The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Adam on June 19, 2012, 10:36:08 PM
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You have done a good job on this song. I would have like to have had the lyrics posted as it's much easier to comment on them if I can read them. Melody is great with very good seperation between verse and chorus. If I had a complaint it would be at times some of the vocal and the other instruments are drowned by the rhythym guitar. It seems it was left at a constant volume through the entire track when it might have been nice to see what it was like if it was pulled back for certain segments where there were other instruments or vocals to take on the mantle of the song.
Overall a real nice song and performed very well indeed. The guitar playing was most accomplished and the vocalist hit all the right notes and oozed character.
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good song... ;)
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Hey thanks guys! I'll go back to the mix and have a play around with the guitars. Here are the lyrics as requested:
Most evenings we drive around and watch the fuel gauge ticking down
Praying that its dark outside before the engine dies
Most of the time I’m barely here but now and then girl I could swear
I wake to find you frozen, asleep with your eyes open
This is nowhere calling
Static on the telephone line
A shimmer in the endless dark
A sudden burst of sound
This is nowhere calling
Out across the bittersweet night
To the broken and the fallen this is nowhere calling
I always knew you’d come around when all your heroes let you down
I kept myself ablaze just long enough to turn you blind
I can’t help feeling something’s wrong but shake it off and move along
But there’s a shadow in the distance
Rolling thunder in the distance
This is nowhere calling
Static on the telephone line
A shimmer in the endless dark
A sudden burst of sound
This is nowhere calling
Out across the bittersweet night
To the broken and the fallen this is nowhere calling
Kids parked up in midnight fields their headlights pointed at the trees
Golden sound from every stereo
It all seems so long ago now all those things we used to know
Got lost along the way in the slow parade of days
I heard on the evening news that there’s a cyclone blowing through
I’m breaking all the windows and I’m taking off the doors
So anything that’s not screwed down will get sucked up and hurled around
To smash down somewhere different
So everything looks different
This is nowhere calling
Static on the telephone line
A shimmer in the endless dark
A sudden burst of sound
This is nowhere calling
Out across the bittersweet night
To the broken and the fallen this is nowhere calling
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Excellent track....thought the harmonica worked well, you have a great voice. You are right to be really pleased with this.....I would be if I'd have written it ;D.....Loved it
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I'm not surprised you're pleased with that. Between the solid guitar playing, the power of the chorus and the bits of harmonica here and there it grabbed and kept my interest ... and demanded another couple of listens.
Very good song.
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wow I feel a lot better for having listened to that !!!! Melodic anthemic rock at its finest. Put me in mind of Wishbone Ash - but with good vocals and some extra oomph!!!! Love it - love love it!!! BTB
PS heading back for another listen.
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is this recorded at home or in a studio? i cant make my mind up
youve managed to get a great sound evrything is realy clear but still keeps a big live rock sound aswell
i think a lot of work has gone into making this sound so good & its a very strong rock song
your voice is great but is it normaly like that or is it pushed in the red a bit to get that raspy sound?
great stuff adam!
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Binladeda, atitlan, BTB: Thanks so much! Very very kind! Really is much appreciated!
Tina: Cheers! The music was recorded pretty much live. Some harmonica and guitar line overdubs. We have a little rehearsal space. We got tired of going into studios and watching money drain away as the clock ticked and then ending up with something we didn't like. So rather than book studios we decided to spend the money on some gear so that we wouldn't have to do that ever again. Now we can record as and when we want and take the time to get it how we want it to sound (for better or worse, haha). It was the best thing we ever did to be honest. It's just a matter of knowing the equipment. I've had my guitar rig for a long time now and I know it inside out, where the sweet spots are with the valve breakup and suchlike. Same goes for the other guys. As far as my voice goes, that is pretty much how it sounds. I sing pretty loud and I suppose I've learned over the years how to make that break up too. We do use a mastering guy though. It could be that you're hearing some light compression from him... :)
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great guitars and harmonica. that goes so well...voice is gritty, a tad nickelback in places.yeah this is wicked. productions leagues above mine. what a quality track. top stuff. hard to say anything bad about it.
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Hey Adam,
Great track. Chorus is deadly, 'static on the telephone line' - great line. Tapping my foot along to this before I knew it.
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Top notch ,class man (http://www.easyfreesmileys.com/smileys/hardrock-053.gif) (http://www.easyfreesmileys.com/facebook-smileys.html)loved the harmonica and guitar and vocals in fact everything . i'm going in for seconds ;D
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Thanks very much guys. Really is much appreciated!!!
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good tune i like this like, i dig the harmonica, cool!
