konalavadome

Masterpiece - advice on instrumentation

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Martinswede

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« on: January 18, 2019, 06:21:56 PM »
Hi!

This is a song that I wrote about two years ago, but I haven't felt like starting recording it till now.
It's the eternal theme, but this song is mostly inspired by a person I met who was absolutely wonderful, but I just didn't fall in love. But the other 95% of the song is just a general mix of experiences.

Anyway. I'm thinking a Dylan ballad style of arrangement but I need help with drum arrangement. If I keep it really simple I can probably just sit with pads and midi for five hours but... What are your suggestions? Right now the tempo is 80-87 bpm but I'll settle on a fixed value.

https://soundcloud.com/k-martin-j/masterpiece-work-in-progress

Masterpiece

From the other side of the room you were looking towards me
Making sure I still understood what's important 'round here

The beauty of how your body speaks
Is a language I've learned to read

Don't need it any brighter I can clearly see
But it would help if you stood a bit closer
 
And it feels like you've learned them just for me
Words to tell what you seek

I never needed anyone but now I need to heal
The stitches are torn the wound is open now, you made it real
Can't say I've learned so much I guess I didn't make the right mistakes
Just some finishing touches and then the masterpiece is made

You claimed me though there was no such a need
As far as I know I'm not going anywhere

You picked me up from where I was left to bleed
And turned my doubt into some sort of belief

No high or mighty was to come to your aid
You found yourself stuck with the mess that others made

ch.

Thanks,
Martin

I love the smell of Donald Sutherland in the morning

hardtwistmusic

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« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2019, 05:46:20 AM »
For me personally, I could not hear any need for drums. 

I found the song (and performance) "Dylanish" but not "Dylanesque."  What I felt kept it from being "Dylanesque" was the lack of a very short, very memorable refrain with a really strong hook throughout.  I feel that such a short, memorable, "hooky" refrain would really put this over the top. 
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Martinswede

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« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2019, 07:03:07 AM »
Hi!

I agree that a 16 bar chorus is a bit too long, I think I'll work on it a bit making it shorter and more powerful.

I listened to 'Oh my sweet Carolina' by Ryan Adams just now to look at the arr. It's partly just acoustic but it builds up with piano and then drums and bass, harmony and organ at the chorus. I like that.

I'll keep working on it and probably have a basic arr in a month or so.

Thank you for your comment,
Martin
I love the smell of Donald Sutherland in the morning

Wicked Deeds

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« Reply #3 on: January 19, 2019, 08:46:56 AM »
@ Martinswede, Nicely recorded.  I think more instruments are needed to help differentiate between different sections of this song. I would add drums because that will be the start of this process. Thereafter, it's easy to add a number of different instruments to colour the sections of your song. If your serious about adding drums, drop me. a OM and I will provide some at the appropriate tempo.

Paul
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cowparsleyman

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« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2019, 09:39:27 AM »
god morgon @Martinswede - Lovely song,  to be honest I like it as it is, simple just words, guitar and passion.

maybe try another take with a smattering more passion in the Voice, but that's just a very small thing, as you have a lot of words and just 1 gtr, the dynamics have to come from either of these, the Gtr isn't doing it, so it has to be the voice, and once you know where the passion is, then a re take on the Gtr to match it, would give it another dimension Martin.

Maybe some BVox that's all, Oh yes and a hint of plate verb on the LVox, I was hearing quite a bit of compression on the Guitar, but that might be the compression of SC and/or mp3s or even my Apple earpods.

personally don't think it needs clear verse/chr boundaries, as the words carries me through it without them, the more instruments you have the more the boundaries are clearer, I think this works better without that.

btw. never was a Dylan fan, there's one or two of his that I do like, but I think this is as good as Him..

Hope this helps



 

 


Rightly

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« Reply #5 on: March 10, 2019, 10:17:36 AM »
This is sketchy. I felt some warm nostalgia from my own Dylan days   
I suggest you stick with that Dylan touch here.
I think there are enough ideas here for a good song. Still some bold move should be made at some point to tie end those loose ends. 
It's either this or that, then again it might be the other. 

And there you have it. 

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Martinswede

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« Reply #6 on: March 10, 2019, 01:02:40 PM »
Hi!

Thanks for the comments. You both have some good advice. I posted it here because I think the doesn't have that much character and kind of just keeps going.

Yes the guitar is a bit too compressed. I cheated and lined it so it was the best option I could think of to avoid the coming and going of the original sound.

I think I'll let this song rest a while and maybe record it with piano when I've gotten better at playing it.

Martin
I love the smell of Donald Sutherland in the morning

Younger Hills

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« Reply #7 on: March 14, 2019, 06:29:45 PM »
I hear a lot of Dylan in this and in your voice for that matters. Both Dylan and Ryan Adams are using harmonica often during the breaks, and this is a tune where a harmonica could have fitted nicely in. You tell a great story with this song, but maybe as others have mentioned a more powerful hook, would have sold the song more in. But I really liked the feeling I got listening to this song and your voice, so just keep at it :) Nice work man!
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Martinswede

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« Reply #8 on: March 18, 2019, 05:09:04 PM »
@Younger Hills
Thank you! Yes, harmonica might add some sweet singer/songwriter/country-feel to it.

/Martin
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Skub

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« Reply #9 on: March 18, 2019, 10:17:47 PM »
It's a sweet song Martin. It works as it is,or you could develop things. I hear many possibilities.

A while back I used to fret about the development of a song,then I realised,there can be many different versions. Nothing is set in stone,so I'm much more relaxed about the process these days.

You could do a bigger production version as well as an 'unplugged' edition. That's one of the beauties of a DAW.  :)
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Martinswede

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« Reply #10 on: March 20, 2019, 10:55:29 AM »
Thank you Skub!

I'm getting more and more confident with making drum tracks. It has opened up a lot of possibilities.
Recording is much easier, more time to try different options.

Martin
I love the smell of Donald Sutherland in the morning