konalavadome
×
Login
Remember me
Toggle navigation
Guest
Login
Register
Home
Login
Register
The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum
Lyrics
That bloody War.
« previous
next »
Print
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
That bloody War.
7 Replies
1141 Views
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
Vintage54
Platinum Album
Posts: 746
That bloody War.
«
on:
November 18, 2017, 07:26:33 PM »
That bloody war.
I need a fix
But the man's not showed up yet
It's the only thing
That helps me to forget
Once i was clean
Clean and dry as a desert flat
But the war
That bloody war put paid to that
I used to run
Run every day around the block
I was strong
Now i push wheels or do the hop
Two legs went marching
But only one came back
That war
That bloody war took care of that
There's a wall in Washington
That throws your image back
Pause a while there Mr President
Before you plan your next attack
This house had love
And the smell of sweet perfume
A woman's touch
A vase of flowers in every room
Her colored scarf
Used to hang beside my hat
But the war
That bloody war put paid to that
I'd call my friend
But i know that he's not home
He's just a ghost
A dead number in my phone
I can't leave a message
And he can't answer back
That war
That bloody war took care of that
Will it be the same old story
Different singer same old song
There's guts but there's no glory
When the war you wage is wrong
I'm so tired
But i'm afraid to go to sleep
One time ago
My dreams they used to be so sweet
I never rode a nightmare
I could sleep like any cat
But the war
That bloody war put paid to that
There's a wall in Washington
That throws your image back
Pause a while there Mr President
Before you plan your next attack.
Vintage54
Logged
Neil C
Stadium Tour
Posts: 3970
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #1 on:
November 20, 2017, 11:29:58 PM »
Vintage,
Nothing really needs to be said to those lyrics..
But I have to... regarding the last verse. There's a talented US songwriter
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darden_Smith
who I've had the privilege to have been taught by who founded Songrwriting for Soldiers programme in the US. This provides songwriting retreats for vets, and from what I heard its the mental scars that are often the hardest to deal with.
neil
Logged
songwriter of no repute..
2tuoo
Open Mic
Posts: 190
Feelings are for faces and paper
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #2 on:
November 21, 2017, 12:55:54 PM »
Super intense!
I'm not sure why but this line :
Quote
That helps me to forget
feels like the "to" is unnecessary there
the emotion in this song is very clear, great delivery!
Logged
Have a great day!
Paulski
Stadium Tour
Posts: 4418
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #3 on:
November 21, 2017, 08:52:58 PM »
Well there Vintage - you've wordsmithed another poignant and solid lyric
You put us in the uncomfortable position of this guy's headspace and we begrudgingly learn from the visit. Damn you for sending us down such pathways of hardship. And bless you for it as well for it's thankfully the closest thing we'll have to living them.
Paul
Logged
click here to hear my songs
click here to watch my videos
tomcrocus
Solo Gig
Posts: 459
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #4 on:
November 23, 2017, 06:18:56 PM »
Hi Vintage,
i see you're still churning them out,it's perfect and very poignant,
i love it all but especially the 4th and 5th verses,
best wishes,
Tom.
Logged
finestrat
Guest
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #5 on:
November 27, 2017, 09:22:23 AM »
Powerful lyrics well structured - fantastic
Logged
hardtwistmusic
Stadium Tour
Posts: 3037
Central Oregon Sunset
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #6 on:
December 09, 2017, 05:57:58 AM »
For the longest time, meaningful songs were taboo. I think (given the economic and political climate) they will be back soon. You're (hopefully) only a little ahead of time.
Logged
www.reverbnation.com/hardtwistmusicsongwriter
Verlon Gates - 60 plus years old.
lillypilly
Open Mic
Posts: 180
Re: That bloody War.
«
Reply #7 on:
December 09, 2017, 08:49:14 PM »
WOW
Logged
Print
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
« previous
next »