[adamwolf]

This is a really sad song. I think it's self explanatory what it's about, maybe too self explanatory, and I know I should probably put some light in the dark but I haven't made up my mind yet.
This one is better quality to the other song I shared here (recording wise) because
my mic apparently had a limiter (didn't know when I bought it) and strumming and loud singing get distorted and since this one is quieter it worked fine on the mic, if anyone knows what I can do about that btw please tell me, I tried lowering the signal and amplifying it by using DAW but it didn't sound good, it sounded really low quality, and I have no idea what to do lol



Please use headphones when you listen.


-I was experimenting with an odd structure lyrically, did that work?
-I know it's bleak but is it good enough someone might wanna listen to it that it's worth balancing out the darkness with positive hopeful stuff?
-I don't know anything about singing but I feel like my voice wasn't bad here, just tell me feedback on how it was? Is it 'pleasant' to listen to? Am I singing in tune? Did the 'powerful' parts sound good and add dynamic?
-I wanna have more music in the back ground so it's suppose to be a little more than this, but as the core of a song, is it good or too boring? I can't write lead guitar but that's one of the things I had in mind
-I just wanna know what you thought it general :D

verse

I put my head down
knew there's nothing I could prove
looked at the window sill
heard a tune singing it'll be alright
you don't have to fight the waves tonight

chorus

I smiled and said I haven't lost all hope yet
last time we talked I struggled to take a breath
last time we talked i was wondering if today was the day
I reach the edge

verse


I woke up with chills down my spine
knew i no longer had anything to lose
drops of rain seeping in
watched it soak the songs i write
but i learned they proved nothing since that night

bridge

I touched the gun but didn't dare pull the trigger
I lied when I said I believed in something bigger
and I lied when I said I hadn't lost all hope yet
'cause I had nothing to lose and nothing left to protect

verse

I wondered if any one would care
I wondered if any one knew
i could no longer quiet my pain
had no friend through this fight
that I might be gone tonight

[Sebandme]

@adamwolf this is superb lyrically- imo this doesnt need any light keep it as dark as you can.  Personally the verses need a different melody to bring the rhyme s more in sync if thats makes sense. The chorus i really enjoyed. The Bridge is just pure poetry....loved it. Just the verse my only gripe. Great lyrics dude honestly.

[Sebandme]

@adamwolf  In terms of the verse this is what i meant

Listen to Untitled 1 by Sebastian And Me on #SoundCloud
https://soundcloud.com/sebastianandme/untitled-1

Obviously you have your chords this just was my own spin of it so i could give an example.

[rightly]

Lyrically
Yes it's a good ' un.
Listening now.
Y need to work on pronunciation n production, n listening closely, those clicks hurt.

If you can work a daw you can get something fine out of this song.
I like it, I like your voice too. Sentient thing, you.

I enjoyed the listen. If it matters to you, you should get busy with the technical side of things a bit more.
Or pay someone to do it for you.

All the best to you, buddy.

[adamwolf]

@Sebandme Thank you so much!
I don't know if I'm just too protective over the whole song it but I keep thinking that the melody of the verse thing is because I'm not the greatest singer so I can't bring across all the nuance of the melody I'm going for but I didn't realize the way it sounds also didn't let the rhymes show. I listened to your take on it and I really like it! I'm gonna experiment with it for a bit for sure but so far I couldn't get it sounding like it fits with everything else. I really appreciate you caring enough to help me make it better, and thanks again for your kind words about my lyrics

@Rightly Thanks! I'm glad you like my voice too! I definitely need to learn the basics of production but every time I try it feels like it's going no where. What do you mean my pronunciation though?

[rightly]

I just mean theres character to your voice
N that's a good thing.
It means I have to listen closely, n it is worth it.

If it's a bad, or rough production, any click too loud,or in the wrong place will be detrimental to the listening experience. The distraction can be really distracting.

This is a good song, I guess your capable of pulling out more quality songs.
The technical side of things is often a drag, often necessary.
I struggle with it too.
Good luck.

[Sebandme]

@adamwolf i wasnt trying to change your song or anything was just trying to give you an example of my explanation. Love those lyrics and the chorus is great. If you get the verse right i think it will be epic.

[pompeyjazz]

Hi @adamwolf I'm really enjoying listening to your songs. This is another well crafted song. I like your singing voice,  you seem to have a natural vibrato which makes your vocals very unique. Nice guitar work. With regard to the production stuff I'm sure that the majority on here will tell you that it's a bit of a learning curve but there's loads of help out there on the Internet and on here  It would be interesting to know what DAW you are using and a bit of an overview of your recording setup. Another very enjoyable listen and I think that you have great potential so keep it up man !

[cowparsleyman]

@adamwolf - Man you have something special.. I just dig your tentative playing, the vocal delivery and the vibe.

