[Jenna]

First of all group collaboration project has been try and tested on these songwriter forums in the past and has never amount to anything worth talking about, i mean group collaboration, but we're going to put that where it belongs for the moment might need it later as a cocktail drink, a hangover cure  

You already have experience replying so thats a great start, put your lyrics together dont have to be in order of rules and whatever, just lay them out so we can all see whatever flow takes us.

Gorilla fart, is that a hangover cure or just the end of the night playing piano    sounds like a great end to a party    okay i wont mention the fridge no more    you got room for us all Jenna    

 

We are fully stocked down to the bags of ice and corn nuts. Plenty of room. Bring your tent and sleeping bag - but no promises on breakfast. I'm sure there will be plenty of gorilla farts to go around in the morning competing with the neighborhood lawn mowers and weed whackers. For a hangover cure, you're on your own, sorry to say. I've never found a remedy, although I've not tried the local menudo. I hear it's the best cure there is.

Would it be acceptable to edit the lyrics in the OP as I/we go along? There's always a first time for everything, to use a well-worn cliche.

This what I've got so far:

I'm picking up a new old habit
And chilling it on ice
Spinning vinyl memories
At a bar named Fool's Paradise

Since you left I've been
half-baked out of my mind
Filling up this vacancy
With every liquid I can find

(pick up pace to party tune)

They call it Southern Comfort
It starts after eight
For every man or woman around
Who comes by to nurse their pain

They serve up Painkillers, Fireballs and Rum Swizzles
Topping them off with, Little splashes and a drizzles
Rumor has it you've moved on, and left our love behind
But I'm still dancing every night
With every other women in town.

When Johnnie Walker comes in he sits right down
Orders Jim Beam to pour another round
Then he lets out a Rebel Yell
It echoes all around Heaven Hill

The Prince of Wales rolls in with the Ruby Dutchess
On Moscow Mules with Rattlesnakes and White Russians
Trailing behind we get a London fog
That fills up Paradise with Salty dogs

Damn the Weather yells out Tom Collins
I'd rather have it Dark 'n Stormy sipping Long Islands
Hugging girls in bikinis chugging Appletinis
Enjoying the Sea Breeze with some Sex on the Beach.

[Binladeda]

 Hey guys,

 Am I to presume that the gig is on then
 If so, here's a link that you should be able to download, so you
 can sing along to in the car

 https://soundcloud.com/binladeda/spin-the-bottle/s-8U5TP 

 I think the lyrics and the music are a good fit, and that either can easily
 be made to fit the other.  Have you got a vocalist yet ??  I see that as the
 next step.  Ideally, you need someone who can sing 'in character', to do it
 justice.  There are two guys in the forum who immediately spring to mind,
 Paulski and Skub. There are probably others, but those are the two that I
 know can pull it off.  But if you already have one, let me know and I'll
 send the stems.

 We would also need someone who can mix/produce etc. Once the lyrics are in
 place, I'm more than happy to send more options/ammunition.  I've tagged a
 bit of lead on the end just to see what it sounds like.  I think some slide guitar
 would work very well with this.

 Anyway, let me know your thoughts guys.
 We're already two thirds of the way there

[Jenna]

Very good suggestions, Binladeda. I have no vocalist in mind but can hear a melody coming together so I could try to get a rough outline of a guide vocal down if needed. The backing track is a blast. I was hoping to start it off slow and sad like the lyrics with proper country "woe is me" intro then morph into a big party. It might be a good place to introduce the slide guitar.

I'm wondering if we should have Jack Daniels setting off a Redneck Prairie Fire at the end with his next day Gorilla Farts from the Canadian Club/Jungle Juice combo. Nah. That's probably too crass.  They just go together so well.

[Oldbutyet]

 Hey guys,

 Am I to presume that the gig is on then
 If so, here's a link that you should be able to download, so you
 can sing along to in the car

 https://soundcloud.com/binladeda/spin-the-bottle/s-8U5TP 

 I think the lyrics and the music are a good fit, and that either can easily
 be made to fit the other.  Have you got a vocalist yet ??  I see that as the
 next step.  Ideally, you need someone who can sing 'in character', to do it
 justice.  There are two guys in the forum who immediately spring to mind,
 Paulski and Skub. There are probably others, but those are the two that I
 know can pull it off.  But if you already have one, let me know and I'll
 send the stems.

 We would also need someone who can mix/produce etc. Once the lyrics are in
 place, I'm more than happy to send more options/ammunition.  I've tagged a
 bit of lead on the end just to see what it sounds like.  I think some slide guitar
 would work very well with this.

 Anyway, let me know your thoughts guys.
 We're already two thirds of the way there

Sounding good Bin, wasn't to sure of your earlier link Darren threw a curve ball into the pot but hey Darren perfectly understandable, Verlon writes great lyrics and i should know, really looking forward to hearing your style go for it man   

Bin great suggestion there with Paulski and Skub and im sure with all these cocktails on the table, more will come     kind of reminds me of that Field of Dreams movie.

Lets make this happen   

[hardtwistmusic]

Just to be clear where we are at. . .

