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Read June 16, 2017, 09:55:11 AM #0
exfairy

That Kiss

I uploaded this to WiP a few months ago but tried to expand, make it better... I don't know. Just general thoughts would be helpful? Smiley

Link: https://soundcloud.com/exfairy/that-kiss-1/s-TyzXk

Lyrics:
I see you on a Tuesday morning
You smile at me from across the room
My heart is giving me a warning
But I'm just so intrigued by you

Cos your smile brings butterflies to my heart
That beats like a ticking clock counting down the days till you'll be mine
Cos I don't think that I've ever felt like this
Wana know that it's me that you'll miss
And that kiss

Next Friday evening we're now friends
And I can't imagine this to end
Over a meal you look at me
And for the first time I feel like somebody

CH

I think I like you, do you like me too?
I hope that you'll choose me x2

CH
 
Read June 16, 2017, 12:11:18 PM #1
Kristupas

Re: That Kiss

I love the song movement melodically and lyrically (it goes up all along).
Beautiful voice, and good use of backing during chorus!

It really is catchy, do you plan on making a richer arrangement(besides ukulele and something else in the back), cause it is really nice, and something I find pleasant to listen to, I just personally am not a big fan of ukulele.
 
Read June 16, 2017, 02:22:57 PM #2
TimCurtis

Re: That Kiss

Lovely song.  Nice harmonies and the simplicity of it all, yet not so simple when I listen a bit deeper.  Makes me feel all warm and gooey. Smiley
 
Read June 18, 2017, 04:53:20 PM #3
PaulyX

Re: That Kiss

Sweet song.  Your voice harmonises well I thought.
I liked the home-made feel to it... are you drumming on a table or something for the percussion?  It all feels genuine and home-spun on account of that.
Sounds like you have a strong voice - to me it sounded like you gained confidence as the song went on.  The first verse sounded a little tentative / unsure of yourself but I didn't feel that by the end.  Maybe re-sing the first half with the same attitude?


It's all too beautiful.
 
Read July 02, 2017, 09:04:43 AM #4
exfairy

Re: That Kiss

Hey thanks for the feedback! Sorry it took so long to get back - deadlines and I also lost my mic cable so I couldn't record anything Sad
Anyway.
Yeah I want to get a better recording but honestly I don't have that instruments... Nor can I play them... :/ Haha. And the drumming was a pringles can Tongue
I'm coming back to it today. Hopefully I'll have a better recording by the end of today Tongue
 
Read July 02, 2017, 09:36:38 AM #5
Mutrins

Re: That Kiss

I uploaded this to WiP a few months ago but tried to expand, make it better... I don't know. Just general thoughts would be helpful? Smiley

Link: https://soundcloud.com/exfairy/that-kiss-1/s-TyzXk

Lyrics:
I see you on a Tuesday morning
You smile at me from across the room
My heart is giving me a warning
But I'm just so intrigued by you

Cos your smile brings butterflies to my heart
That beats like a ticking clock counting down the days till you'll be mine
Cos I don't think that I've ever felt like this
Wana know that it's me that you'll miss
And that kiss

Next Friday evening we're now friends
And I can't imagine this to end
Over a meal you look at me
And for the first time I feel like somebody

CH

I think I like you, do you like me too?
I hope that you'll choose me x2

CH

You have a very natural quality and innocence to your voice. I also like the home-made feeling of this, and I agree the ending gets stronger and I enjoy the harmonies as well. Love that it's a pringles can!!

I think this could be really great with some fine tuning. It feels like it goes off tempo or beat at times. And, while I do like the chorus, I think the melody has so much room to grow and really grab attention with. The base is definitely there, though. Any chance you'd be able to record this in a studio? I can imagine it sounding amazing and you've got such a great, natural voice.

Do you have Logic or any program like that?

All that said, great job on this. I love where it can go!!

