[pompeyjazz]

I was watching "The Bridge" on Saturday night and there was a brilliant line ... "Have you got your ticket to the ghost train ?"

What a song title....

So my objective on Sunday was to see what I could knock out as an idea in one hour, no more..

It's pretty rough at the moment but would like to know if you guys think this idea works and it's worth following up (or not)

https://soundcloud.com/pompeyjazz/ticket-to-the-ghost-train

The lyrics for the chorus are...

Gonna get my hat
Gonna get my cane
Gonna get my cloak
Gonna get my ticket to the ghost train

Verses to be worked on

Many Thanks all

John / Pompeyjazz

[diademgrove]

Hi John,

the link doesn't work. Have you taken it down?

I like the chorus but I would substitute "buy" for the last "get" so you sing "gonna buy my ticket to the ghost train".

Looking forward to hearing the music.

Keith

[pompeyjazz]

Link Should be working now - Sorry !!!

[PaulAds]

i like this, John...sounds pretty well polished as it is...and it's another really interesting number from you...the keyboard sounds work really well, i reckon. well worth persevering with 

[olivergearing]

John,

You set yourself some really interesting challenges!!

This sounds very dark and interesting. The arpeggios are really nice between the chorus and verse.

I think you could lose the second "hat" from the second half of the chorus (unless it is a "ghost train hat"?)

I'm being transported back to the 80s, in a really good way!

[pompeyjazz]

Thanks for the feedback guys - Will definitely lose the second "hat" Oli 

Did another 30 mins on this last night and updated soundcloud. I think much more messing around with this might kill it somewhat. Just need to write some verse lyrics.

Cheers

John

[pompeyjazz]

New version uploaded. Hat is back in 

[den]

get on board
hold on tight
cant relax
cos its gonna be a fright night

ooops, sorry, just one of those songs once you hear it you cant help singing along, even if it hasn't got lyrics. cannot wait to hear this finished.
bloody brilliant.
regards den

[adamfarr]

For a couple of hours work this is superb already! (Where I am right now I seem to spend hours compressing and eq'ing everything to oblivion and then the next few hours decompressing and de-eq'ing to where it was originally. Hey ho.)

I think the 'Ghost train hat' while making no sense linguistically was a really satisfying turnaround musically. Can we bring it back in a way that works? How about adding a syllable and taking it over to the next line:

Gonna get my ticket to that old ghost
Train, gonna get my cloak
Gonna get my cane
Gonna get my ticket to the ghost train

Do you see what I mean? Just a thought that came to me while sweeping up the Autumn leaves....

Cheers!

[pompeyjazz]

Adam. I totally agree with you regarding production.  I have been down the same path as you re compression and eq. My (personal)  approach is to let the song do the talking. I don't personally want to be remotely associated with any mainstream crap
We all have our individual vibes long may it continue

[Paulski]

Hi John

Great hook - even if you don't want to do "mainstream" you still have a good hook and stay true to it.
I liked this - has a spooky groove (as a ghost train should). The vocals need a few touch-ups in places - or maybe just a shade too dry compared to the rest. The synths really add to the atmosphere. I'd say polish it up a bit more and call it cooked!

Paul

[pompeyjazz]

Thanks for all of your suggestion guys. I've just uploaded a new version with some tweaks and the addition of some suggested lyrics 

Cheers

John

[shadowfax]

Reckon your onto something with this..very 80's sound..if it's ok for Adele and that little blond singer, can't remember her name. she sings Touch me like you do..then it must be ok then..Eh!!

keep it simple is the trick with this I think..

best, Kevin

[pompeyjazz]

Thanks Kevin, Your feedback much appreciated as ever. I'm not going to do much more on this one apart from a little EQ work 

John