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I Don't Want to Intrude

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jacksimmons:
I have had this one floating around for a while but have decided it will be the basis for my next album so recently remixed it and did some tweaks. I am aiming for a more organic and natural sound at the moment so playing around with first-takes, not overly quantizing things and leaving in little imperfections. hopefully I haven't gone too far.

This is another love song, I am afraid.



Lyrics:
the day I saw your lips in the café mirror
people told me you were feeling pretty low
I didn't want to intrude
Help me shake the snow from my hair
Show me there are people that still care about my hair

Save me from the spider on the wall
And I'll save you from the shadows in the hall
Tell me everything you wanna do
I'll give you ten years
I don't want to intrude

I'm not the same when you're around
Little melancholy me gets left behind
Never looked up to see the sky
without the arrogance to ask why
it didn't suit me that day

Save me from the spider on the wall
And I'll save you from the shadows in the hall
Tell me everything you wanna do
I'll give you ten years
I don't want to intrude

Andreas:
This is good! First off you have a fabulous voice and the vocal melody is perfect throughout the song. I like the guitar on this one :) The lyrics are also good, and they tell a great love story.

Nice job on this! :) 

PaulyX:
I really really like the incidental details in your lyrics mate.  I always do.  But here especially... the snow in the hair, the spider in the hall... just ace, they give clues to a much wider story than 3 minutes would normally permit.  The line "I'll give you 10 years" really made me think too...  is the narrator cynically saying the relationship will not last forever?  Or saying that their partner could talk for 10 years and they'd still be listening?  Either way, cool line.  Great the way the bass comes in near the end, and excellent vocal delivery.  Only the first line felt very rushed / unintelligable to me... could you thin some words out?  Lose "The day I..."?  That's my only nit - very nice, folk-tinged, charming track.

Bill Saunders:
The guitar rhythm reminded me of Johnny Marr round about the Queen is Dead era. Your voice on this is outrageous! It makes it a memorable and original listen. I get the organic thing, but I think the vocals could do with a pitching tweak in just one or two places.

The song itself is excellent - really enjoyed it!

shadowfax:
Lovely song..great singing, reckon the harmonies could've come in earlier though, fab lyrics..just fab!! not sure about leaving mistakes in a song though...although nothing stood out as wrong in this track.. :) :)

best, Kevin :)

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