[habiTat]

Hello everyone,

I wrote this after having a really vivid dream, (sounds like a cliche' but its true), I thought maybe it might represent my whole, slightly obsessive approach to my music. Theres so much other stuff going on in everyday life, yet here's me, melodies and lyrics buzzing round my head..

Anyway, this is a really basic recording, I have plans to build the song as it progresses with piano, drums and some vocal harmonies, then keep it simple with vocal and guitar again at the end. If you've got any ideas or thoughts, they'd be greatly received. Just to bear in mind, this is very much a mid-album track (although will probably be the title track) and so is not intended as a 'single'.

http://soundcloud.com/habitatsongs/the-folly-edit1

[S.T.C]

To like this ,you`ve got to like this type of music...and i do.

Can`t give you any advice on what to do with it..but i would like to hear the finished song.

I wrote some lyrics a few years ago, which i`ve got some where called....Gav`re`al the giver of gold....think your the sort of musician that could play it...

[nooms]

hi hab
think this is interesting, stayed with it strong until about the 3 mins mark where i thought the section that follows it slowed it down and personally i would move on to the picking sequence at @4.50 and continue.
dont know if its crucial to the lyric as i cant catch them too well..

try and retain the loose feel, live drummer if poss
think keyboards, pads etc would colour it the wrong way,
i know bass is the obvious other but not sure it even needs that, somehow i can just hear slapping brushes and toms behind it, leaving it sparse ..

like your vocal and what you do with it, you sound very english yet the gtr especially as it picks up pace sounds ‘americana’ish, makes it interesting..

where it picks up at 1.53 a lone mexican trumpet would sound amazing but a real one not a casio..

forgive me my ramblings habitat im tripping on lemsip at the moment..
nooms

[habiTat]

Hi guys, thanks for the comments, and Nooms, I'll defintely consider your ideas, I really appreciate the time you've taken to listen and analyse this.

I forgot to include the lyrics initially, so here they are, that slower section is deliberately there to change the mood of the song, a kind of 'positive slant' to contrast the 'doubtful' section which preceeds it.

I had a dream and it is staying with me
A house without a door
Broken roof and nothing more
The red brick walls were without openings
It was tall and stood alone
Around the grasses had all grown
I wandered lonely round the ancient ruin
It softly spoke to me
And was swallowed by the trees
Now I wonder what it’s telling me
What it’s telling me

Is it something I'm better to forget
Haunted by the folly I might regret   

Am I wasting time
Looking for that rhyme
Is it something
I should leave behind
Oh oh oh


If I can enter
In the centre
A cornucopia
All that you ask for
You’ll never want for
Anything no more

Open up the windows
let the sun show
A fruitful melody
To give a life of plenty
Never empty
All for you and me


In that place there was a tranquil silence
As the rain began to fall
It was a dream and that was all
Now I lay there as I drift away
Hope that I return
See what else there is to learn
I know it was real and that it waits for me
But if I Get inside
Will it do, will it provide?
I think I know what it was telling me
What, it, was telling me.

[Schavuitje]

As an idea I thought this was really good. I'd agree with Nooms abut not adding too much to it.
Indeed the section at about 1:53 could do with somthing and Nooms idea is a really ineresting one.
The part where it drops at about 3:00 could maybe have bass and drums building it up and when
the singing starts again, have it a bit more powerful than it is at the moment. At the moment that middle part
sounds too forced into place as it is.
I think this is a great seed though and could be really ace 

[James Nighthawk]

Great start there

The upwards melodic rise in the chorus is dying for some building in the final version. Some electric guitar and vocal harmonies perhaps.

As it stands here isn't enough interest in the song to last the time. If you have plans for different tonal feels for each part you are onto a winner. Do play with vocal arrangements as they are a great simple yet powerful way to change up a song. But this will work in sections, some with full band, some stripped back.

Have fun with it

[jim morrison]

One of the best i've heard on here, you've a fantastic individual style, no criticism ,perfect

[cheff daniel]

very good i think. great melody in this song. something between country joe and leonard cohen. i think the strummed peace near the end is too long and too far from the rest, and i would leave that out, but overall a wonderful song.


gr.  Dan

[Boydie]

This is a great track and as usual the vocal is top notch

You really are developing a consistent style across your songs, which is a really good thing

I think it is really spooky but I was also thinking exactly the same as NOOMS regarding the lone mexico trumpet!

I can't really place why but the song really conjures up a "Spaghetti Western" feel for me

When the strumming picks up I can really here some clastanets, stamping etc.

I agree that some of the sections need more going on to keep the song moving but it is a great base on which to build and I am looking forward to see which direction you go!

[andy5544]

This is a lovely song , you sing really well .
i can imagine it building a bit then about half way completely letting rip with a full band ,  and some real juicy lead guitar , then pulling back near the end and a nice gentle finish. that would be feckin brilliant !!!!!!
by the way you sound like the singer with James .....

 

[joe gardner]

I enjoyed this song. i found it was a tad too long a lost its self in the middle a bit. I would love to hear the finished version of this song though.

Its got that old english sound to it, might just be your voice but i really like the vibe.

[habiTat]

Thanks for the comments and comparisons guys, I'm flattered

The mexican/latin comments are interesting, I never intended that but I did grow up with my dad playing flamenco guitar so maybe its rubbed off on me. I'm glad you think it should be kept quite loose as well, I had intended to keep it 'under produced' so I think this is the way to go. I can understand why it seems too long at the mo and I'm hoping thats because its in its raw state. With harmonies, piano and some drums (and maybe an interesting lead in the middle) I'm hoping it'll carry the listener along through different moods and almost tell like a story, therefore not boring anyone.

Thanks again

[andy5544]

Just been back for another listen , you have to put an all out rock section in the middle and just go crazy , it'd be great !!

[Dutchbeat]

sorry for my lack of advice, but is sounds cool to me
your high vocals are lovely!


and yes, you have your very own style

[faero]

Nice vocal sound...  and it fits the style well too

I actually really like this style - I'm also quite paraniod about gaps /open  sections in songs and there are a few bits where the music almost stops for a while.    i.e. even the most laid back structure usually has elements of verse/chorus.  I'm not saying this is right/wrong but it helps the whole thing have a bit more shape to it. 

That said - it moving it from all acoustic to full band would mean that the pauses could be filled with changes that keep the momentum up.  Carrying a song of this length on pure acoustic is extremely tough for sure.

Keep the nice high note parts - that catches attention and is memorable too.