My Heart Opens Like a Rose (bare bone contest entry)

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Paulski

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« on: July 18, 2016, 01:30:22 PM »
Hi guys

Well, it doesn't mention "bones", but it is just piano and vocals so I hope that qualifies.
Mix is pretty hot - you may have to turn the volume down or maybe right off if you don't like it :) I'll fix that :)  It's the shortest ballad I've ever written - would love to get your feedback.

thanks
Paul

https://soundcloud.com/paulcanuck/my-heart-opens-like-a-rose

 My Heart Opens Like a Rose

 My heart opens like a rose for you
 All its secrets are exposed to you
 I try hard to hold love in
 But you offer me your hand, and then
 My heart opens like a rose

 My heart opens like a flower in bloom
 And it blossoms every hour with you
 What we found the day we met
 Is still sprouting from the ground, and yet
 My heart opens like a rose

 Keys to my heart
 I keep closely guarded
 Dancing with someone new
 But how would I know
 My love can unfold
 The moment I glance at you?

 It opens like a rose
 All my secrets are exposed
 When you save me from the night
 And you bathe me in your tender light
 My heart opens like a rose

Wolfini

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« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2016, 01:48:10 PM »
Instant classic. Wow.

What a great melody with tasteful words and a wonderful moody piano.

Volume was ok, but the vocals sound as if they clipped in some places.

Short as it is, I felt that the bridge part could use some additional instrumental framing, as it comes in quite suddenly and lacks a build up to the chorus again.

Congrats for this pretty song, Bye Wolfi
Finished albums: wolfgangn.bandcamp.com
Recent songs: soundclick.com/wolfini

tboswell

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« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2016, 05:15:49 PM »
Classy stuff Paul, very classy.

Sounds like a standard, great hookline, moving lyric and delivered sincerely.

Really interesting progression in the middle 8 that you resolve back beautifully.

Love it

Tom.

adamfarr

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« Reply #3 on: July 18, 2016, 05:26:28 PM »
Very listenable indeed - it does have something classical about it. Progression very interesting and lyrics sound exactly as they should, also with some non-obvoius line lengths which keep the ear waiting and interested.

Quite a bold range to the melody - I reckon you might want to take it down a tone when you play it live ;)

nooms

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« Reply #4 on: July 18, 2016, 11:27:14 PM »
beautiful piano opening
enticing. wish i could play like that..
i like the song and the changes.. shape of it
i imagine it in a musical or a review, think its the simple directness of the lyric ..
soul in your vocal gives the lyric creedence, makes it real. refreshing. 

if youd sprayed it with strings and candlabra it would be a different beast
thoroughly enjoyed it
power to you paul

and good luck with the competition censors ..
i may not believe this tomorrow...

https://soundcloud.com/nooms-1

crystalsuzy

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« Reply #5 on: July 19, 2016, 08:00:33 AM »
Very beautiful Paul, and I have to agree, it's a classic :) Lovely piano, vocals and lyrics  :)
I also think it would sound fantastic in a musical :) Short and sweet and a winner for sure :)

Movin Flavour

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« Reply #6 on: July 19, 2016, 04:10:37 PM »
A beautiful ballad Paul.

Could imagine Old Blue Eyes singing this in one of his musicals.

Great for the comp....but would love to hear this developed after the competition, could easily imagine some strings on this....just as Grace Kelly walks in.


Sandeep

tina m

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« Reply #7 on: July 19, 2016, 07:09:31 PM »
omg who let bert bacharach in ! :)
you are very versatile paul... such a classic sounding song & I thought theyd all been written!
classic lyrics guaranteed to melt hearts & send florists into a romantic frenzy &  paired with a beautiful butterfly of a melody
love the bridge part what a lovely contrast
& not a bone in sight....ah of course the ivories! ..very clever :)
Tell me Im wonderful & I ll be nice to you :)

MartynRich

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« Reply #8 on: July 19, 2016, 10:16:16 PM »
Wow. One of the first songs in ages I´ve listened to all the way through without starting to type. Captivating from the start. I´m imagining you dressed in a suit with a trilby singing this to a bar of 30s cool dudes digging it totally.

