all for free (garage - or rather home office - rock)

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Bernd

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« on: February 25, 2017, 02:47:30 PM »
My latest tune - the second after Rock Bernd III. As I always like my latest tunes best this is the best yet - as long as my rating may last (not very long, usually).

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13535650

(Rock) Bernd
Bernd
good lyricist, mediocre songwriter, lousy musician
likes rock but writes for anybody anyway ;-)

mickyplankton

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« Reply #1 on: February 25, 2017, 07:28:25 PM »
Hi mate. Like myself you are a little amateur on production and timing. So I will leave others to advise you here. There's definitely a good song in here, but I think it's let down a bit by the way you have recorded it. Your in the right place though.

delb0y

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« Reply #2 on: February 25, 2017, 11:11:23 PM »
Good message to get across to the youth (and some of us older folks) in the modern world. I know nothing about production and arranging but this feels to me like it's the sort of song that could benefit from expertise in that area - especially in bringing the vocals and drums up front and giving them a bit more life. The song/riff is very stop / start and never quite takes off - but it's catchy none the less, and I can hear it even after it's finished which is always a good thing.
West Country Country Boy

Bernd

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« Reply #3 on: February 27, 2017, 04:24:15 PM »
Thank you both for listening and commenting.

I turned the guitar tracks a little lower, thus bringing vocals, drums, and bass a bit more upfront in the mix. That's as much as I as a layman 'producer' seem to be able to achieve. Thanks a lot for pointing that out.

As for my timing, a lot of my problems there are due to the different latency effects that Cubase produces - in addition to my amateurish performance. I edit them as good I can, but I can't say that I like it...

Bernd

* different for audio and Midi, and also different depending on the VST you use - quite a mess
Bernd
good lyricist, mediocre songwriter, lousy musician
likes rock but writes for anybody anyway ;-)

Steng

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« Reply #4 on: February 28, 2017, 05:41:22 PM »
Berndt,

This isn't bad but it needs loosening up a bit. It's metal all right but sounds a bit robotic, it needs a bit of oil, both the guitars and the vocal. It's too staccato for me. There's a song in there though, so keep at it.

Steng


JonDavies

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« Reply #5 on: February 28, 2017, 07:54:41 PM »
It's good but there doesn't seem to be much in the way of dynamic contrast - maybe consider stripping down the verses a bit a building up to a louder chorus?

I get a Jethro Tull Aqualung vibe from this

Mike67

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« Reply #6 on: March 01, 2017, 01:39:14 PM »
I agree with the other reviewers.  There's definitely a good metal song in the making here, but it's crying out a strong, driving guitar riff and bass line.  Very much a specialist area, and not mine, but there are others on the site producing some great metal stuff from what I've heard.  Perhaps PM one or two of them and see if they can help?

Good work,

Mike