[Jamie]

Hi all, this is a collaboration with the help of Katie W's lyrics. It took a while to get there, but....... Bit of social commentary.  I did make some minor amendments to the lyrics to fit my patterns, but I hope I've stayed faithful to the original words!
As usual any constructive crits welcome!
Cheers
Jamie
https://soundcloud.com/jamie1802/one-of-these-days

There's some yobs, living down the road
They're giving all the OAP's Lots of grief
One of them's a liar another a thief
They're giving all the other kids, lots of grief

Pre chorus

What you doing about it
What you doing about it
What you gonna do about it
Repeated

There's alway glass on the walkways of the flats
Nobody leaves their keys under their mats
All the old ladies huddle as they talk
They'll all chain their doors around four o'clock

Pre chorus

Chorus
I think I'm going out of my mind
One of these days you'll push me to the line
One of these days you'll make me snap
One of these days I'm gonna push you back

Theres the police parked outside their door
They look so cozy with their cups of tea
It makes me seethe, it makes me mad
Coz I know next week will be just a bad

Pre chorus

Chorus

[montydog]

Hi guys,

I'm currently working on a collab with some lyrics by Katie and now I'm really scared that I'm not going to be able to get anywhere near as good as this. The lyrics sum up the situation perfectly with just a few simple phrases. The musical setting is lovely and a perfect foil for your warm, yearning vocals. I really loved this but I'm worried now :-(

M

[PaulAds]

Silky smooth groove all the way. Lovely vocals with thoughtful sympathetic treatment.

Some really good lines in here and paints a sombre picture of life for many modern Britain 

Great to listen to something smoother after all of that 169bpm drum challenge madness

[Jamie]

Hi all, thanks for listening!

I've been away and wasn't aware of the drum beat challenge, so I'm pleased to offer an alternative sound .

Hi Alan,Don't worry, it'll all be fine! I often feel that way when I listen to some of the really talented people on this forum! Pleased you enjoyed it, it was quite easy to write with the thoughtful lyrics from Katie, I just wasn't sure if it was a bit to 'laid back ' for the subject. thanks for the kind comments!

Hi Paul, glad I could bring an antidote to the drum track challenge, I've listened to some of them and it's amazing how many interpretations there were. Great imaginations round here! Thanks for the great review, loving the smooth groove comment, sounds like it should be in a lyric !

Cheers
Jamie

[Skub]

Yo Jamie.

It's great to hear your Dulcet tones once more! Like a cool beer on a sunny day. 

The chorus has an 'Arnold Lane' feel to it. (Old Pink Floyd with Syd) Funnily enough,the song title is a Floyd song too! 

For me,this is impossible not to like. Great music,fine lyrics from Katie and your smooth vocals.

Love it. 

[LostBoy]

I really like this one Jamie! The awesome lyrics paint a great (or not so great ) picture and I love your chord progression, especially in the verses. Lovely vocal melodies/delivery. I especially like the ooooohs in the later choruses, lovely little touch that. I actually love the laid back style you’ve gone for, I think it works a treat!

Yep! I loved it, very catchy! Great job dude! 

[Jamie]

Hi guys, thanks for the feedback, it's appreciated!

Hi Skub, thanks for your effusive words,a cool beer is always welcome!Yes I did think twice about the title as it's a favourite
Floyd song of mine, but I decided it worked best of the options .

Hi LostBoy, I felt the style should somehow counterpoint with the subject so went for the laid back feel on purpose. The chord progression in the verse is actually a very simple one,just played on unusual places on the neck which I think gives it a bit of a different vibe (but what do I know ).

Cheers
guys glad you enjoyed it!

Jamie

[Jambrains]

This was way cool! Strange thing is I get a very strong grunge feel from this track, with a different performance it would surely give Soundgarden et. al. a run for the money but don't get me wrong, it is great as is. Only think I personally did now like that much was the bass guitar that had too much 'plink' at too little 'oompf' to really support the track well but other than that the mix sounds fine. At one point or two I get the feeling that the key may be just a tad high? Anyway, lots to enjoy here, thanks for sharing!

[Jamie]

Hi JB, I'm intrigued by the grunge/soundgarden comments, always interesting to get another perspective! I did use a bit of EQ to get the bass guitar out of the vocal frequencies so I don't know if that points to your comments about the bass? Glad you enjoyed it though!
Cheers
Jamie

[Paulski]

Hi Jamie
Well you came back with a splash!
Loved this one - good take on the lyrics - esp. really like the prechorus? - lyrically and chordally 
Now it's stuck in my  inner ear "What ya doin about it?"
Won't sleep tonight with that worm in there 
Great collab!
Paul

[Jamie]

Hi Paul, great to hear from you, glad you enjoyed it! Sorry about the ear worm . Pleased I was able to compliment the lyrics that was important to me!
Cheers and thanks for listening.
Jamie

[nooms]

lovely vocals jamie
observations and scenes in the lyric really strong kate
rises and lifts in the song work beautifully

[Jamie]

Hi Nooms, always look forward to your comments as I admire your stuff so much (end of sucking up! ). Glad you enjoyed it, I thought I might get comments on the length of the song, as I almost always go on, and on and on............. . Katie's ;lyrics inspired me to go the 'softer' route. These lyrics shouted out for a 'rocky' take. As usual I went the other way
Thanks for listening!
Cheers
Jamie