[adamfarr]

That thing where you meet someone way out of your league and say, ah just go with it, even though you know you'll feel like the Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event in the morning...

METEOR

V1
You burst into the room
Like a frigate's crew
Rocking my quiet saloon

V2
I stopped fast in my tracks
Like a silent lamb
Sensing a wolf’s attack

V3
Words my trusty defence
Didn’t dare expect
Your warmth upon my neck

PRE-CH1
Tonight I'll devour the oyster
In the morning I'll be an empty shell
Tonight happy as an elevator
In the morning broken in the stairwell

CH
So tomorrow you’ll be gone
Because you'll still be
The meteor, the meteor
So tomorrow I'd love prefer
To be the bird that's unconcerned shaken not stirred
But yet again I'll probably be
The dinosaur, the dinosaur

V4
Your hair perfumed my night
Balmy bunches of a life
That didn’t quite seem like mine

PRE-CH2
Tonight we pop bottle top stars
In the morning rattling in the garbage
Tonight kissing happy as a beer bubble
In the morning just a damp puddle

CH


(c) Adam Farr, 2018, all rights reserved

[hardtwistmusic]

A lot of interesting elements here.  I absolutely LOVE the three line verses.  So different, but it clearly works here.   

I also love the three consecutive verses that this starts off with.  Are "threes" a sort of theme that I haven't caught on to yet? 

Loved the "shaken not stirred" and Dinosaur lines.  Didn't entirely get them, but they struck a chord in my subconscious that makes me want to figure them out.  I think that's a really good strategy in writing.   I do "get them" on an emotional level -- "smooth and suave" versus "extinct."  Nice comparison. 

There is a lot to like here.

[adamfarr]

Thanks Verlon - I kind of decided to be clear but not too obvious here - that everything should still make sense but if you don't know that the non-avian dinosaurs were wiped out by an asteroid then that shouldn't matter.
Let's see!

[hardtwistmusic]

Thanks Verlon - I kind of decided to be clear but not too obvious here - that everything should still make sense but if you don't know that the non-avian dinosaurs were wiped out by an asteroid then that shouldn't matter.
Let's see!

Now that you point it out, I can't believe I missed that connection. . . but I did miss it.  Now it all makes such perfect sense that I'm embarrassed to have not put it together.