A new song massive writers block need a little help

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JackyBeat

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« on: September 30, 2017, 03:07:29 PM »
Hey there   8)

Okay so i've always wanted to write a song, i did a little something a while ago with the help of someone on here, it wasnt great.

So back story of the song i have in mind, i just want to write some lyrics for it really, never been good with melodys or finishing it up good I over rhyme and such but the back story is met a guy and we're dating now but its going so fast and we not been together that long but we're using words like love and such already and neither of us can explain why other than sometimes you just know, sometimes you just meet a person and you just connect with them so much you just know it doesn't need any more explanation than that.

But I cant get this one line out of my head singing it to myself

"My one, my unexplainable love"

So that's what I would call the song "unexplainable love" but other than it being unexplainable I don't really know what to write about, i want it to be a slow but slightly up beat song but i don't wanna be sloppy either I just want to write how he makes me happy and how I don't want it to end, how I've never felt this way, how meeting some of his family already was great and I felt accepted. I wanna include all of that but don't really know how to put it into words.

Ideas?  ???

Thanks in advance, unsure if this is the right section of the forum for this, if not move please mods  :)

PopTodd

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« Reply #1 on: September 30, 2017, 04:13:21 PM »
Maybe make it about how abusive the person is, but you can't help loving them.

Or, if that's too dark...

You've never really met this person or had a much of a conversation with them, but something about their spirit reaches out to you.

Or, if that's too stalker-y...

Maybe you are in love with a good friend's partner?

JackyBeat

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« Reply #2 on: September 30, 2017, 09:15:14 PM »
Maybe make it about how abusive the person is, but you can't help loving them.

Or, if that's too dark...

You've never really met this person or had a much of a conversation with them, but something about their spirit reaches out to you.

Or, if that's too stalker-y...

Maybe you are in love with a good friend's partner?

Yeah none of this is about how I explained how i wanted it to be so i dunno where you got that from.

tone

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« Reply #3 on: September 30, 2017, 09:29:23 PM »
Yeah none of this is about how I explained how i wanted it to be so i dunno where you got that from.
You forgot to say 'thanks'

Someone just took time out of their day to read your thread and offer a suggestion. You're new to writing, so the suggestions of other, more experienced writers ought to carry more value for you.

Songwriting isn't always about telling the story as it happened, because sometimes life is boring, or there are no interesting and original ways to say what you're going through. So adding a twist here and there often makes for a better, more listenable song.
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JackyBeat

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« Reply #4 on: September 30, 2017, 10:47:20 PM »
Yeah, none of this is about how I explained how I wanted it to be so I dunno where you got that from.
You forgot to say 'thanks'

Someone just took time out of their day to read your thread and offer a suggestion. You're new to writing, so the suggestions of other, more experienced writers ought to carry more value for you.

Songwriting isn't always about telling the story as it happened, because sometimes life is boring, or there are no interesting and original ways to say what you're going through. So adding a twist here and there often makes for a better, more listenable song.

Nah i didn't not really cause I thought I explained enough how it's a love song but I didn't wanna be overly sloppy about it and he suggested me writing about it like it was abusive or its a friends partner the only good thing about what he suggested was the part "You've never really met this person or had a much of a conversation with them, but something about their spirit reaches out to you." but even still that doesn't really fit it either and in my post I didn't say anything that would give any of those vibes so i don't know where that's come from what so ever.

It's not that I don't value the suggestion because I do but it just had nothing to do with what I asked. like I said love song that I'm writing for someone to show to them I cant write about any of that stuff. It's a song to show to someone as an expression of how I'm feeling in lyrics form even though it's unexplainable, haven't known him that long or been together for very long but I know it's true love and the feelings I feel are real i just cant describe it but i want to put that into a song.
« Last Edit: September 30, 2017, 10:52:29 PM by JackyBeat »

tone

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« Reply #5 on: September 30, 2017, 10:53:18 PM »
What's with the attitude?
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JackyBeat

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« Reply #6 on: September 30, 2017, 11:55:04 PM »
What's with the attitude?
There isnt one just frustrated that people dont read the whole thing then "suggest" something completely different to what i asked

tone

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« Reply #7 on: October 01, 2017, 09:55:36 AM »
You're new here and I really want to give you the benefit of the doubt. But I assure you, Todd read the whole post. He's been a member for a while, he's a good guy, and a talented writer. He took time out to make suggestions. No-one expects you to pretend like his suggestions if they're not what you're looking for. But showing disdain for his contribution is extremely poor manners.

If you don't want to contribute to the community in a constructive way, I'll be happy to remove your posting privileges.
« Last Edit: October 01, 2017, 11:06:38 AM by tone »
New EP: Straitjacket - Listen here

1st track from my upcoming album -- Click to listen -- Thanks!

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rightly

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« Reply #8 on: October 01, 2017, 12:03:51 PM »
You're new here and I really want to give you the benefit of the doubt. But I assure you, Todd read the whole post. He's been a member for a while, he's a good guy, and a talented writer. He took time out to make suggestions. No-one expects you to pretend like his suggestions if they're not what you're looking for. But showing disdain for his contribution is extremely poor manners.

If you don't want to contribute to the community in a constructive way, I'll be happy to remove your posting privileges.

well said Tone.

newcomers often appear with strange attitudes.
to some extent it can be understood.
songwriting is often a solitary process and when hunting for a solution to a block or other such problem patience can be in short supply.
Some degree of friction is almost inevitable. It's a tough one.
It's either this or that, then again it might be the other. 

I can promise you a future of slow decline.

Don't eat the yellow snow

And there you have it. 

https://soundcloud.com/2rightly

https://soundcloud.com/rightly

Boydie

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« Reply #9 on: October 01, 2017, 01:54:10 PM »
Unfortunately after a friendly warning and discussion via PM I have had to remove JACKYBEAT from the forum

This is always a last resort - I will not be sharing the private discussion but I hope you trust me that I had no option
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Oldbutyet

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« Reply #10 on: October 01, 2017, 09:04:45 PM »
Really sorry to read how your thread and membership here ended because i do think you have a good idea for your lyric/song and i really do like your title "unexplainable love"

Just have a few ideas and suggestions that i had intended to post that might help give you some ideas about getting started on your lyric and if you're still reading this then hopefully it might help.

Sometimes when writing lyrics and you can't come up with anything that will get the flow of words going then its best to write down your idea for your lyrics which you have done on your first post, then read back and see if you can find something in there that will give you a few lyric lines just to get you started, also in this early stage when starting off with lyric lines they don't really have to rhyme its just to get words down in some kind of lyric form and when that's done then you can go back later and change whatever needs to be change.

Okay what i see in your first post and remember this is just to get something written in lyric form and first of as i said i like your title "unexplainable love" im thinking that might sound/read great coming in as the last line in some or maybe even all of your verses, maybe something like this again taken from your idea.

met a guy and we're dating now
its going so fast but it feels so right
neither of us can explain this
unexplainable love

Okay im going to leave it at that because you know best what you want from your idea and those four lyric lines is just to try and explain another way of finding lyrics, change or keep they're all your words.

Never give up on writing and remember, there're other songwriting forum, good luck and enjoy.