Wonderful, wonderful stuff. Well done.

My Heart Opens Like A Rose - you git. So jealous of that line  :)

IronKnee

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« Reply #9 on: July 20, 2016, 05:55:21 AM »
Hey there Paul.....very, very nice. The sentiment is just dripping with sweet.............necter 
A great Broadway show melody, with a Hallmark card lyric. Pretty impressive  ;)
Nice job, Paul,
                                         8)-Tom
"I know the truth, by my struggle against it"
                                                          -IronKnee

Binladeda

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« Reply #10 on: July 20, 2016, 02:19:47 PM »

 Hi Paul,

 Classic stuff my friend ;D ;D  Especially liked what
 you did in the break. Great knowledge/craft and
 imagination on display here

 They just don't/can't write them like this anymore.
 The classic style is from a bygone musical era.  Yet
 what you've done sounds so COOL ;D ;D

 How do you do that ?? ;D ;D ;D

 Loved it.......and my gran would've too ;D

Nowt as queer as folk...........my gran

Skub

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« Reply #11 on: July 20, 2016, 03:03:37 PM »
Cool,crooner choon,Paul.  :)

Listening,I feel under dressed. I should be attired in a tuxedo,carelessly casting cash at the roulette table in an impressively offhand manner,while the lady in the LBD edges a little closer every time I throw more money. 8)
 The live band in the casino is tight and mega professional,the performance seemingly effortless. It matches perfectly with the atmosphere and the elegantly decadent clientele.

A musical chameleon are you,Yoda say,Paul.   8)

Paulski

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« Reply #12 on: July 20, 2016, 06:33:45 PM »
Thanks everyone for your generous feedback!

@Wolfini - appreciate the kind remarks. I'll check on vocal clipping - wouldn't surprise me given how loud it is. Also agree the bridge could be introduced more smoothly. I'll do that if/when I do a fuller production.

@tboswell cheers Tom - means a lot from a progression pro like your good self. Kind of trying to prove that a bridge can go almost anywhere as long as it resolves when it ends :)

@adamfarr - Hi Adam - I'm grateful for the "classic" comments not that I set out to achieve that :)

@nooms - thanks so much for the kind words. Yes, guitars and synths edged out the piano for a while there so glad you liked hearing its return.

@crystalsuzy - thank you my fellow canuckski !

@Movin Flavour - cheers Sandeep. Yeah it was all I could do NOT to put a cello in that second verse. Maybe version 2 I'll get a chance.

@tinam - Hi Tina - thanks for the kind comments - I'll take a Burt Bacharach comparison anyday - I'm as dated as they come :) Glad you liked the bridge - it was a worry of mine that it segueyed a bit too much.

@MartynRich - so very kind of you to say those nice things. Love that term "git" - not used much in the colonies these days but still proud to be one :)

@IronKnee - cheers Tom - Hope it wasn't too sweet - sacharine or however it's spelt. Always a fine line to walk.

@Binladeda - thanks bin - won't be long before we're all bygoners so better to keep this stuff alive IMO. Appreciate the kind comments! :)

@Skub - ha - great painting of the casino scene - you're hired to do the accompanying video :) Gotta find that lady in the LBD.. A fine gentleman are you. :)



delb0y

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« Reply #13 on: July 20, 2016, 07:31:02 PM »
Most enjoyable! Wonderful melody and lyrics and great M8. I'm now looking forward to Paulski: The Musical  ;D

Really good - can't believe the quality of the Bare Bones songs.

Derek
West Country Country Boy

refusedrevival

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« Reply #14 on: July 20, 2016, 08:16:02 PM »
Hi,

beautiful piano playing and lovely vocals.
Not my kind of music but very impressive song.

Nice Job!

refusedrevival