[LostBoy]

Hi everyone,

Just finished this one, all thoughts are welcome and useful to me please.  As usual produced on my iPad, apps used if interested were: Auria pro (daw), Cubasis for the drums, SynthMaster player, korg IM1, korvpressor, fabfilter proQ2 and convolution reverb.

https://soundcloud.com/leo-b-5/astronaut

Lyrics
Space isn’t for me
It’s cold and not for the lonely
And there’s not much to do
But watch love disappear from view...

It was one small step for her
(One small step for her)
One giant leap from my arms
I’d do anything for her
Even if it hurts
Though it’s alien to me
The space that’s in between
But I can’t let her go
So I wait up in the stars
Hoping there might be a chance
til the gravity of it all
Brings a hopeless astronaut back to earth.

Waiting for contact
Inside I’m bracing for impact
Cos times ticking away
And silence is so loud in space...

[CaliaMoko]

For me this works really well. I love the way you worked in "small step" and "giant leap". The spacy sound effects, I thought, were well chosen and well placed. Not that I'm an expert, but I know what I like.

I love the near rhymes that support the unstable theme (like her/hurts, me/between, all/astronaut...that last one especially...I didn't list them all).

And I love the melody. Seems to me I generally like your melodies.

No nits from me.

[tboswell]

Lots to love, and I love it! Really nice spacey atmosphere throughout the whole thing and a sharp lyric that brings in all the space concepts.
A really solid write and a great production job.

Feel you missed a trick at the line "And silence is so loud in space...", in not having a little gap of silence before the chorus comes back in.
Surely you have to add that!?

Really great stuff tho, really great!
 

[pompeyjazz]

I love songs about space me Leo. Don't really know why. I guess I was a very impressional age when I watched the moon landings. I really like this one. Even more than the Sky lanterns song and that is top quality. I just love the ambience that you have conjured up and the light and shade.The lyrics are very well constructed and thought out as well. Top song man 

[RealKevM]

Really like your voice dude. Nice song.

[Jambrains]

Ouch, that one sucked pretty bad!

No, just kidding, you already now I think this is fab Leo, just wanted to say it out loud in public  :-)

[cowparsleyman]

@LostBoy - Nice work, great lyrics, I LOVE the very subtle bits, 1:35 heart beats for example, like the IR verb, very sweet.

Vocal work is sublime (were there some popping p's on the LVox?)

I could just imagine a radio voice on just one line, just to give a hook, followed by maybe one of those beeps they used...

also maybe a sampled apollo moonshot astronauts in the 2:50 section, right in thr background....might work?

just an idea.

Can imagine this in the charts.

Hope this helps

cpm

[LostBoy]

@CaliaMoko Aww..thanks Vicki. I’m glad you like it so much.

@tboswell Thanks so much Tom. Damn! U are right about the silence b4 the chorus thing. I actually did not think about that, which is weird, cos we spend soooo much time thinking about these songs that it’s hard to believe we’d miss something like that. I did put the heart beats around then to kind of emphasise that. (haha! That’s me beatboxing in the car one lunch break!  ) I do know I was VERY conscious of the length of the track, trimming the fat, as right now it’s coming in at 4.09, I ideally wanted it to be under 4mins.
Thanks for your support mate.

@pompeyjazz Hey dude, thanks for your feedback as always. I’m glad I didn’t ruin space for ya!! Haha!! 

@cowparsleyman Thanks so much for your thoughtful feedback. U are right, I did miss some poppy “p’s” in the bridge and thanks to you I have fixed those now.
You are right about some additional “astronaut talking sfx” maybe working. Truth is, I recorded me talking and did all the usual tricks to make it sound like I’m calling from space, but I couldn’t decide if it was just a little “cringe!” so I ultimately left it out, might still play with the idea though.
Cheers man! 

[Binladeda]

 Hey Leo 

 Yep...another cracker Excellent Intro, love the feel/atmosphere, just like I was floating around out there
 Excellent melody, really REALLY loved the vocal and the harmonies  . 

 Looking forward to seeing you at the O2, being supported by JB .  Can I get on the guest list 

 Excellent work old chap.....as usual

[cowparsleyman]

Whato Lostboy

I know what you mean, it can get a bit cringey if over used, I've always sampled those one off ideas/things, your'e right there is no substitute for the real thing, and I've always found it sounds awful to try and a complete waste of time. Another option is to reach out to an American (prefereably a Texan) on the forum and get them to do it, but again you have to fiddle about with all the 'usual tricks'

Again you are right, don't over use it, just a hint works, like the really cool heartbeat, way back in the mix

Anyway great work LB.

[redrhodie]

Clever lyrics, beautifully sung love lost song. I don't have any suggestions, it sounds just right. Pretty and sad.

[montydog]

Hi Leo,

Great vocal, clever lyrics with all the moon/space references and a sophisticated melody. I liked the spacey feel you've manged to achieve - impressive. This has a very polished feel - commercial and radio friendly.

Envy is a terrible thing.

Lovely thing indeed.

M

[LostBoy]

@Binladeda Thanks so much mate!! That’s all very kind of ya. The O2??? 🤣 naaaah...that’s really not for me, my dream is for a song of mine to be sung by an artist in such a venue...with everyone belting it out with them!! That’s the dream right there!

@redrhodie thanks very much as always for your positive feedback mate!

@montydog You are too kind mate! I’m glad u like it so much...you have nothing to envy me for...u are a kick ass songwriter!!!😄👍🏻

[Cawproductions]

Hi Leo,

Bit late to the party with this, really nice, read through the lyrics, very clever. Sung really well too.

Top work

Andy

[tfz]

Really, really liked this. Wonderful song, great lyrics and what a voice. Love space themed songs, and this is right up there. Love it.