Micky
 
Read July 02, 2017, 04:42:49 PM #6
exfairy

Re: That Kiss

I uploaded this to WiP a few months ago but tried to expand, make it better... I don't know. Just general thoughts would be helpful? Smiley

Link: https://soundcloud.com/exfairy/that-kiss-1/s-TyzXk

Lyrics:
I see you on a Tuesday morning
You smile at me from across the room
My heart is giving me a warning
But I'm just so intrigued by you

Cos your smile brings butterflies to my heart
That beats like a ticking clock counting down the days till you'll be mine
Cos I don't think that I've ever felt like this
Wana know that it's me that you'll miss
And that kiss

Next Friday evening we're now friends
And I can't imagine this to end
Over a meal you look at me
And for the first time I feel like somebody

CH

I think I like you, do you like me too?
I hope that you'll choose me x2

CH

You have a very natural quality and innocence to your voice. I also like the home-made feeling of this, and I agree the ending gets stronger and I enjoy the harmonies as well. Love that it's a pringles can!!

I think this could be really great with some fine tuning. It feels like it goes off tempo or beat at times. And, while I do like the chorus, I think the melody has so much room to grow and really grab attention with. The base is definitely there, though. Any chance you'd be able to record this in a studio? I can imagine it sounding amazing and you've got such a great, natural voice.

Do you have Logic or any program like that?

All that said, great job on this. I love where it can go!!

Micky

Thanks Smiley I wish I could record in a proper studio. I've got a make-do one with a mic and cubase on my laptop but that's about it... I've been learning a lot more about tech though this year (did a Pro Tools module at uni) but struggling without a midi keyboard... Tongue
 
Read July 02, 2017, 04:52:23 PM #7
exfairy

Re: That Kiss

New version of the song. I've added more guitar and mandolin and changed the harmonies. Not perfect and I need to figure out how to convert clips to mono for the last mando part but yeah... A short day's work Smiley

Link: https://soundcloud.com/exfairy/that-kiss-2/s-3vozq
 
Read July 02, 2017, 09:26:14 PM #8
pompeyjazz

Re: That Kiss

Lovely song Exfairy. I love your harmonies and the wonderful melody.  It smacks of innocence and yearning. Lovely elements to get into a song and something that's impossible for me
 
Read July 02, 2017, 10:17:37 PM #9
Oldbutyet

Re: That Kiss

Im thinking of using that word Brilliant here, is that a ukulele you're playing.

Nice style i come back, whats next   Cool
 
Read July 03, 2017, 07:46:35 AM #10
LostBoy

Re: That Kiss

Hello there,

Lovely chorus! Nice harmonies. (They do need tightening up a little in places,but that's just a practice thing.) I love the guitar & the subtle beat.

So yeah, I have no idea what your set up is, but if u could get compression on your vocals,then that would be excellent. It just means that we won't have to strain to hear some words. Basically it just turns your awesome vocal into SUPER AWESOME VOCAL!! Grin

Lovely stuff though. Smiley
 
Read July 03, 2017, 10:36:00 AM #11
exfairy

Re: That Kiss

Im thinking of using that word Brilliant here, is that a ukulele you're playing.

Nice style i come back, whats next   Cool

Thanks Smiley And yup, ukulele throughout!
 
Read July 03, 2017, 10:36:54 AM #12
exfairy

Re: That Kiss

Hello there,

Lovely chorus! Nice harmonies. (They do need tightening up a little in places,but that's just a practice thing.) I love the guitar & the subtle beat.

So yeah, I have no idea what your set up is, but if u could get compression on your vocals,then that would be excellent. It just means that we won't have to strain to hear some words. Basically it just turns your awesome vocal into SUPER AWESOME VOCAL!! Grin

Lovely stuff though. Smiley

Thank you Smiley If I knew what compression was and how to work it, I might eventually do that one day... Haha Tongue
 
Read July 03, 2017, 11:27:57 AM #13
exfairy

Re: That Kiss

3rd version? https://soundcloud.com/exfairy/that-kiss-3/s-yxjG5
 
Read July 03, 2017, 12:25:31 PM #14
Oldbutyet

Re: That Kiss

What im hearing is you trying to make your vocal recording perfect, stop.

Dont lose (and forgive me for using this word) cuteness in the way you sing your lyrics, its your style and its a winner, also you play the ukulele really well, if i was a recording producer and im not but if i was i would go with the recording that suits your style   Cool
 
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