[Tyler Hancock]

Hi, guys! Here's a song I actually wrote a couple years back but recently finished producing, called Heaven. This is a bit different from the kinds of songs I usually write. I thought it would be interesting to use the idea of heaven as a metaphor for sin/lust and to wrap it, sonically, in a slightly dark sounding r&b/pop production. I wanted to write a song that is both very sexual but not explicit. My long-term goal is to put together a full-length album within the next year and I'm considering including this track. I would love to get your opinions on both my lyrics and the music production. Can you easily interpret the underlying emotion of the song? Am I effectively communicating lyrically?

Lyrics:

[Verse 1]
You've got that kind of touch that makes me want more
The way you make me feel I've never felt before
Tonight I'm young and strong, don't hold back your power
Tonight the sky's the limit and the world is ours

[Pre-Chorus 1]
It's alright if you fall for me
Hold onto the mystery
Or look beyond the vanity

[Chorus]
I could be your drug, baby
I could make you high
You could be my murderer
Yeah, killing all my time
We could make it feel like heaven
When it's just you and I
So let me be your heaven, baby
Let me be your heaven

[Verse 2]
Come take my body like I'm good medication
I've got that paradise, sweet intoxication
You want to step into forbidden unknown
Don't be afraid 'cause you won't go it alone

[Pre-Chorus 2]
It's alright if you want to see
Everything that I could be
Live out every fantasy

[Chorus]

[Instrumental Solo]

[Bridge]
I could make you fall in love with me
It could be just a matter of time, oh
I could make you fall in love with me
But I'll let you take the lead
I know you want to be free

[KaelJay]

Hey Tyler!

This is a very interesting song, which is probably a new experience for me. It sounds like a song that could go mainstream. Personal preference, but you could've had your natural vocals. Rather than a computer-controlled filter or something. I'm not a fan of that thing.

Nice song!

Mikael

[diademgrove]

Hi Tyler,

reminds me of Justin Bieber. I'm not a big fan of his but recognise he has talent.

I'm not keen on the vocal treatment you use which puts me off a little. I like the backing track, very tasteful. I'd have liked a bit more power in the chorus though.

I wouldn't have ended on the bridge though. I was expecting another chorus. I can see why you did it but it didn't work for me.

Your message in the lyrics gets through and it was an interesting way of approaching the subject. The only problem I had with the lyrics was they sounded like you was doing the person a favour by sleeping with them. I found this did put up a big barrier to my really enjoying the song.

If you disagree please ignore my comments.

Keith

[Movin Flavour]

Definitely a song for the mainstream charts.

Great production.

As I was listening to the song, just felt that it stayed at the same level the whole time. I was waiting for the song to take off....

I think that the song has a lot of potential, but is not there yet.

Sandeep

[Viva La Stereo]

I don't listen to much of this kind of music, so my knowledge base is rather small. BUT, I think this is a great song. It's definitely something I could imagine hearing on the radio, for sure.

I really like the production, lots of layering going on there and it really works. I think the vocals are great, the effect you have on your voice works in my opinion.

I have nothing else to say, to be honest. I really like the song and I think theres a chance it's going to be popular

[MartynRich]

I find it hard to comment on this type of song just because of personal taste - not really my style at all. Saying that, I can recognise that you´ve put a lot of work into the production and I think the songcraft is there. It´s a modern song, the vocal effect is good (although not to everyone´s taste) and I did enjoy the instrumental. Common sense would say this is radio friendly but I envisage it more as an album track, albeit a good one. There is definitely a market for this song and you should go ahead promoting it...