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Finally

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Mutrins

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« on: January 03, 2019, 12:14:45 PM »
Hey guys!

Would love to get some feedback on this track. Posted it a couple of months ago but didn't get any responses so I thought I might give it another go. This song is about doing everything you can to win the heart of the one you love. I wanted to give it a sort of 1950s/60s vibe. The lyrics and overall vibe is also supposed to be sort of cheeky.
Thanks so much!
Micky

https://soundcloud.com/micky-shiloah/finally-10-18-b

Lyrics:
Waking up
Waking up
Finally see mine
Finally see mine

Waking up
Waking up
Finally realize
Finally realize

I've got the power right in my hands
To bake a better pie
Built it out of scratch and make it taste right
I've got the power right in my hands
To make a better life
Add a little sweet and make it just right

Chorus:
Now that I'm here
Do you wanna be my baby?
(Do you wanna be my baby?)
Now that I'm clear
I can see me with you baby
(I can see me with you baby)

Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I really hope you do now)
Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I put in all this time for you)
Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I really hope you do now)
Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I put in all this time for you)

Stepping up
Stepping up
Putting on a tie
Rush hour by 9

Stepping up
Stepping up
Exercise
Every day at least three miles

I've got the power right in my feet
To make my strides
Picking up the pace to the finish line

I've got the power right in my feet
To make a better life
Add a little speed to the finish line

Chorus:
Now that I'm here
Do you wanna be my baby?
(Do you wanna be mine?)
Now that I'm clear
I can see me with you baby
(I can see you as mine)

I did everything you wanted me to do
I did everything you wanted me to do

Bridge:
I did everything right
I did everything right
Got a job and a car and a dog and a meal plan
Shaun T five times a week
I swear, I did everything right
I did everything right
Still in some debt, but mostly gone
I don't understand what else is wrong?

I did everything right
I did everything right
Is it still not good enough?
Still not good enough?

I did everything right
I swear I did everything right
I really did everything right

I did this all for you
Now, do you wanna be my baby?
I really got my shit together
Just like you wanted
(I can see me with you baby)

Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I really hope you do now)
Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I put in all this time for you)
Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?
(I really hope you do now)
Do you see me see me
see me see me see me
see me see me with you?

I did everything you wanted me to do
I did everything you wanted me to do


Yodasdad

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« Reply #1 on: January 03, 2019, 10:09:21 PM »
Love the rich vocal textures that you layer up in your tracks and they are particularly evident here.

Up to date with nice clear production. I think you've blended the modern and the retro very well hear.

Some great vocal hooks.

I can imagine it being a bit too sickly for some people but I enjoyed it.

Very catchy.

Yodasdad

Paulski

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« Reply #2 on: January 04, 2019, 02:13:02 AM »
Hi Micky
All your stuff sounds so radio-ready and modern.
Love the vox and the harmonies.
Hooky as all get out.  :D :D
Maybe a tad long - but a pleasure from start to finish.

Paul

Mutrins

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« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2019, 11:54:30 PM »
Love the rich vocal textures that you layer up in your tracks and they are particularly evident here.

Up to date with nice clear production. I think you've blended the modern and the retro very well hear.

Some great vocal hooks.

I can imagine it being a bit too sickly for some people but I enjoyed it.

Very catchy.

Yodasdad


Thank you so much!!

Mutrins

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« Reply #4 on: January 05, 2019, 11:54:45 PM »
Hi Micky
All your stuff sounds so radio-ready and modern.
Love the vox and the harmonies.
Hooky as all get out.  :D :D
Maybe a tad long - but a pleasure from start to finish.

Paul

Thank you, Paul!!

cowparsleyman

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« Reply #5 on: January 06, 2019, 09:02:16 AM »
Whato @Mutrins - Really nice tune, nicely executed, quite a bit of work in this...

I got the cheeky 50/60's vibe of the lyrics, not easy to pull that off, and you nailed it.

To my ears the only thing missing was a break from the theme, a bridge section, that would have made it superb.

Regards

Rich

RealKevM

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« Reply #6 on: January 06, 2019, 02:46:58 PM »
Really commercial and contemporary, you've done a good job.

fischermans

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« Reply #7 on: January 07, 2019, 06:46:33 AM »
Wow very radio friendly as the others said. I like your voice. Very well done, only thing I don't like are the spoken parts but for sure this is only me.
Alexander
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tboswell

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« Reply #8 on: January 07, 2019, 12:07:06 PM »
Glossy and ready to release sound as always. Very tight production work, especially on the vocals.

Lyrically didn't really like the line about "baking a better pie". Because it was the first verse I thought is this a baking song? Took me out of the song for a second.
Amazing work on finishing those vocals tho.

Really listenable stuff.   ;)

Skub

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« Reply #9 on: January 07, 2019, 06:32:43 PM »
A very shiny,quality and production led track. I'd not be in the slightest surprised to hear this on daytime radio.

I can't help but appreciate the work done on the whole track,there's nothing I could pick holes in,though didn't personally like the 'voice over' part. Just me,I'd say.

A fine piece of work.
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Mutrins

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« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2019, 10:44:26 PM »
@cowparsleyman Thank you so much!! And a bridge section is a good idea. Thanks!!

@RealKevM Thank you, sir!

@fischermans Thank you!!

@tboswell thank you!! and haha the bake a better pie line is kinda random but then I grew to like it. It was just filler at first but I decided to keep it lol

@Skub Thank you!!

montydog

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« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2019, 02:46:48 PM »
Hi,

Great textures, great hook, clever lyrics, very polished in all departments and even some lovely harmonies. This is really something which I can imagine has considerable commercial potential. Very impressive - a major talent. It's a little too long - maybe take it down to 3:30.

M

Mutrins

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« Reply #12 on: January 12, 2019, 11:30:43 AM »
Hi,

Great textures, great hook, clever lyrics, very polished in all departments and even some lovely harmonies. This is really something which I can imagine has considerable commercial potential. Very impressive - a major talent. It's a little too long - maybe take it down to 3:30.

M

Thank you so much @montydog !!