[Neil C]

Hi,
With due reference to Steely Dan's Donald Fagens untimely death and spurred on by PaulyX superb 'Ludo drove the van' here's my latest.

its a bit wordy on occasions and whilst the lyrics do appear to fit,  I'd really appreciate any suggestions and feedback on these. Many thanks.

 
neil

Continental divorce

You’d say it was a strange relationship
You’d never put us together
Married in good faith, it was a real embrace

So what went so wrong? Don't look at me
Our common interests were hard to see
We slowly grew apart, we need a brand new start

With heavy head and a broken heart
With disbelief and an easy grief, we know we don't belong

So the ship has sailed for you and me
It’s listing, it’s heaving and we’re all at sea
All aboard the lifeboats or ignoring the reports?
We’re heading for a messy continental divorce

You can't find a new life when you’re still stuck in the past
And you can't move on and nothing ever lasts
The silly thing is that its all gone
We’ll all be poorer, it won't be long

Coz it’s who pays for this and who pays for that?
We’re finding there’s no welcome on the welcome mat
Too busy slinging insults and character assignations
Which court will rule on our separation?
 
Coz there is no good outcome when we’re fighting in the yard
And both of us will loose, will lose the very prize

So the ship has sailed for you and me
It’s listing, it’s heaving and we’re all at sea
All aboard the lifeboats or ignoring the reports?
We’re heading for a messy continental divorce

C N Connor 2017

[diademgrove]

Hi Neil,

I like the way you've approached Brexit, very original. I'm not keen on the word continental, to me it doesn't have an everyday meaning and can only really apply to Brexit. The difficulty is finding something to replace it with.

For the same reason I don't like the word court. That is easier to replace with judge. It could be are we going to get a hanging judge for the divorce or equally a judge from the European Court.

Feel free to ignore me if you disagree.

Keith

[redrhodie]

Well, I'm not sure if it's because I'm an American, but I didn't know it was about Brexit until I read Keith's post. Haha. Now that I know, I agree with him that the word Continental is possibly not the best choice.

Contentious, maybe works.

[Mizz A Mind]

I can put aside my political alignment to commend this as something quite genuine and mournful for a historical unity that was forged around the single most black and white combat between good and evil in recent history. An initially simple idea with which no-one can disagree. That we should never allow a force like the Nazis to rise again.

But of course, as you say, “We slowly grew apart, we need a brand new start.” Thinking on it more, I do quite like the metaphor of marriage and divorce. People can be head over heels for eachother as little as even five years ago, but despise one-another after that time simply because times and people change.

If I had one criticism, and this isn’t to insert my own beliefs, but I think that you should also infer some fault on the part of the E.U. Again, all of the positive reflections on the unity, and acknowledging that the “divorce” will be sad and difficult is great. Those things are perfectly valid and quite refreshing.

But using those points exclusively rather makes it seem as if the Brexit is happening for no good reason at all. As if the U.K. rather just felt like it, when of course, to go through with this “divorce,” clearly something has made the U.K. very discontented with the partnership. You don’t have to agree with it, just acknowledge it. You can be sad that mum and dad broke up, but still be supportive and understanding. Put it in quotation marks from the U.K. if it makes you more comfortable.

You can be quite vague if you want, borrowing from your metaphor of marriage. Allude to “selfishness,” or feeling “suffocated by your total control.” To touch on immigration without ruffling any feathers, you could even say “I’ve been worn ragged by the things you desire.”

One line is all it needs and it’ll make the lyrics seem that much smarter and nuanced. But that’s just my opinion.

[PaulyX]

Thanks for the reference mate!
I thought this read very well, it didn't feel like you were finger-pointing and it felt balanced, just that you were sad and reflective about the outcome.
I guess whether you keep 'continental' or not depends on how explicitly you want people to know it is about Brexit.  Remove that word and it could just be about any normal divorce, which maybe widens the appeal but perhaps makes it less thought provoking as the metaphor would be lost on many listeners.  If it were me I think I'd be inclined to lose the word from the title but keep it in the lyrics themselves, so it is a bit less labelled as an obvious Brexit song but most people will still make the connection when it gets to that point in the lyrics.
Looking forward to hearing it with music behind it... I can already hear your voice fitting this well.

[Neil C]

Keith,
Pleased you liked the concept, I'm working pretty hard to up my game on the lyric front.
And yes whilst I have a strong view I was tried to be balanced and reflective. Regarding the use of the word Continental, I don't know but to me it does have an everyday meaning, but event if it didn't I'm not sure its a reason not to use it. I'm I dont hear Haitian used often. but I do appreciate your feedback, it make me think harder about what I've done which is really helpful.   
 
Redrhodle,

Hi, hgood to meet you and thanks for reading and commenting. I'm glad you got it. And whilst its political much of the lyrics are relevant to personal divorces I'm afraid.

Miss a mind

Hello, nice to meet you too and cheers for feedback. re 'infer some fault' and there are fault on both sides IMO in one days it doesn't matter. There is a choice about how we go about Brexit and I guess I'm commenting on that its a pity that we can't divorce nicely. Too much money and politics involved. They should both think about the citizens - which are analogous to the kids in the divorce.....   
 
PaulyX,

Yes intent is to be overt about the subject. Its my 4th divorce song, and yet I'm still happily married when I last looked Music coming on a treat I hope

  neil

[PaulAds]

Great, Neil!

This is another brilliant way of looking at it...I didn't have any problem with the word "continental" though I thought "continental drift" might have been an idea for the hook (?)

I enjoyed the lyric a lot and loved the way it seems to suggest that it could be more complicated than the lazy and simplistic identity politics driven squabble that it appears to have descended into.

[Wicked Deeds]

Your best lyrics I think Neil. well done my friend!

Paul

[rightly]

difficult topic and you seem to have managed it well.
certainty is in the audio though.

I'd love to be able to write more political songs.

[Neil C]

Well thanks for the feedback.

PaulAds, agree. Just like actual divorce it take two to separate and its never clear cut, and people takes sides. I know a few divorces which are amicable and reasonable, but they seem to be the exception. Brexit ain't one of those. It all comes down to £, politics and ego's, whereas they should be trying to get the best deal for all the people of Europe. Fat chance of that..

Wicked, thank you kindly for those words, even if I don't agree its a lovely complement

Rightly, cheers, yes the proof will be in the eating/listening of the audio,  which is in development. You should have a go at writing something more political if you're inclined. I think you've either got to go head on if that's your style ( a bit like the Clash would ) or take more observational or allegorical approach.
 
neil