[IronKnee]

Hi Everyone.....got this WIP, but it seems that I'm all out of ideas as to how to, musically, make this work. Any thoughts?.....anyone want to take this on?

“LET’S BLAME IT ON THE STARS”
     By Tom Tognaci

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13375679

You drifted your way
I just seemed to fall into my old ways
Who saw it coming?
I guess I should have seen it in your eyes
Like a light fading away….

I
I saw you last night
Sitting by the window, gazing the stars
Looking for answers?
Well, I’ve been searching for some of my own
Come on now baby
The moon said something we both should have known
‘Bout the stars and their fickle ways

Now, I don’t know what went wrong
But before you go on
Putting the blame on you and me…

…Let’s blame it on the stars
They never really were aligned just right
While we were gazing Mars
That’s when we should’ve spent that dime on a wishing well
That’s right, let’s blame it on the stars!


II
I heard you last night
Listening to the same old silly love songs
Who was that singing?
Crooning only he could light your fire
Come on now baby
Why are you listening to that old flat tire?
Spinning ‘round and around and ‘round

Now, I don’t know what went wrong
Sounds like the same old song
Putting the blame on you and me…

…Let’s blame it on the stars
From Willie and the Outlaws to George Jones
Not one we could call ours
They never wrote a song that we could call our own
That’s right, let’s blame it on the stars

Let’s blame it on the stars….(the sun and the moon)
Let’s blame it on the stars….(and where is ole George Jones?)
Let’s blame it on the stars….(Venus and Mars)
Let’s blame it on the stars…(and those honky-tonk bars)

[MartynRich]

I think the basic song is really there and wouldn't take much to make it work. I think you could maybe try varying the drums between verse and chorus to begin within, maybe leaving out the snare on the verse and bring it in for the chorus, giving the drums there a lot more in general (including ride cymbal). Put some backing harmonies on the chorus as well. Your wife for example, who is conspicuous by her absence

The break is in the right place, but you could just take it right down to almost a whisper and muted guitar, then use some rolling drums to bring in the next section, or maybe even build it up, bringing in an instrument at a time to bring it to a thunderous climax. You could also add low level layers of keyboards for some extra colour. It is really good though, I just think you need some variation in the arrangement.

GuyBarry is going to have your guts for garters for the line about Mars  

[IronKnee]

Thanks a lot Marty.........I'm looking for instrumental arrangements, and such. Piano pieces, Bass, and the like.  I'm actually looking to collab.
Thanks for all of your suggestions

Oh....and what did you mean with the Mars / GuyBarry comment   

                                          -Tom

[MartynRich]

It probably came across as too sarcastic (sorry Guy!) but the Mars line was grammatically incorrect and there has been a bit fo discussion about it...