This one is better quality to the other song I shared here (recording wise) because
my mic apparently had a limiter (didn't know when I bought it) and strumming and loud singing get distorted and since this one is quieter it worked fine on the mic, if anyone knows what I can do about that btw please tell me, I tried lowering the signal and amplifying it by using DAW but it didn't sound good, it sounded really low quality, and I have no idea what to do lol



Please use headphones when you listen.


-I was experimenting with an odd structure lyrically, did that work? - Definitely worked
-I know it's bleak but is it good enough someone might wanna listen to it that it's worth balancing out the darkness with positive hopeful stuff? OK
-I don't know anything about singing but I feel like my voice wasn't bad here, just tell me feedback on how it was? Is it 'pleasant' to listen to? Am I singing in tune? Did the 'powerful' parts sound good and add dynamic?Mosty was in tune, some notes a little off focus, dynamics were good
-I wanna have more music in the back ground so it's suppose to be a little more than this, but as the core of a song, is it good or too boring? I can't write lead guitar but that's one of the things I had in mind Yes, it did get a little predictable, but I'm sure that can be resolved tastefully - a good song is recognisable even through poor production/cheap instruments etc.
-I just wanna know what you thought it general   Pretty impressed with what you do, I'm not sure whether more instruments would be the right thing

[PaulyX]

Hey Adam, nice track.  For me the best thing about it is its rawness - it does feel like someone is confiding in the listener, baring their soul a bit.  The intimacy of the vocals add to that.  You could polish and add to it for sure, clean it up a bit... but then again the raw production is part of the current charm of it.  The structure worked for me as it is just as much a poem as a song to my ears.

[Binladeda]

 Hey Adam,

 Yep....liked this .  Plenty of character and 'off piste'...which was nice . (haven't been there for a while)

 Your vocal is fine, don't worry about that.  A few 'wayward' notes, but nothing to worry about.  I like the vulnerability and
 rawness of the whole piece. 'twas captivating.  I liked the percussive approach to the guitar playing.  It worked really well
 as an accompaniment to the vocal.

 I'm not a lyricist, so I can't comment on that, and I'm a bit deaf, so I can't comment on production etc.  But, as a 'sonic
 experience' for me.....it was most enjoyable

 

[adamwolf]

@Rightly  I understand and I'll definitely put more work into learning production a big now that everyone is giving me a boost of confidence, thank you!

@Sebandme yeah I was trying to experiment with what I think you meant from your clip on soundcould to see what I could come up with. I still haven't figured it out but I'm definitely trying to change the melody, thanks again for your kind words about the lyrics.

@pompeyjazz Thank you! I wouldn't call it a recording setup lol I just have a samson meteor mic which can't handle how loud I sing and strum on most of my songs so I thought I'd use it since this one is quieter. I tried using FL studio but it seemed to complicated and I tried Audacity but it was just annoying lol so I use this pretty basic thing called Mixpad Audio Mixer.
I don't have the skills to try to make more than one track so my priority is just knowing how to use this mic with louder volumes, there's a blue light on it when it's turned on and it turns purple whenever the signal is too loud for it to handle and that's what happens whenever I start strumming and even if I try to bring it closer to my mouth than the guitar and when I listen to it over it's completely distorted. If you have any ideas tell me. Thanks for the 'you have potential' comment

@cowparsleyman Thanks!

@PaulyX Yeah this wouldn't work without the raw feel, I'm glad all of it came across, thank you

@Binladeda Thank you

[pompeyjazz]

Hi @adamwolf I appreciate your comments regarding FL studio and Audacity and yes they can be annoying and frustrating but to be honest it is really worth investing a bit of time to get your head round the whole DAW thing, it really is, otherwise you're going to be stuck there with your blue and purple flashing lights. You have some really good songs and unless you have someone to do all the tech stuff for you you're going to have to make some kind of steps in that direction. Anyway that's just my experience 

[CaliaMoko]

I'm just stopping in to support what everyone else is saying. Especially about the raw sound suiting the lyric so well. I am conflicted a bit, as what I'm hearing sounds to me like you are (a) a little nervous while singing, (b) trying to sing very quietly, (c) singing in a too-low area of your vocal register and/or any combination of the three. I say I am conflicted because I believe it is the quality created by these things that give it the "raw" feeling. On the other hand, I do like a more polished sound, so I find myself looking for that while I listen. I suspect, if you polished it up, I might find I prefer the original. I don't know. I would like to hear how you sound in a higher key and singing with a little more power, just to see.

I am barely functional on a DAW, so I can't help you with that part. I often struggle with getting enough sound without causing distortion. I keep the input as low as possible and--whenever I can--give it to someone else to finish production. That's my solution.