[mikek]

Really great song and performance. Definitely got a hint of the dark vibe in it... Really cool!

I'd love to hear it arranged and produced up more. To begin with I think it'd feel better in my ears if you played two rhythm guitar parts and panned them slightly to each side. At the moment with just the one guitar there's too much going on in the center... I also think you could do more with reverb on the instruments and your vocal to help spread the sound and add a bit of extra eeriness.

I can imagine all kinds of stuff to add to the arrangement to bring out more of the dark vibe... just hard for me to articulate, and I'd be rambling anyway. Made me want to get my hands on it to be honest, I love it .

Really cool stuff.

about using reverb to add some atmosphere.. my initial thought was the same, and i started there and eventually walked it all back to basically dry vocals.  haha.  i will recosider

i truly appreciate the encouraging feedback.  hearing that someone likes a song is the best feedback us writers can hope for, isn't it ?  thank you!

[Cazrolina]

This song is soooooo good. Love it.
It's perfect as is, but id add a bass in places to match the sound at 2:29 - i.e. staying on the same note when the rest moves up - to enhance it here n there. Oh, and I imagined a harmonica solo somewhere. Would work a treat.
Fantastic lyrics. Love, love, love.
Caz

[Mike67]

Loved the lyrics when you posted them, and you've done a great job of turning them into a song. Loved the guitar and percussion, and the vocals are spot on. Some jazz guitar might work, but so might some slide guitar - the theme cried blues more than jazz to me. I was disappointed the mercy line as sund at around 2:20 didn't appear again as I loved it. Using that at the outro would be more emotive, or even switching between long and short- mercyyyyyy, mercy, mercyyyyyy, mercy. You could use to add some instability at the end.

Great work,

Mike