[redrhodie]

Hi guys,

I started working on this and it's just kinda stalled. Maybe it's done? I'm not sure. Would appreciate your feedback.

Listen to The Good Life by faraway my lovely #np on #SoundCloud
https://soundcloud.com/user-468459034/the-good-life


The Good Life

Take me home again
I want to see the tree I used to climb
Take me home again
My mother's hanging wash out on the line
Her tomatoes are growing on the vine
The dogs are all sleeping in the sunshine

My father's coming home
Pulls his car into the driveway
His name's there on his shirt
His hair is shiny from the pomade
His hands are all dirty from a hard day
But he lifts me up and I know that
We're all okay

After supper time
We all have a piece of cherry pie
The sun is setting soon
It's getting lower in the sky
I know it won't be too long until she cries
But right now we're living
The good life

[Darren1664]

Hi Lynn

Nice to hear an acoustic from you (not that you haven't done them before, just haven't heard any of them myself). I like the simplicity of the arrangement and the melodies and harmonies are lovely. It's sunny here today and I think this song is a sunny song. For me it works as it is but could use a little extra something...some percussion like a tambourine or something? but nothing much...

I like the lyrics - they're a little bitter sweet. They do well to paint the picture of the good life (which is nice and sweet) but certain lines let us in on the sadness, the song doesn't give too much away but enough that we have an awareness more is going on here.

I think it's a lovely song and a great write.

Darren

[Ramshackles]

Hi
I think its got potential. I would work on the acoustic guitar part a bit - perhaps a more pronounced rhythm with some breaks in it (somehow) to add some variation to the song.
Towards the end you introduce some la las which is a nice hook I think...perhaps you can push this a bit more?

[redrhodie]

Thanks Darren. I've been thinking about getting a tambourine. I will try that out for sure.

Thanks Ramshackles. I just got the acoustic guitar right before I recorded this. I've only played electric until now, so it's a new sound for me. Thanks for your ears! I will try to change up the rhythm some and see about doing more with the bvox.

Thanks again,
Lynn

[rightly]

Lots of potential here
I really like the harmonies - I've never tried that myself but I've recently been thinking about trying it out.
the melody and voice is lovely too.

I don't know how you might improve it but I'd like to hear it as a finished song.

[Johnnyuk]

Hi,
I agree with what others are saying. Your song has a lot of potential.
At this early demo stage I would consider taking the song up a full tone maybe, experiment with a full tone up, or even higher as i think that once you do this your vocal will hit it's sweet spot. You will know if you are in your sweet spot vocally when you sing over the new key because it will feel/be easier for you to sing.
As it is now the key that you are in imo is too low for your voice.
I hope this helps.

Johnny

[redrhodie]

Thanks Rightly. I have a lot of fun singing harmonies. I'll think about adding more. I'm really glad you think it has potential. I'll keep working on it.

Thanks Johnny. That's very helpful. I'll try it up another tone.

[Cazrolina]

This is fantastic. A reeeeally great song. Atmospheric, dreamy, psychadelic and really cool. Great lyrics and fab performance.
Tambourine, or a light cymbol. Yes. (There's even a hint of a tambourine ghost in it already in places.) You could use it to help to build the song up to that last verse/ch, you could even stick in an understated snare and bass appearing on 'she cries' if you wanted to highlight that line, and through to the ending.   
I doesn't need anything else adding vocals or instrumentation wise. Everything is working really really nicely together. And those harmonies/backing etc are awesome.
Loved it. cx

[redrhodie]

Thanks so much Caz! I appreciate all the kind words and thoughts. Love the idea of highlighting the "she cries" line with bass. I still haven't gotten a tambourine, but that is definitely coming.

Thanks again,
Lynn