[Whiteorange]

Hello everyone, this is my first post here. I'll give my full background on an introduction post so as not to waste time and space here. Recently I've decided to start recording songs immediately after writing them, and generally going with the first or second take. I feel like what I am trying to do is capture a performance and an atmosphere, as opposed to crafting a perfect mix. The lo-fi nature is something I embrace. I generally write the song rather quickly, and then record it as soon as possible. I started out mainly as a writer (I studied it at university) but then decided to take that approach to making music.

My songs are quite hard for me to categorise which does make it difficult to know where to share them. I stumbled upon this forum and this seemed like an interesting place. I'll post the link below and the lyrics beneath them. Thank you for your time!

https://soundcloud.com/white_orange/give-myself-2-u?utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

With your funny little ash trays
and your little compromises
and your funny little looks
and your little red books
and your hotel burnin up on the silver screen
and your cherry coloured lips and your neon tricks

I give myself to you
I give myself to you

With your open doors
and your winter clothes
and your eyes of hate
and your eyes of love
and your arms that cradle up to the mornin
and your legs that rise up like the dawn

I give myself to you
Yeah, I give myself to you

[Bankie]

I think going with a quick recording to capture the original feel is a good idea; it can often get diluted over the process and it's helpful to remember the direction you wanted. However, it was somewhat uncomfortable to listen to, mainly because you had extra beats and half-beats in random places due to the loose guitar playing. Perhaps a click track or basic drum track would have helped (which you could obviously remove after). The overall feel was good, but too raw for me.

[Whiteorange]

Thanks for the response, Bankie, I appreciate it. Incorporating a drum track is definitely something I could do. The next time I record I'll do just that. I'll be the first to admit that my guitar playing is very loose and unanchored without the drums/bass.

[pompeyjazz]

Hi @Whiteorange I enjoyed the loose feel to this and great idea to get your song recorded quickly. It had a very Dylanesque feel to it I thought. I loved the lyrics and the phrasing to them. Welcome to the forum. I hope that you enjoy it here

[moraamarolaloba]

Hola @Whiteorange

Nice to meet you!
Your song is really nice, love songs are always welcome in my ears. Very nice lyrics too, it has been a nice listening.

Stay well

Mora

[delb0y]

I really liked and enjoyed this @Whiteorange - but I may be the exception in that I wish everyone just posted a raw song, not necessarily a first or second take, or even a version recorded just hours after writing a piece (some of mine take months before they're complete), but just the song. For me, the arrangement and production is something totally separate and I always try to imagine people's songs without all that extra work. And to treat it as a performance is also music to my ears - all my songs are written with performance in mind. So I'm very pleased with your approach.

Yes, very Dylanesque and it suits your voice and the guitar playing is fine for this style. I listen to a lot of very old, mostly long dead, players and the odd half bar, hiccup, dropped or added beat, is all part of the charm, assuming one is into that sort of thing. Many don't find it charming at all :-)

The only thing I wish to comment on is the line "...eyes of hate". The rest seemed to paint a particular picture, but that line stood out as feeling (to me) somewhat out of place.

I look forward to hearing more and reading your introduction.

Derek

[MonnoDB]

Agree with the Dylan refs.. I did get a bit of Leonard Cohen too - but it might just be the way you sang "hotel" !

This is a lovely song - very warm recording too.. I really liked the instrument at the end - synths/flutey sound - what was it actually?  I'm very much looking forward to hearing more of your stuff.  Welcome to the forum!

Karen.

[Skub]

Hi and welcome Whiteorange.

I enjoyed the straightforward honesty of the song,the stripped back genre really shows the strength of a song and this one stands proud.

Thanks for sharing.

[PaulyX]

Hi WhiteOrange (cool name by the way...)
Welcome to the forum.  Hope you like it here.  Come on in, the water's lovely.
Really enjoyed your track.  To me it had a cool Americana feel.  There's a kind of world-weariness to it (the vocal delivery and the nice loose, relaxed playing of the acoustic).  The lyrics were a standout for me  - just enough to paint a picture without being too obvious.  It comes across as a really confident track, rolling at its own pace, and I think that goes for the simple production too.  Look forward to hearing more of your stuff if you stick around.

[Jamie]

@Whiteorange

Hi, really good lyric and a very Dylanesque performance. Welcome to the forum!

Enjoyed it

Jami