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The harp is ace on this, good harmonica player
I find this kind of tempo in heavy guitar rock songs a bit, well, ploddy, but to your credit you do a great job with it. The changes of section are lovely. Drums are tight as hell, great playing all round in fact
I like the filtered vocal on the exit going just out of time
I found your last song to have more of a pull, but this one is more original, and two songs in its clear your band have a range which is ALWAYS promising.
The lyrics have a good character. I like the line Golden sound from every stereo. Simple but effective imagery.
Good stuff overall
(NB<< your mastering/producer guy did an ace job on the last track. On this one however there seems to be digital artefacts on the guitar and some of the heavier vocal lines from, most likely, harsh compression settings; especially if he mastered from a stereo wav file with preset levels from your off desk mix. I find I often have to reduce distorted guitar lines when mastering as the mastering algorithms I employ bring guitar up nicely without "distorting" in the bad way, whereas "at desk level" they square off against the drum, giving this square digital clipping.
Its shame as everything else about the sound is lovely. This might be the raspiness Tina is referring to. Alas it is "bad" sound.
Do check it hasn't appeared during the transition from master to mp3 or mp3 to upload on soundcloud though. If so it might just be a case of changing how you import and/or upload to streaming services. Those pesky variables!!)
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Common sense all the way through there, James. I have a genuine offer. Fancy remixing and remastering it? If so let me know the deal and we'll sort something out :)
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Common sense all the way through there, James. I have a genuine offer. Fancy remixing and remastering it? If so let me know the deal and we'll sort something out :)
I don't know if I'll get in trouble for monetising my account on this forum?! ??? ??? I have been very careful to keep this place apart from my worklife thus far :)
Alas, while lots of people on here do remixing/collab stuff with each other, for me production is a career so I am no position to offer freebies unfortunately. If you are serious, PM me with the details of the raw files you have from the project and we can take it from there.
Ace tune regardless :)
JN
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this is great, absoloooly
does all the right things for me
all the right buttons
makes me wanna play drums again..its a drummers dream playing this kind of track, can really put your back into it, dont know, dont care if the drums are programmed or not on this just felt really good
love the energy in it, just takes over,..wonderful stuff
dunno how i missed this
nooms
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..its a drummers dream playing this kind of track
Ooo. Good observation! Were this on "Rock Band" I would so put dibs on drums for this one!
(And yes, even musicians play Rock Band. Drunk. And piss off their mates by "Cheating", i.e. being able to sing lol!!! ;D ;D)
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james..
what does dibs mean ?
ok im getting it now..'rockbands' a game you rec biz types play ?
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I can't tell if you are kidding nooms? ;D
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I'm new here, just joined like a few mins ago and wanted to check out some of all your stuff...
AND WOW I AM AMAZED. This is just awesome!!! It's the first thing I heard from this forum and I am truly amazed because it sounds like a professional track already (or maybe you guys are professionals? idk sorry lol). You guys remind me of Nickelback too. And the lyrics are great btw :)
Sorry, can't give any constructive comments because I am really new to all this and yours is the first piece I've heard in here. But judging from the earlier comments, I'm not wrong to say it was great :)
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Yeah I got the Nickelback vibe too but damn that intro was Hooton 3 Car as FUCK. And those vocals man, top notch. 9/10 an excellent song
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that is great!!!! great chorus
ridiculously well recorded, and your vocals are really good
a pleasure to listen
reminds me of live, but better ;D,
and with harmonica :P
this could / should be on the radio
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Firstly, thanks so much for all your positive comments. They really are much appreciated I assure you. I'm pleased as punch that people actually took time to listen, let alone post such supportive and enthusiastic comments :)
I can't in honesty say that Nickelback features prominently in our record collections but, fair play, you've all called it like you heard it so no complaints from me :)
James: I did an A/B comparison between the original and uploaded versions of the song and the contrast is quite dramatic. The uploaded one is quite fizzy while the master sounds much fuller and more rounded.
Seriously folks, thanks so much once again!
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@Adam
Ah, so its a streaming/file compression issue
Read my (thorough) post here, it may be of help
http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/songwriters-resources/best-site-for-sound-quality/
If not might be the conversion to MP3 that is the issue, perhaps try a different program?
JN
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Bloody hell! THis has some kick to it. Such a great recording, it's sounds so professional! Anyway aside from that this track has so much going for it, great licks, catchy lyrics, passionate vocals, powerful punchy drums. This isn't even my sort of music usually but I can't help but love it. Wow!
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James: Yes I'm assuming it occurs at the 'transcoding' stage of the Soundcloud upload process since I just uploaded the full wav. There doesn't seem to be any way of adjusting the upload settings on Soundcloud...not to worry though, Soundcloud does the job fine...
Misswhiterabbit: Thanks very much for the kind words! Really much appreciated!
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Excellent clarity in the recording and an ace vocal
Maybe a little strained in the chorus if you want me to be picky
But broadcast ready ;)