ridiculous.  Just so good it’s not worth me trying to critique.  Ffs, I don’t know how you do it.

Cheers - John.

Ha. Thanks, John @Whiskey Club

I just wanted to explain a bit about the process here in case you're interested.

I very much see this version of the song as an almost finished draft. What I mean by that is I think the arrangement is almost there, as are the lyrics and format, but now the real hard work begins.

I need to get a better vocal performance. I think some sections are too long, so I may shorten those. Some of the lyrics could be improved - a word here and there. The ending is average. Would it be better to fade during the sax solo?

I'll probably make some changes, and then some more until I'm relatively happy. Even then I'm not sure I'll release this song. It may be one of those which ends up on the cutting room floor.

I've learnt from past mistakes (and listening to commercial releases) that second best and rushing something out is a mistake as once it's out there, it's there. Better to take time and get it to be the best it can be!!

Thanks for that Nick @Nick Ryder .

I hear you.

Cheers - John.

[CaliaMoko]

I think this is amazing! I really can't improve on all the comments so far. I'll just say I agree! Inspiring. Dramatic. Great.

[Nick Ryder]

@Elvis Nash
@shadowfax
@CaliaMoko
@rightly

Thank you so much for listening and your kind words. I honestly didn't think this song would be liked that much as it's a tough listen (for me anyway).

You've made me think that it might be worth finishing and releasing after all!! Thanks, guys.

[PeteS]

Creative break my arse!  .  It's an amazing creation.

Looking bat the points raised, yes, it's long but so what?  It's an album track not meant for a commercial radio station and it's more than interesting enough to hold the listeners attention.

The changes in rhythm are really interesting, caught me by surprise and I wan't sure at first, but having played it a few times, I look forward to it now.  It's always interesting how to change things up for a 'mid 8' type section and whilst this is more than that, it nails it.

The ending works ok, I definitely wouldn't fade during the solo, but that's mainly a personal thing.  I think fades are because the producer can't think of anything to end on.  You can't fade live.  However, I don't like the last few seconds (5:18) where the sax and drums come back in.  I would just find a way to let the piano riff end it.  It's a great riff.  Do you call it riffs on a piano? 🤷‍♂️🤣

Great work Nick.

[Theresa]

It is indeed a "long" song, but no part within felt too long! It was interesting and entertaining from start to finish.

[Maya Clars]

@Nick Ryder

Great and wonderful , a little tragic and sad, but in the end very confident and cheerful!  I feel strong, strong love!
I liked the build-up in emotions throughout the song. I liked the change in the rhythm and the mood of the melody!
Beautiful and thoughtful composition. Great vocals! Great melody! Great idea!
Bravo!

Maya

[Nick Ryder]

Creative break my arse!  .  It's an amazing creation.

Looking bat the points raised, yes, it's long but so what?  It's an album track not meant for a commercial radio station and it's more than interesting enough to hold the listeners attention.

The changes in rhythm are really interesting, caught me by surprise and I wan't sure at first, but having played it a few times, I look forward to it now.  It's always interesting how to change things up for a 'mid 8' type section and whilst this is more than that, it nails it.

The ending works ok, I definitely wouldn't fade during the solo, but that's mainly a personal thing.  I think fades are because the producer can't think of anything to end on.  You can't fade live.  However, I don't like the last few seconds (5:18) where the sax and drums come back in.  I would just find a way to let the piano riff end it.  It's a great riff.  Do you call it riffs on a piano? 🤷‍♂️🤣

Great work Nick.

Thanks, @PeteS

You make some good points, especially about the ending!! Thank you.