[rightly]

the original to this song I wrote maybe 20 years ago
originally it was very difficult for me to play. there was too much to it

the original had a lot more verses too
a few months ago I needed a new song and radically edited and recorded
minor changes have come about since the recording
I'm happy with this one

https://soundcloud.com/rightly/love-is-making-justice-game?in=rightly/sets/tactiles-remastered



 love is making justice a game

I don't want to hurt anyone
I have to do something with this pain
I'm angry in a gentle way
smoke was playing in the air
I lit a candle with the greatest care
as quiet as not being there

everything is remembered in hate
and love is making justice a game

the truth defends any criminal
you don't have to see it that way too
but I could not find exception to this rule
today I'm giving more than I'll forget
the blood has dried the hurting hasn't started yet
I'm falling down a slide it's getting wet

everything is remembered in hate
and love is making justice a game
memories won't even go halfway
I'll curse you and be glad that you came

and love is making justice a game
and love is making justice a game

[Oldbutyet]

You have your own style which i really enjoy listening to, on this song i thought the guitar could have been closer to the mic sounded a little distant if you know what i mean, your style makes your lyrics great to listen to but on the last three lines of the first verse i wonder maybe rearrange.

I lit a candle with the greatest care
as quiet as not being there
watching smoke playing in the air

Maybe even repeat those lines near the end also if you were playing this live three minutes is to short, great listening    

[CaliaMoko]

I don't have much to say, as I'm not good at the production side of things and can't speak to that, and I don't really have any improvements to suggest for the lyrics, beyond what oldbutyet mentioned. I really noticed what he said, because the smoke playing in the air line stuck out to me at first. I didn't get it at all (as I've mentioned before, I have a tendency to be dense). But when oldbutyet suggested rearranging those lines, it totally all fell into place for me. So I agree with him on that.

I think this is my favorite song of all of yours I've heard so far. Nice job.

Vicki

[pompeyjazz]

Hey. Mr Rightly is on top form once again. Think this is great. It has your unique quirky choppy style which compliments the subject matter. Your voice is sounding very good. I think you must have done a lot of work on honing the vocals. Nice stuff once again man

[Morefrog Jones]

Great title which makes you want to know more. Like the lyrics more than the song - but that would be down to personal taste more than anything else. For those who like this style of Music -  what I would call angry folk music - I'm sure it would go down very well.

[tina m]

the first listen I spent trying to work out  the deeper meaning of the title & missed most of the song...being profound doesnt always work in your favour 
second time around id got it & realy enjoyed the melody & the lyrical dexterity
your guitar playing is so busy ,sometimes its like a whole band playing away
what would we write about if love was perfect?  

[Skub]

Yo Sir Rightly. 

I always keenly anticipate new lyrics from yourself,so many lines to appreciate and dwell upon.

I love the imagery of 'I lit a candle with the greatest care
as quiet as not being there' and 'angry in a gentle way'.

I hear a band doing this one for sure.

Thanks for posting man. 

[PaulAds]

Yeah...I agree with Skub - I think this would be great done with a band...

Love the lyrics, as always...I thought the guitar sounded slightly out of tune - or perhaps a little sloppy in one or two places (?) though it adds a certain charm.

Nevertheless...another really good song to add to your impressive catalogue.

[HenryOFarrell]

Great as usual, I feel as if the lyrics are really meaningful, especially the 'truth defends any criminal' line.
I'm glad you finally posted this masterpiece after 20 years!

[shadowfax]

Your inimitable aggressive style..excellent lyrics mate and a quite powerful rendition of a good piece..

onwards and upwards...

[rightly]

thanks for the feedback!

I won't change the lyrics anymore
the original lyrics were written so vey long ago...
 it's like I've lost the right to do that.

True, I think my stuff is a little too busy at times
 because I do tend to hear more going on than what I can hope to reproduce with a single guitar and a single voice.
I'm happily and painstakingly taking steps to correct this.

It took me some nerve to start playing this live, makes me feel quite vulnerable.
I'm really into this one these days.
In retrospect I see the songs which make me feel more vulnerale are those I cherish the most.

yes, Shadowfax, "onwards and upwards".
These songs of mine I'm posting are older (not in any negative sense) than the Unwritten songs that Are in existence.
I'm learning a lot these days mostly about technique and production.
This preoccupation leads me away from what I love about this craft the most but I trust it's the right way to go.


Please don't anybody think I'm ignoring any constructive criticism.
I'm not at all as sure of myself as my voice might (sometimes) imply. Staying receptive is an integral part of my machinery.

I'm moving forward and any new insights need time to be realised.

Hugs all 'round! Rightly.

[shadowfax]

yes, Shadowfax, "onwards and upwards".
These songs of mine I'm posting are older (not in any negative sense) than the Unwritten songs that Are in existence.
I'm learning a lot these days mostly about technique and production.
This preoccupation leads me away from what I love about this craft the most but I trust it's the right way to go.


totally get where your coming from mate!!! the technicalities of proper arrangement and proper production piss me off also...problem is, yer average listener expects a certain standard or they just will not listen to our work, I have spent many hours/days, probably months learning how to produce better and often said to myself I'd rather being doing songs!! but if making them sound better means more peeps will listen, then, for me..it makes sense to do it...If your songs are just for friends and relatives..keep on keepin on, If your songs are for the world outside (which yours obviously are or you wouldn't put them on the site) then making them sound better..is the way to go, so good luck mate and if you just make each song a bit better (production wise) than the last, then in a year or so you'll look back at your old stuff..as I did, and think,..by heck, I've improved so much I need a Jack Daniels quick!!!

best to you, Kevin

[Skub]

I'm learning a lot these days mostly about technique and production.
This preoccupation leads me away from what I love about this craft the most but I trust it's the right way to go.

I'm in the same situation Rightly. I badly want to get the basic learning process of daw operation done and dusted,so I can use what I've learned to make music. Just right now I am spending a large chunk of time operating the tool and as a result playing guitar and the rest have taken a back seat.

Kevin is on the money when he says,this period will pass and you'll come out of the other end a more polished and better presented songster.

Keep the faith. 

[pompeyjazz]

You guys are absolutely right. It's a bit of a steep learning curve when you're getting acquainted with a DAW but it's worth the effort for sure. You're never going to stop learning about DAW's as the possibilities are almost infinite but once you've cracked the basics I'm sure you will feel that it's been very worthwhile

[ScottLevi]

Hey Rightly

Very nice again.

Your lyrics are always to be admired but the first verse hit me so hard is worth a specific shoutout. "I don't want to hurt anyone but I have to do something with this pain" and "as quite as not being there".

I often feel like we have similar frustrations but do such a better job at expressing them.

My advise personally wouldn't be to get too caught up in production and DAW's - you never want to stop enjoying your craft so mix it in to your work at your own pace.

You work always strikes me as having a live orientation anyway, and I'm still waiting for you to come Brum xD

All the best,
Scott.