Binladeda has written a backing track (which sounds to me like it fits perfectly) and offered to sing in the lyric to said backing track.  (I'm sure he wrote the backing track, less sure he offered to sing in the lyric to it.) 

Jenna has no problem (and has expressed her support for) Binladeda to do so. 

Sooooo....  if I have this right, we are at a point of successful collaboration. 

Am I reading all this correctly? 

Just trying to make sure we are all on the same page.  I'm a little bit pumped over this.

[Jenna]

Yes. Very good. Obviously, still working out the lyrics. I'm throwing everything out there to see what sticks. The current sketch is as follows:

I'm picking up a new old habit
And chilling it on ice
Spinning vinyl memories
At a bar named Fool's Paradise

Since you left I have been
half-baked out of my mind
Filling up this vacancy
With every liquid I can find

(pick up pace to party tune)

They call it Southern Comfort
It starts after eight
For every man or woman around
Who comes by to nurse their pain

They serve up Painkillers,
Fireballs and Rum Swizzles
Topping them off with,
Little splashes and a drizzles

I don't need you any more
To have a good time
I'm still dancing every night
With every women I can find.

Here in Paradise Johnnie Walker sits down
Orders Jim Beam to pour another round
Then he lets out a Rebel Yell
So loud it echoes all around Heaven Hill

The Prince of Wales rolls in with the Ruby Dutchess
On Moscow Mules with Rattlesnakes and White Russians
Trailing behind we get a London fog
That fills up Paradise with Salty dogs

Shortly after his Royal Arrival
The Brokeback shooter needs a Corpse Reviver
He rains Hellfire on his Royal Highness
With a Silver Bullet threatening to make him a Flatliner

Listen Mr. Rich and Rare, hand over the Royal Crown
Or I'll Smash this Gunfire into your Dewar's Scotch
Instead of prancing like the Incredible Hulk
You'll be howling Bloody Mary holding your . . . Wehelll

They serve up Painkillers,
Fireballs and Rum Swizzles
Topping them off with,
Little splashes and a drizzles

Rumor has it you've moved on,
and left our love behind
But I'm still dancing every night
With every women I can find.


Alternate sketches:

Damn the Weather yells out Tom Collins
I'd rather have it Dark 'n Stormy sipping Long Islands
Hugging girls in bikinis chugging Appletinis
Enjoying the Sea Breeze with some Sex on the Beach.

Jack Daniels
Fireball
Gorilla Fart
Redneck Prairie Fire

Harveywallbanger
Hanky-panky
Pink Lady
Angel Face
Fuzzy navel
Earthquake
Mudslide
Amber moon
Between the sheets


I don't know how anybody else would feel about this, but to get some of the oddball things in that pair up well, how would a little spoken outro that fades out? Kind of like the next day town gossip . . .

"Say, whatever happened to Harry Wallbanger last night?" "I heard he went off for some hanky-panky with that Pink Lady with the Angel Face. You know, the one with the fuzzy navel?"

[Jenna]

Just to be clear where we are at. . .

Binladeda has written a backing track (which sounds to me like it fits perfectly) and offered to sing in the lyric to said backing track.  (I'm sure he wrote the backing track, less sure he offered to sing in the lyric to it.)  

Jenna has no problem (and has expressed her support for) Binladeda to do so.  

Sooooo....  if I have this right, we are at a point of successful collaboration.  

Am I reading all this correctly?  

Just trying to make sure we are all on the same page.  I'm a little bit pumped over this.

Me too! I'm really happy to hear some of you here are interested in putting this together. What a fun thing to do.  

[Oldbutyet]

Just to be clear where we are at. . .

Binladeda has written a backing track (which sounds to me like it fits perfectly) and offered to sing in the lyric to said backing track.  (I'm sure he wrote the backing track, less sure he offered to sing in the lyric to it.) 

Jenna has no problem (and has expressed her support for) Binladeda to do so. 

Sooooo....  if I have this right, we are at a point of successful collaboration. 

Am I reading all this correctly? 

Just trying to make sure we are all on the same page.  I'm a little bit pumped over this.

Successful collaboration, still early days yet Verlon, with Jenna call on this and Bin link we got something to go on, the verses are lay out but if you think of any changes then lay your thoughts out, the whole idea now is to have fun making something happen here, im still up for the backing vocals    after a few cocktails that is   

[hardtwistmusic]

Just to be clear where we are at. . .

Successful collaboration, still early days yet Verlon, with Jenna call on this and Bin link we got something to go on, the verses are lay out but if you think of any changes then lay your thoughts out, the whole idea now is to have fun making something happen here, im still up for the backing vocals    after a few cocktails that is   

We probably have different ideas of the term "successful" in "successful collaboration."  For me, it just means a song resulted, and no one is an enemy.  ;o)

[Jenna]

Just to be clear where we are at. . .

Binladeda has written a backing track (which sounds to me like it fits perfectly) and offered to sing in the lyric to said backing track.  (I'm sure he wrote the backing track, less sure he offered to sing in the lyric to it.) 

