konalavadome

No Time To Die (another one!)

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PaulyX

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« on: February 13, 2020, 10:36:45 PM »
A bit like Adam and Neil I wanted to get my 007 lyrics posted so that 1) I have to stop tweaking them and 2) I can’t be influenced by Billy Eilish. 😊 In fact I’ve already rewritten parts of this twice since you guys came up with really similar imagery ... didn’t want you to think I’d nicked your stuff!I  assure you that any similarities that remain are coincidental... I guess we’re all mining some familiar themes with this one. Anyway here ‘tis... think I’m heading towards a Matt Monroe style crooner.
Pauly


V1
The battle
Begins tonight
The future:
We’ve cut all ties.
The seducer
Duty’s tempting fate again
With the comfort of cold steel

V2
Am I winning
The frozen heart of my
Assassin
Is it a part of what you’re
Planning
To do when the night is through
Still the dawn’s so far away

CH
Are those kisses or just a double cross?
We’ll find out eventually
We both beat our demons so far
That’s not something they forget so easily
To all things a season
Ours is not to reason why
But you can tell it to my demons
This is no time to die

V3
There’s work that must be done
Debts that must be settled
If we don’t want to get stung
We must grasp the nettle
Love’s always been a loaded gun
The hammer cocked, cylinder spun
Now one of us must pull the trigger

CH2
But
In the kiss of each other’s cross hairs
We make our pact
We beat our demons so far
That’s how we know, we know that they’ll be back
To all things a season
Ours is not to reason why
But you can tell it to my demons
This is no time to die
It's all too beautiful.

adamfarr

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« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2020, 09:26:07 AM »
Highly intriguing - I really like the short lines in the verses (why can't I ever do this?!). The rhyme scheme has some nice unexpected surprises (future-seducer, assassin-planning etc. etc. etc.). And a nice absence of "die" rhymes. The "double cross" is a very PaulyX move that you can just read over or do a second take and go - aha!

Looks like a goodie.

PaulAds

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« Reply #2 on: February 14, 2020, 10:27:01 AM »
That's great...love the snappy lines in the verses. I love Matt Munro too...this is another one that looks like being a scorcher.
heart of stone, feet of clay, knob of butter

MichaelA

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« Reply #3 on: February 14, 2020, 10:43:55 AM »
Love the kiss/double cross chorus opener, plus the crosshair line. Very well crafted and atmospheric.
My latest novel: pls check it out!

‘Gavin & The Bodysnatchers’, a quirky comedy crime thriller. Easily found on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B09GZ7C8M7?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860

rightly

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« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2020, 12:46:39 PM »
Fascinating read I hope I get to hear it one day!
Wow.
It's either this or that, then again it might be the other. 

I can promise you a future of slow decline.

Don't eat the yellow snow

And there you have it. 

https://soundcloud.com/2rightly

https://soundcloud.com/rightly