[AnitaFox]

Hi All,

Just wanted to post a little lyrics I've been working on.  In my head it is quite jazz/blusey, possibly Alesha Keys style.

Time and Tears

I think it’s time (I think it’s time)
I figured out why
I still feel this way
I know things won’t change
You can’t turn back time
When I’m walking down the street
I feel like I’m borderline
I can’t remember the days
When your love didn’t cloud my mind
All the good you said you saw in me
You used up
I’m losing my mind
Lost count of the hours where I’ve sat and I’ve cried about giving you my love
Knowing how I’d never be
Enough for you
My friends said this love it was destined to end
Now
Since you’ve been gone I’ve
I’ve let myself down
Catching tears as they fall
There’s been no moving on
I’ve been cry, I’ve been cry, I’ve been cry, I’ve been cry, I’ve been crying
Over a love that you just pushed aside
No second thought for what you and I
What we could become
And now I’m gonna prove that you’re wrong
Cos I’m gonna grow
Till you don’t recognise me no more
Gonna dust myself off
Because I put your stuff out
You were wrong and I’m done and I know that
I’ve got to be stronger
Than what I was yesterday
Gonna leave you behind
No more praying on my mind
No more time
No more crying for this love that was destined to end

As always any feedback is much appreciated.

Cheers
A

[CaliaMoko]

I'm having trouble getting this to feel like a song in my head. You said you hear it as something kind of jazzy or bluesy...is what you're hearing in your head divided into verses at all, or is it more like one long "through-composed" piece?

Do you expect it to have a repeating melody and, if yes, what sections are likely to be the same melody lines as each other? Knowing that *might* help me get a better feel for this.

There is one line I think I get pretty well: "I’ve been cry, I’ve been cry, I’ve been cry, I’ve been cry, I’ve been crying". I hear that as a kind of sob, as if the singer is having trouble getting beyond the "cry" but finally makes it to "crying". I find that very effective at getting the feel of the mood across.

I'll be interested in hearing more about this as it develops.

Vicki

[diademgrove]

Hi Anita,

it's difficult to see how you could fit the words into a conventional structure. Although using traditional folk methods of different time signatures, different lengths of verses, etc I'm sure you could come with a way of setting them to music.

You've created some great images and I'm tempted by your offer to try and set them to music.

In the meantime I'll check out Alesha Keyes.

Keith