[Arkwright]

Neil C asked me to collab with him on this one and I was a little hesitant at first as Summer always reminds me of happy, carefree kind of days and my lyrics always tend to lean towards the more morose dark side of life. However, no one ever learned anything by staying in their comfort zone so I thought i would give it a go... Enjoy!

Sun Kissed Days

VERSE 1
Endless days
We chased the waves
Along the golden shore
The smile that blessed
This lovers heart
Has broken many more

PRE CHORUS
Time stood still
On this barren land
As grains of sand
Slid through your hands

VERSE 2
Stars that light
The blackened night
Spin circles round the moon
A warm west wind
Closed our eyes
As midnight turned to noon

PRE CHORUS
Time stood still
On this barren land
As grains of sand
Slid through your hands

CHORUS
The sun went down
The ocean cried
We mourn the day
That Summer died
We lost our way
In a twilight haze
But found true love
On sun Kissed Days

VERSE 3
Laid in flowers
We wasted hours
Forever never ends
When Summer dies
And Autumn leaves
We’ll still be Winter friends

PRE CHORUS
Time stood still
On this barren land
As grains of sand
Slid through your hands

CHORUS
The sun went down
The ocean cried
We mourn the day
That Summer died
We lost our way
In a twilight haze
But found true love
On sun Kissed Days

[diademgrove]

No need to be hesitant, a bloody good set of lyrics. Looking forward to hearing the song when its completed.

I think you have erred on the side of dark in your happy, carefree lyrics and all the better for it.

Keith

[Arkwright]

Hey Jackdaw

Could you please post your lyrics under your own thread for comments.

Many thanks...

[Gill]

I agree getting out your comfort zone could turn into your new one. And it could be with those lyrics. nice 

[Paulski]

A fine set of lyrics here and I'm sure that Neil will do them justice.
My only sugg is in the arrangement. I think it takes too long to get to the title and chorus..
Because of this, and the feeling that the pre-chorus doesn't really set up the chorus, I would suggest making the pre-chorus into a bridge that happens only once. Oh, and start with a chorus 

Not looking forward to getting beaten by this one (but looking forward to hearing it)
 

Paul

[Martinswede]

Nice and theme centered poetry!
Making a good song out of these lyrics shouldn't be
impossible.  

I only have two small complaints.

'Stars that light
The blackened night
Spin circles round the moon'

It's the 'spin circles' that doesn't agree with me.
In my imagination stars move, from our perspective,
really slow.

'A warm west wind
Closed our eyes
As midnight turned to noon'

'Noon' seems like a rhyme word. But on the other hand the
image of something being the complete opposite really works.

Martin

[adamfarr]

Hi there - really liked the Autumn leaves section - very clever, and for sure there's a touch of melancholy there (as there is throughout - the protagonist seems not quite able to fully enjoy the moment does he?)

I'd have to agree the that moon and noon part seemed not quite as strong. Perhaps because noon isn't something you hear a lot of people say in real life? You have the passing of time in the next Pre chorus so perhaps something else could go here - In my mind I can't get past 'cocoon' as an idea of a temporary confortable sheltering place, but maybe that's a step too far!

But overall I can hear this as a perfect Summer song - with just a touch of complexity to make it interesting!

[Vintage54]

   Hello Ark,
     Lots to like here, reads more like a poem than a song lyric to me, but where's the harm in that. If Neil can find the right music, i will bow to his ear. Hope he does it justice, deserves it.

                                   Vintage54