[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

Hi guys,

Do hope you've all been keeping well and safe in these difficult times.

This year my wife and I celebrated ten wonderful and happy years of marriage. As a gift, I wrote a song for her.

Unfortunately, I struggled with the deadline of our anniversary! The vocal delivery, in particular, needs another go. I also feel the song could benefit from a more complex production. In it's current form, I feel it has the bare bones but I will try to come back to this one when I can, and give her the song she deserves.

My wife and I like Disney, writing and travelling so I included references to this in the lyrics.

Do hope you like it. Take care everyone.

https://soundcloud.com/big-fish-small-pondettes/ten-years-smiling

Ten Years Smiling

See this face beaming bright and true.
Ten years smiling because I've got you.

Each moment filled my heart.
One seven nine eleven was the start.

Oh...

Baby you made me lucky always,
Daily I thank God for you girl,
You lit skies above me,
We danced for the stars.

Baby, nothing feels so good as,
Crazy for you every day.
You give all I want for,
Just by loving me.



Disney never could imagine you,
Princess perfect coming out the blue.

Sunrise, we live anew
Happy ever after right on cue.

Oh...

Annie, how divine that you can
Hand me truly Goddess love.
I just can't believe it.
I'm the one who walks with you.

Show me the story that you want and,
Slowly I'll make it all come true,
You write lines of love and,
I'll bind the book for you



This tin man long ago lacked a heart
Your hand in mine makes a journey start

From you I'll never run,
Make me whole and the game is won.

Oh....

Sweetheart you're the love of my life,
Beat heart, drumming for my wife.
I am lost without you,
There's just something about you.

Some day I might just deserve you,
Please stay while I earn my place.
You're too good to be true,
You just being you.

[pompeyjazz]

Hi @bigFishAndTheSmallPondets Congrats on your 10 years together. Nice indie vibe here, kinda reminds me of some late 60's stuff. Acoustic works well. I did wonder what it would sound like with some drums or percussion. Perhaps some bongos would work well and maybe the arpegio piano could drop out now and again to give the song some contrast. Nice work 

[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

Hi @bigFishAndTheSmallPondets Congrats on your 10 years together. Nice indie vibe here, kinda reminds me of some late 60's stuff. Acoustic works well. I did wonder what it would sound like with some drums or percussion. Perhaps some bongos would work well and maybe the arpegio piano could drop out now and again to give the song some contrast. Nice work 

Really kind as always @pompeyjazz. Really appreciate that.

[moraamarolaloba]

Hola @bigFishAndTheSmallPondets

It's a lovely song,  your voice sounds wonderful, full of nuances, I love the chorus, really catchy.
A very nice listening.

Stay well

Mora

[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

Hola @bigFishAndTheSmallPondets

It's a lovely song,  your voice sounds wonderful, full of nuances, I love the chorus, really catchy.
A voy nice listening.

Stay well

Mora

Thank you so much @moraamarolaloba. Glad you like my voice. I wish I could hear it as you do! Such kind words. Thanks again.

[rightly]

hey really sweet vocal
dunno if it's a man or woman, doesn't matter

Really charming lyrics
and the dynamics are great

the production could do with some tidying
there's so much good in this song it's worth doing again from scratch, I think.

the best I've heard in a while
Well Done!

[ChrisPrice]

Nothing wrong with an honest love song. The vocal is spot on imo. I agree the arrangement could be developed further but a it's really strong song. Congrats btw.

[cowparsleyman]

@bigFishAndTheSmallPondets - You have the best forum name of all of them, just love it.

10 years congratulations,  really like this, felt the piano was a bit distracting to appear all the way through, maybe leave it out of the verses...very nice song indeed, some popping P's on the Vox.

It could benefit from a harmony line in the 2nd Choruses and onward, maybe add 1 harmony, then add another in the subsequent..

Hope this helps.

[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

hey really sweet vocal
dunno if it's a man or woman, doesn't matter

Really charming lyrics
and the dynamics are great

the production could do with some tidying
there's so much good in this song it's worth doing again from scratch, I think.

the best I've heard in a while
Well Done!

"the best I've heard in a while" - now that is a compliment indeed!! Thank you so much, it really means a lot to me.

I agree. I think I may record it again.

I must admit, my voice is rather effeminate (although I am a man)!

Thanks again. The songwriter forum is so supportive.

[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

Nothing wrong with an honest love song. The vocal is spot on imo. I agree the arrangement could be developed further but a it's really strong song. Congrats btw.

Thank you. I'm glad you feel it's an honest piece of work.

Very kind words.

[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

@bigFishAndTheSmallPondets - You have the best forum name of all of them, just love it.

10 years congratulations,  really like this, felt the piano was a bit distracting to appear all the way through, maybe leave it out of the verses...very nice song indeed, some popping P's on the Vox.

It could benefit from a harmony line in the 2nd Choruses and onward, maybe add 1 harmony, then add another in the subsequent..

Hope this helps.

So glad you like the name 'Big Fish...'. It came to me while I was at Glastonbury. I thought it sounded lighthearted and reminiscent of 50s rock n roll and 60s acid rock.

Thank you for your (indeed everyone's) congratulations.

Thanks most of all for your very kind review. It does need another attempt. As you say, the vocals are popping and the instrumentation is a little one dimensional.

Will also definitely think about harmonising.

Great ideas. Thank you for listening.

[LostBoy]

Hello mate,

Well the melody is King here. It’s fab! You sound great! I do feel it would shine even brighter with some backing vocals…ooohs/aaaahs and some harmonies. I agree that the backing could be a bit more dynamic….it’s definitely worth doing aswell, cos it’s a lovely song! Congrats!😄🎶👊🏻🎶

[IronKnee]

Love the piano......just a beautiful rhythm.
             -T

[MonnoDB]

@bigFishAndTheSmallPondets  what a lovely song!!!

First impression is that the vocal (as you've noted) needs to be redone - it's riding hot I think.. but that's a minor thing. Your voice and the sentiment in the delivery are spot on so a recrecord with the right levels will sort that out quickly..

In summary - great song, great vox and playing .. needs a bit of work on the engineering front... so completely fixable .

LOVE IT!

K

[bigFishAndTheSmallPondets]

Love the piano......just a beautiful rhythm.
             -T

So glad you liked it @IronKnee. Thank you