[richardyot]

This is an indie-pop song with a heavy dash of synthesizer, a blend of chimey guitars and warm synth sounds. The song is much more energetic and upbeat than my usual (my usual tempo is around 90bpm, this ones races all the way to 120), but the vibe is still sad.

The production is still WIP as there is something bothering me about the first verse in particular, and also the long held notes in the second verse which might need revising (I like the vibe of those held notes, but the execution could be better).

https://soundcloud.com/richardyot/doubt

Lyrics:

I'm losing the will for the fight
Just tell me it'll all be alright

Cos I know that not it's what I say
I won't do, but I do anyway

You look to me for certainty
But all I have is doubt
You're hoping for some honesty
And I'm honestly all out

You look to me for certainty
And all I have is doubt
You put your trust and faith in me
But that's not what I'm about


I wish I had something to say
I don't but I pretend anyway

It's not the thoughts that flow from my mind
But the truth that I'm struggling to find

You look to me for certainty
But all I have is doubt
You're hoping for some honesty
And I'm honestly all out

You look to me for certainty
And all I have is doubt
You put your trust and faith in me
But that's not what I'm about


I'm so cold I don't even feel numb
It'd be tragic if it wasn't so dumb
I'm a mess even on a good day
You'd better get out of the way

You look to me for certainty
And all I want is out
You're looking for security
And all I have is doubt

You look to me for certainty
But I am bailing out
You put your trust and faith in me
But that's not what I'm about

[diademgrove]

I quite liked this. A few things got in the way a little. I wasn't keen on the lines starting "its not the thoughts" to "struggling to find." dragged the song back for me. I can see that it fits the mood of the music but the jolt was a bit too much for me.

The "t"s at the end of lines sound louder and had a strange sound. Once I noticed distracted me from the song.

Finally I thought it ended a little too abruptly. As if you no longer had any doubt. A long fade out would have sat better with the sentiments of the song.

I really liked the sound of the synths and guitar so ignore me if you disagree.

Keith

[tboswell]

Liked it, especially the guitars in the back and the synth up from production. that really worked for me.

Most of the problems I hear are with the vocals. There places where vocals are badly timed or the double tracking slips that takes me out a bit. Also the reverb is very short (or not there) which is what I think causes the problems with the end of lines diademgrove mentioned.
Some carefully used echo and reverb would help.
There are some lines that drop so low behind the synth I can't make the words out (middle 8 I think).

I would change the melody at the end of the chorus, because it just stays on the same note at the end for quite a while. Makes it strangely unexpressive and fights with the lyrically meaning there I think.

Lots of like in it but some details tidied up would make it really shine.

Tom.

[Movin Flavour]

This track takes me back to my youth in the 80s.

Love the synths on the track.

The vocals have a haunting feel about them.

Reminds me of Japan/ Cure and bit of Bowie merged into one.

A great sound 

Sandeep

[tina m]

its shoegaze isnt it... all dreamy pop  long floppy fringes & of course shoes & umm ..gaze?
i liked it....i loved those long elastic guitar notes that stretch & stretch  ..i was waiting for one of them to go PING!
its very 1980s ....i was more human league than cocteau twins but i thought it was very well done & i do love gazing at shoes & of course buying them 

[Jamie]

Hi, I liked the feel and thrust of this song but there are issues with the production which I think you acknowledge. I think it would be worth pursuing this one and finishing it off.
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie

[Skub]

I hear lots of Pink Floyd influences going on here. The others have mentioned things they would change and that kinda covers it for me.

A thoroughly enjoyable listen richardyot.

How do you know an extroverted shoegazer?

He stares at the shoes of others.

[digger72]

Hi Richard,

I actually got a bit of Fergal Sharkey (minus the accent) during the chorus (especially on the song he did with Vince Clarke - Never Never).
Others have mentioned issues they had - i'll bow to their greater knowledge on technical things. I did notice the odd sound on some of the "Ts," but to be honest I got lost in the song - which I enjoyed a lot. I thought the mix of guitars and synths worked well. Perhaps the guitar could be a touch louder, and may be a touch more clarity in the overall mix?

I thought the lyrics and vocal were very good.

Great stuff.

Digger
 

[LostBoy]

Hey Richard,

We've known each other for over a year now and through listening to your songs every month I can say that this really is the best vocal I've heard from you.We are all steadily trying to get better at this songwriting malarchy and I know you work hard at it and it does show mate.Yes there's still some things that need polish...there's a weird bit 1.49-2.00 where the vocal sounds distorted or a bit loud?? But in terms of singing and getting some more character in that voice of yours I thought it was great!  I liked the lyrics a lot,they struck a chord with me and probably for a completely different reason than what you wrote them about...god,what an awful sentence!!! Anyhoo,the music was your usual high shoe gazing, weird mix techniqing standard! Yes that was a compliment! But what was the deal with that abrupt ending?? In the past we couldn't get you to end a song if we tried!! Haha! Anyway,nice work mate,nice to see/hear you on here. 

[crystalsuzy]

I totally enjoy listening to this kind of 'dreamy pop' stuff, Richard, and IMO, you've pulled it off well
the synth sounds are very cool and psychedelic, and gives it that PF atmospheric vibe 
Nice job on the vocals, and the lyrics are compelling 
The melody, especially the chorus, is very catchy
I thought the start, and the ending was a little abrupt, and there are a few production issues that
have already been mentioned, but with a little polish, I think you've got a really good song

[richardyot]

Thanks for the feedback, I am working on a new mix with some of the suggested changes in mind:

I am cutting out all the T sounds form the doubled vocals, and also running a DS-er on the vocal busses. I didn't realise that DS-ers could remove T sounds as well as S ones, but it turns out they can

I have re-recorded the second part of the second verse melody without the long notes, they just don't work there.

I am considering changing the ending to a fade, I quite like the abrupt ending but enough people have pointed it out as an issue that I am reconsidering.

I will try and post the new mix tomorrow, but in the meantime and I super-grateful for the feedback and the opportunity you've all given me to improve the track.

There is some reverb on the vocals, I am going to resist the urge to dial it up though because the usual crit I get is too much reverb. This is the first time ever I have been told there isn't enough

@lostboy thanks for the compliments on my singing. It's been a long road, 2 and a half years from strangled cat to here, but even my long-suffering wife now begrudgingly tells me I can sing I sit down with the acoustic guitar and sing a few songs every day, and I'm working on making my voice more expressive now that I've got the basics. Maybe another 20 years and I will be able to do Roy Orbison covers.

[pompeyjazz]

Liked it Richard, a real 80's feel. Reminded me of China Crisis, so that's no bad thing. Like the synths and is driven along well. Your vocals seem to be a little far away, maybe they could be a bit more up front. I love the oboe sounding riff BTW.

Nice work

John

[richardyot]

I've uploaded a new mix with most of the comments taken on board, including a fade out at the end. Thanks again for the feedback.

https://soundcloud.com/richardyot/doubt

[adamfarr]

I think I must have listened to the remix as I don't hear some of the things mentioned! Kudos for taking on board the suggestions.

I really like the chorus and vocals (probably the main things in a song like this). I thought the "it's not the thoughts" bridge section was a bit weaker but in some ways that's not a bad thing as when the chorus returns it comes back stronger.

I thought it lacked a little something in the top end - might not be what a song like this calls for all the way through but it felt a tiny bit flat. Perhaps just a mastering detail.

Good song!