Click the Thumb (and Tell Me that You Like Me)
Early in the morning glued to my computer screen,
(Beep beep beep beep, beeb beeb beeb beeb)
Halfway between yawning and stifling a silent scream.
Just last night I posted on the internet,
(Beep beep beep beep, beeb beeb beeb beeb)
I couldn’t help but notice nothing’s happened yet.
I don’t want your commitment and I won’t be chatty
All I want’s a cyber kiss-me-quick
But with a single finger you could make me happy
And all it takes is just a little click.
So, why don’t you …
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Share my post and say you’ll be my friend,
Leave a comment please but leave it nicely
(And I’m sorry if my politics offend.)
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Your lack of empathy could send me round the bend,
So click the thumb and like me,
Or to put it less politely:
Though I might not like you either let’s pretend.
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Marvel at the minutiae of my life,
That picture of your dog might not excite me,
But here’s some underwear I bought the wife,
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Show me yours, I’ll show you mine as well.
Click the thumb and like me
Or unfriend me just to spite me,
Click the thumb or you can go to hell!
Is there anybody out there finds my post appealing?
Or in cyberspace can no-one hear me scream?
It’s just I’ve got the urge to splurge my deepest feelings,
But since we’ve never met I’ll keep it clean.
Oh, why don’t you …
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Don’t you think my thought is quite profound,
Click the thumb and that would quite delight me,
Then I can send you all the other crap I’ve found,
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Let me be a stalker in your home,
Click the thumb and like me
Or I’ll send you my spam nightly
But click the thumb and I’ll leave you alone.
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Laugh at every witty, loony verse.
Click the thumb to show me there just might be
Some love left in this shitty universe,
Click the thumb and tell me that you like me,
Or this misery will never end
So Obi Wan Kenobi
Gimme a Star Wars themed emoji
Tweet me wight on Twitter
(Hashtag: it’s not that I’m bitter)
Like me and I bet
That we can break the internet,
Sure I could feign some class
And pour champagne upon my arse
My very soul’s survival
Hangs on making this go viral
Click the thumb and like me
Cyber-cupid I’m your psyche
Click the thumb and like me
In pyjamas or your nightie,
Click the thumb or else-e
I’ll send you a naked selfie,
Click the thumb and say you’ll be my friend!
