[SFX]

First draft of a new song, would love your feedback

KING COBRA

Limbs wrapped around you like a python
Speaking in dark tongues with the lights on
You’re giving me a different kind of poison
Firing rounds at me like an overexcited shotgun
(it’s trigger-nometry baby)

Holy Hell, Heavens above
The way you slip and slide in this tunnel of love
Just give it all to me, I want it all baby
I can’t breathe baby
You’re a goer, you’re a boa
You’re constricting me

And when the bulb blows and you think that it’s over
Just gotta run for cover when I stroke your King Cobra

You’re making me feel so goddamn dirty
Tongue on my spine, own wetback safari
(safari so good)
And as I writhe on the floor so silently
I know you’re a predator and I’m dead meat

Pain and pleasure, viable venom
You know just what needs to be done
Poking holes through me, got a chokehold on me
I need to scream baby
Bigger and badder, you’re an adder
Put your forked tongue right through me

You got a penchant for risk and overexposure
But that ain’t nothing when I stroke your King Cobra

You could shoot me dead with a single glance
You could make me crumble with one touch of your hand
Just come on and give me a kiss
My pretty little basilisk
This is no petting zoo, do what you came to do
I got seams for you to rip

And when you go off track on this rollercoaster
Baby that’s just the start when I stroke your King Cobra

[2tuoo]

My English is weak today,
is this an erotic song?

What style of music is it going to be?

[Jackdaw]

First draft of a new song, would love your feedback

KING COBRA

Limbs wrapped around you like a python
Speaking in dark tongues with the lights on
You’re giving me a different kind of poison
Firing rounds at me like an overexcited shotgun
(it’s trigger-nometry baby)

Holy Hell, Heavens above
The way you slip and slide in this tunnel of love
Just give it all to me, I want it all baby
I can’t breathe baby
You’re a goer, you’re a boa
You’re constricting me

And when the bulb blows and you think that it’s over
Just gotta run for cover when I stroke your King Cobra

You’re making me feel so goddamn dirty
Tongue on my spine, own wetback safari
(safari so good)
And as I writhe on the floor so silently
I know you’re a predator and I’m dead meat

Pain and pleasure, viable venom
You know just what needs to be done
Poking holes through me, got a chokehold on me
I need to scream baby
Badder and badder, you’re an adder
Put your forked tongue right through me

You got a penchant for risk and overexposure
But that ain’t nothing when I stroke your King Cobra

You could shoot me dead with a single glance
You could make me crumble with one touch of your hand
Just come on and give me a kiss
My pretty little basilisk
This is no petting zoo, do what you came to do
I got seams for you to rip

And when you go off track on this rollercoaster
Baby that’s just the start when I stroke your King Cobra

Fantabulous lyrics and useage of words associated with snakes.
Well done SFX!!!

Maybe consider expanding it a little more by adding...
Bite
Antidote
Cleopatra n Asp
Ecdysis - shedding skin
etc etc etc

Jackdaw :-)

Shake or Snake RATTLE n Roll!!!

Ps...
Instead of the line " Badder Badder etc etc"
How about...
Snakes n Ladder
You're an Adder?

[Vintage54]

    Howdy,
      The only thing i can say about this is, what a fantastic ejaculation of words. This is top notch writing, so many good lines, i love it. Don't tinker, don't change a thing, this is right on the money. I was almost pointing to the sky.

                             Damn good
                                  Vintage54

[Paulski]

Kinky as a twisted telephone cord 
I'm with Vintage (well I'm not actually WITH Vintage  ) and I say - don't touch it anymore 
You too Vintage!

[rightly]

This is steamy!
I really like the word play
Imagery is good too
I've no complaints here
It stays on course, I like it.

Well written.