The Rain Lyrics

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Nicolajane87

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« on: August 07, 2019, 01:14:24 PM »
Hi Its been a while since I've been on here, wrote these lyrics give me any feedback thanks.


The Rain

Sometimes life can knock you down,
Your whole world crashes to the ground,
You feel like no hope can be found,
But i know things can turn around.
You will make it through the storm,
Find a way to carry on,
Just keep holding on and stay strong.

Through all the hurt and pain,
These dark clouds will fade away,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain,
There's no need to be afraid,
Everything will be okay,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain.

Whenever you feel all alone,
Don't hesitate to call my phone,
You know i'll be right there for you,
Your darkest days I'll comfort you.
You will make it through the storm,
Find a way to carry on,
Just keep holding on and stay strong.

Through all the hurt and pain,
These dark clouds will fade away,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain,
There's no need to be afraid,
Everything will be okay,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain.

These dark clouds will fade away,
You can make it through the rain,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain.

Through all the hurt and pain,
These dark clouds will fade away,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain,
There's no need to be afraid,
Everything will be okay,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain.

You can make it through the rain,
You can make it through the rain,
The sun will shine again,
You can make it through the rain.


CaliaMoko

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« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2019, 11:17:16 PM »
I can absolutely hear this lyric in a song. I might consider a couple changes. Well, one, maybe:

Third line: maybe "You're certain no hope can be found".

I really like this a lot. Will you be setting it to music? I very much want to hear it!

Vicki

Nicolajane87

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« Reply #2 on: August 09, 2019, 01:54:44 PM »
Hi CaliaMoko

Thanks for your feedback, I haven't got any music for it at the moment but i have sang it and put it on sound-cloud, i would like to put music to it but its difficult when you cant play any instruments.

CaliaMoko

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« Reply #3 on: August 09, 2019, 03:54:44 PM »
So, my first immediate recommendation is to learn to play an instrument. Piano is an ideal first instrument, if you can find a teacher you can afford, because the theory is reinforced graphically by the keyboard and becomes so much more easily transferable to any other instrument. However, learning to strum chords on a guitar can be done without learning to read music, so it's fast. I learned piano and theory first, so I can't speak to this method, but many members on the forum can play pretty good guitar and don't know how to read music, so I know it can be done. Officially, I don't recommend this approach, but if you're in a hurry...well....

Second, I went to your SoundCloud account to listen to your musical interpretation of your lyric. You chose a minor key, which could be suitable, since you're speaking to someone who has suffered some kind of setback. But you could also consider using a major key, since your message is that everything will be okay. Another option would be to have verses in a minor key and move to a major sound for the choruses.

As I said earlier, I don't have much to recommend for your lyric, but I do have a recommendation for your melody (besides the major/minor comments). At present it is extremely repetitive. I would try to provide more variety. It's especially effective to use a contrasting melody for your chorus to make it stand out.

Also, you need a hook. You named it "The Rain", so maybe that could be your hook. If so, it needs to rise above the rest of the melody, so when someone thinks of this song, they immediately think of that part.

Sorry...I've gotten sidetracked here. I should be talking about the lyric, not the melody. Looking at the lyric again, I believe I'd like to see something in the chorus that makes it different from the verse. And you have done that to some extent, as the verses are 7 lines and the chorus is 8. An additional idea might be to change the rhythm a bit for the chorus. Longer (or shorter) lines, maybe.

Oh, here's something else. Yeah, the more I look at it and think, the more I notice. :D  What message do you want to push with your lyric? You named it "The Rain". Is that what you want us to focus on? After reading the lyric, I get the impression your message is more positive than that. I think you should consider making your message reflect in your title and your hook. Like "The Sun Will Shine". Because that's what you want us to get from this, right? That, even though things are bad, the sun IS going to shine eventually. So put your spotlight on that. You could make the title "The Sun Will Shine" and you can put the focus of the melody, the hook riff or whatever it's called, on that phrase: "The sun will shine".

Okay, I think that's all I have at the moment. I'm intrigued, though, and I think I will notate your melody and see if I can do something more with it. ;)

Vicki