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DAKOTA

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SFX

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« on: January 13, 2019, 09:51:55 PM »
It was dead of winter when I saw you crossing my path like a meteor

That's when my mind went crazy and to this day it gets no easier

Then you came closer, overdoser, and now I'm struggling to breathe

But your breathe in my mouth, on my skin, activates the animal in me

 

Ding dong Dakota

Revvin' me up like a Toyota

Gosh dang Dakota

Gonna make me pop my cork like a soda

Hot damn Dakota

Really really fillin' up my  fuckin' quota

My sweet little Dakota

Givin' me some dirty thoughts- lemma show ya

 

Eyes of fiery lamentation makin' me wanna go dancing in the acid rain

So cute but you got that kick like butter dripping down my dirty face

Lips as scarlet as your tousled hair and my heavy beating booming heart

I don't know whether I wanna rip you in two or I wanna be ripped apart

 

Ding dong Dakota

Revvin' me up like a Toyota

Gosh dang Dakota

Gonna make me pop my cork like a soda

Hot damn Dakota

Really really fillin' up my  fuckin' quota

My sweet little Dakota

Givin' me some dirty thoughts- lemma show ya

 

Come on Dante, let's get nasty in this burning circle of Hell

Ooh al dente, feed me plenty, even if it's hard to swallow

Don't want dirty, don't want flirty, just want you anyway I can have

Up and down or round and round, in the front and in the back

 

Ding dong Dakota

Revvin' me up like a Toyota

Gosh dang Dakota

Gonna make me pop my cork like a soda

Hot damn Dakota

Really really fillin' up my  fuckin' quota

My sweet little Dakota

Givin' me some dirty thoughts- lemma show ya

 

 

hardtwistmusic

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« Reply #1 on: January 14, 2019, 06:37:27 PM »
Let me suggest the following format changes to make this easier to follow the "rhythmic flow" of. 
This did not "look" like a lyric, but when I broke it down like this, it sang easily and well. 

It was dead of winter when I saw you   --   crossing my path like a meteor

That's when my mind went crazy     --    and to this day it gets no easier

Then you came closer, overdoser,       --   and now I'm struggling to breathe

But your breathe in my mouth, on my skin,    --    activates the animal in me

 

Ding dong Dakota

Revvin' me up like a Toyota

Gosh dang Dakota

Gonna make me pop my cork like a soda

Hot damn Dakota

Really really fillin' up my  fuckin' quota

My sweet little Dakota

Givin' me some dirty thoughts- lemma show ya

 

Eyes of fiery lamentation    --    makin' me  wanna go dancing in the acid rain

So cute but you got that kick like    --   butter dripping down my dirty face

Lips as scarlet as your tousled hair   --   and my heavy beating booming heart

I don't know whether I wanna rip you in two   --   or I wanna be ripped apart

 

Ding dong Dakota

Revvin' me up like a Toyota

Gosh dang Dakota

Gonna make me pop my cork like a soda

Hot damn Dakota

Really really fillin' up my  fuckin' quota

My sweet little Dakota

Givin' me some dirty thoughts- lemma show ya

 

Come on Dante, let's get nasty   --   in this burning circle of Hell

Ooh al dente, feed me plenty,   --    even if it's hard to swallow

Don't want dirty, don't want flirty,   ---   just want you anyway I can have

Up and down or round and round,   --   in the front and in the back

 

Ding dong Dakota

Revvin' me up like a Toyota

Gosh dang Dakota

Gonna make me pop my cork like a soda

Hot damn Dakota

Really really fillin' up my  fuckin' quota

My sweet little Dakota

Givin' me some dirty thoughts- lemma show ya

When we are trying to review a lyric.... the smaller you can break down the components for us, the more likely we are to get your (rhythmic) flow, and thus the point of your lyric.  They are small things, but the dashes indicating separation REALLY help us to understand your rhythm.  I may not have gotten all of them in the places you intend, but the point is, if you want us to understand what you do intend, break it down for us.
« Last Edit: January 14, 2019, 06:41:48 PM by hardtwistmusic »
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