[rightly]

Oooh, I saw a break up a'coming and wrote this song by way of Preparation.
Although I love the song it didn't help that much n' I had to write another two.

I hope to get this recording remixed/mastered by superior beings (knuckles and spuds).
Feedback welcome

SORRY FOR MY CONFUSION. THIS IS THE LINK TO THE IMPROVED VERSION:

https://soundcloud.com/rightly/there-to-disappear6


OLDER VERSION:

https://soundcloud.com/rightly/there-to-disappear-acoustic_demo?in=rightly/sets/t-ac-t-i-l-e-v-a-l-u-e-s


there to disappear



with muted senses, searching so as not to find

shuffling our feet as, as all our precious clocks un-

winding n' wily, what be your business here?

if not to remind me of who I am... and then,

and there to disappear, and then,

 and there to disappear
____

guarded ignorance, wonder doesn’t have a name

curtsy t’ indiff’rence as night follows day again

no time for distance, let me ring a bell in your ear

all out of patience, turn another page... and then,

and there to disappear, and then,

 and there to disappear
______

all these demands, this rush for affection

who needs love when we’ve got protection?, and then,

n’ then and there to disappear, and then,

 and there to disappear



_________________________

[GuitarArt1980]

I really like this. I love your voice - reminds me of Bowie meets Robert Pollard (Guided by Voices).

The lyrics are excellent and more unique and pointed than most I hear, especially when it comes to "break-up songs". There are bigger themes of humanity here. The somewhat irregular guitar playing echoes the lyrics' sense of uneasiness and fragility of human relationships. It's like holding onto something as solid as a plastic bag blowing in the wind. (maybe I'm over-analyzing).

Good work!

[rightly]

I'm glad you liked the song, guitarart. 
Tomorrow i Should have a better mastered copy of this recording. This version was a little rushed, I am pleased with the performance though   

[pompeyjazz]

You've got an amazing ability to knock out some really interesting and diverse stuff. I will reserve my full review until I hear tomorrows version but based on this its going to be excellent

[rightly]

You've got an amazing ability to knock out some really interesting and diverse stuff. I will reserve my full review until I hear tomorrows version but based on this its going to be excellent

SORRY FOR MY CONFUSION. THIS IS THE LINK TO THE IMPROVED VERSION:

https://soundcloud.com/rightly/there-to-disappear6

[Mike67]

The main thing I like about this forum is the variety, and this is one of the most inventive songs, musically and lyrically, I've heard for sure. It could have been written and performed by David Bowie, David Byrne, Tom Waits - some of our greatest innovators. I can't praise higher praise than that.

Mike

[Boydie]

I liked the song itself and the vocal

The guitar didn't seem to really support the performance as it didn't really establish a driving rhythm or tonal backing for the vocal

I could hear in my head what I think you were going for and I think this song would be suited to a band performance with driving bass and crashy drums as the vocal sounds more like a "front man" vocal

I would love to hear a version of this song like that!

[Paulski]

Hey rightly

I loved this - so creative and unique.
Don't have a clue what chords you're strumming or how I could possibly sing along to that melody, but I still love it. 

Another heaping helping please!
Paul

[Jamie]

Hi, you have a distinctive vocal style not like Morrissey, but that sort of idea. Inventive structure, I agree with a previous comment about putting some heavy guitars,drums etc then I think it would be more cohesive! Getting there!
Cheers
Jamie

[ScottLevi]

Hey Righty,

It's so great to have you here, your lyrics for a starter and just so uniquely put together and they're a joy to read - if only in anticipation to how you're going to pull them off!

It's easy to forget how good your vocals are with all the cool lyrics and funky guitar, but it struck me straight away in the opening line.

Would really love a close up on how you're attacking that guitar, it's unique and interesting enough to stand aside the words without feeling like it needs more.

It's interesting though I hold "Chance Machine" up there along with your others even though it has a distinctively different feel to it, and am conflicted personally between the honesty and passion brought in the raw acoustic songs and my curiosity of what other creativity you could express with the extra layers.

Actual constructive criticism I'm as useless as ever.. just some rambling.

All the best,
Scott.

[rightly]

thanks folks.

I am happy with this song, it will improve
thanks for the feedback - y'know I don't have a band, or the time for one
I need to write more and also work on my technique.

I've a long way to go, lovin' it.
                           

[Skub]

Hey Rightly.

I love the lyrical excellence,almost tossed casually away,to explain it in the words of your own song, "curtsy t’ indiff’rence as night follows day again".

To be irreplaceable,you have to be different. That's you man. 

[Steng]

Rightly, this is like a performance of some avant garde art, something I'm a tad confused by and think I shouldn't like but I do. Pity Beefheart is no longer with us, you guys doing a tune together would be sweet. Can't say I understand the lyrics (or the music  ) but I don't need to as it just works - can't wait 'til your next tune.

[rightly]

Rightly, this is like a performance of some avant garde art, something I'm a tad confused by and think I shouldn't like but I do. Pity Beefheart is no longer with us, you guys doing a tune together would be sweet. Can't say I understand the lyrics (or the music  ) but I don't need to as it just works - can't wait 'til your next tune.

lol. Steng...
it's true, the lyrics here are quite vague
what I felt at the time of writing it was clear though, I thought it might communicate itself somehow.

at some point I realised my ladyfriend was quietly preparing to end the relationship, the thought of this made me sad and I knew there wasn't much I could do to change things. I tried to ignore it.

breaking up was for the best and inevitable, I knew it but didn't want to accept it.
I was once spoke about it, soberly to a buddy.
Assessing the situation honestly, really didn't make me feel any better, so I dived back into my active ignorance.
I wrote the song is this sort of limbo.

I really think this song works
there's a muted desperation in there
The whole situation became so disturbing and painful I realised it couldn't get any worse.
Things took their natural course, we broke up, I certainly didn't feel any better.

Every now n then I caught glimpse of an abstract idea that I was now suffering more naturaly.

moving on

[tina m]

Hi Rightly...
the guitar sounded very creative .. it felt more like dancing going on in the background than guitar playing! & the vocal was like a Shakespeare play going on in the foreground with those lyrics!
wow, Rightlyo & Juliet maybe ..ok sorry about that!
anyway its super stuff  & I love your Morrisey bits in the vocal

I dont know if Ive said this before but have you thought of performing in doublet & hose?
I think youd go down a storm!