[Sterix]

Not done much in the way of original songwriting so far this 2021. Mostly I've been tinkering with a bunch of already-written lyrics making up a wannabe musical, but it have written the odd new song (lyric). Including this one last night.

This is one of those songs that didn't start off with any theme - just started singing the first line and it built up from there. I only really got what it was actually about once I got to the chorus - realising the line about belonging in the depths of Hell  was narrowing my options severely and that I had to make the singer at least a bit of an a-hole... then thought, "sod it!", and turned him into a nasty, manipulative piece of work who had driven his other half to suicide (so if that's a raw subject you may want to skip reading further).

 Oh well, it's not as if I'm not known for writing dark lyrics.

I have got some vocals for this (there IS a tune) but the range is a little out of my comfort zone, at least without a large consumption of alcohol to loosen the old vocal chords!

One small note - the "pre-chorus" sounds more like a chorus with the "chorus" more like a "post-chorus"...

A
You know I think about you every day
You haunt me without mercy like a hunter stalks their prey
It's like you're watching from the shadows all the time
I turn around expecting you to be there by my side

B
This world is without mercy
It just will not let me heal
The will to live deserts me
There is nothing left but tears

Pre-chorus
I can't go on
Living in this empty shell
When I belong
In the very depths of Hell

Chorus
For what I did to you was cruel
I drove you to the edge, where you
Could not go on another minute by my side
I crushed your dreams and made you doubt
Until you saw just one way out
And now it's much too late to save you from my pride

Can't turn back time

A
I watched them lay your casket in the ground
And I felt their eyes burn in me like they knew the truth somehow
I felt my body start to tremble as I turned
My spirit and your body seemed entwined beneath the earth

B
The truth is like a poison
Working deep into my soul
I hear the mocking voice of
Accusation in full flow

Pre-chorus
I can't go on
Living in this empty shell
When I belong
In the very depths of Hell

Chorus
For what I did to you was cruel
I drove you to the edge where you
Could not go on another minute by my side
I crushed your dreams and made you doubt
Until you saw just one way out
And now it's much too late to save you from my pride

Can't turn back time
Oh no
Can't turn back time

Bridge
I just can't face the future
When I stole the one from yours
Is death the only cure or
Am I damned to live some more?

Pre-chorus
I can't go on
Living in this empty shell
When I belong
In the very depths of Hell

Chorus
For what I did to you was cruel
I drove you to the edge where you
Could not go on another minute by my side
I crushed your dreams and made you doubt
Until you saw just one way out
And now it's much too late to save you from my pride

Can't turn back time
Oh no
I want to turn back time

[MichaelA]

Very dramatic Sterix, had a bit of a Gothic feel to it somehow. Reminded me a bit of Wuthering Heights (the book, not song) where Heathcliffe digs up the dead Kathy’s grave so he can speak to her again.

The music would have to be very dark for this. 

[Vintage54]

Hello,
   I like nearly all of this. Apart from the third and fourth lines of the Pre chorus. Don't ask me why, can't really nail it, just sounds wrong somehow, a gut feeling i guess. Nonetheless, it deserves a reply.

                           Vintage54

[Neil C]

@Vintage54
Hi great to see you back on forum in these trying times, looking forward to some lyrics soon? :- Neil