Jenna has no problem (and has expressed her support for) Binladeda to do so. 

Sooooo....  if I have this right, we are at a point of successful collaboration. 

Am I reading all this correctly? 

Just trying to make sure we are all on the same page.  I'm a little bit pumped over this.

Successful collaboration, still early days yet Verlon, with Jenna call on this and Bin link we got something to go on, the verses are lay out but if you think of any changes then lay your thoughts out, the whole idea now is to have fun making something happen here, im still up for the backing vocals    after a few cocktails that is   

Yes. Please. I overwrite to get the rough shape of the structure, then bring in the chainsaw to shape the final figure. After that come the carving knives for the finer details. If anything needs changed to fit musical demands of one sort or another it's doable. I'm open to adding, subtracting, changing lyrics. Nothing is made of cement here.

[Oldbutyet]

Just to be clear where we are at. . .

Binladeda has written a backing track (which sounds to me like it fits perfectly) and offered to sing in the lyric to said backing track.  (I'm sure he wrote the backing track, less sure he offered to sing in the lyric to it.) 

Jenna has no problem (and has expressed her support for) Binladeda to do so. 

Sooooo....  if I have this right, we are at a point of successful collaboration. 

Am I reading all this correctly? 

Just trying to make sure we are all on the same page.  I'm a little bit pumped over this.

Successful collaboration, still early days yet Verlon, with Jenna call on this and Bin link we got something to go on, the verses are lay out but if you think of any changes then lay your thoughts out, the whole idea now is to have fun making something happen here, im still up for the backing vocals    after a few cocktails that is   

Yes. Please. I overwrite to get the rough shape of the structure, then bring in the chainsaw to shape the final figure. After that come the carving knives for the finer details. If anything needs changed to fit musical demands of one sort or another it's doable. I'm open to adding, subtracting, changing lyrics. Nothing is made of cement here.

Hey Verlon, my old man give me good advice many years back, he said "never argue with a woman who has a chainsaw in one hand and a carving knife in the other"   

Welcome to the chain gang   

[hardtwistmusic]

MY dad just said "never argue with a woman."  He didn't even mention the chainsaw and knife.  'o) 

[hardtwistmusic]

This would be how I would sequence this and cut back some of the lines.  Didn't add much.  Didn't feel it needed much added.  

FOOL'S PARADISE:

I'm picking up a new old habit
And chilling it on ice
Spinning vinyl memories
At a bar named Fool's Paradise

Since you left I have been
half-baked out of my mind
Filling up this vacancy
With every liquid I can find

(pick up pace to party tune)

Here in Paradise Johnnie Walker sits down
Orders Jim Beam to pour another round
Then he lets out a Rebel Yell
So loud it echoes all around Heaven Hill

I don't need you any more
To have a good time
I'm still dancing every night
With every women I can find.

They serve up Painkillers,
Fireballs and Rum Swizzles
Topping them off with,
Little splashes and a drizzles

They'll pour  call it you Southern Comfort
It starts up after eight
For every man or woman one who comes around
Who comes by to To deny and nurse their pain

Rumor has it you've moved on,
and left our love behind
But And, I'm still dancing every night
With every women I can find.

Damn the Weather yells out Tom Collins
I'd rather have it Dark 'n Stormy
Even dark and stormy, Long Island's within reach.
Hugging We got girls in bikinis chugging Appletinis
Enjoying the Sea Breeze with Sex on the Beach.

Rumor has it you've moved on,
and left our love behind
But I'm still dancing every night
With every women I can find.

They serve up Painkillers,
Fireballs and Rum Swizzles
Topping them off with,
Little splashes and a drizzles

SPOKEN OUT-TRO:  "Say, whatever did you hear what happened to Harry Harvey Wallbanger last night?" "I heard He went off for some hanky-panky with that Pink Lady with the Angel Face. You know, the one with the fuzzy navel?"

[Jenna]

Haha! Those are some very smart men who raised you boys. Although I can guarantee my chainsaw and carving knives are for lyrics only, so far.  

I like your changes Verlon. Very nice, but I did favor the Prince of Wales verse over the Tom Collins verse. It would be rough on a vocalist, though, and it may not have as much popular appeal. How many of these drinks are outdated on today's bar scene? Have any idea?

[hardtwistmusic]

Haha! Those are some very smart men who raised you boys. Although I can guarantee my chainsaw and carving knives are for lyrics only, so far.  

I like your changes Verlon. Very nice, but I did favor the Prince of Wales verse over the Tom Collins verse. It would be rough on a vocalist, though, and it may not have as much popular appeal. How many of these drinks are outdated on today's bar scene? Have any idea?

The "rough on the vocalist" is pretty much why I cut it out.  And it might be (can't ever tell til it's sung) a little hard on listeners too.  

Keep in mind also that I'm (for all effects and purposes) a non-drinker, and don't really know what I'm talking about when it comes to mixed drinks.  (on average, I'll have a beer every other month or so - all consumed during the heat of the summer when cold, cold beer REALLY tastes good)

So, don't be afraid to over-rule me.  I won't take it badly.  Never have.  Hopefully never will.