The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Competitions => Topic started by: tina m on March 21, 2012, 06:15:38 PM
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i wrote this in february during FAWM ...in fact becos of the time consideration of 15 songs in 1 month most of what i wrote are short so i have plenty of choice for this competition! ;D
this is my fave tho!
http://www.soundclick.com/player/single_player.cfm?songid=11421629&q=hi
Baby I Vibrate
My dad
moved round a lot
My mum
preferred one spot
Just my luck
I inherited the lot
So I fidget
& vibrate on the spot
Baby I'm vibrating a lot
baby I dont think I can stop
I suppose you think that its hot
I can tell you honey its not
Men think
I'm good at sex,
my kids were
born nervous wrecks,
when I had them
they came out all shook up,
& bounced around the
labour ward on their butts
I need a man
with a good grip
in bed I fall
out quite a bit,
I wear out all my
clothes from the inside
& my belly button's
come untied
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;D that is bloody great - love the lyric - the pitch the speed - the sheer fun of it all. Forgive me - might have loved even more (if that was possible) if it just stopped - no fade. But that has really picked me up - thanks. BTB ;D ;D ;D
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i was typing a reply, but it got lost somewhere
i blame Tone for that ::)
anyway, you showed it is so very possible to have a very complete and great song
in 1.30
very good, Tinam
the battle is on!!!!!
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Ha ha! Brilliant! So well done, lyrics and everything.
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;D Brilliant! It's going to be hard to beat haha.
I too would have prefered it to just end. rather than fade but this is top notch ;D
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Fun song :D It's very Blondie!
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Great sound and lyric as you would expect, enjoyed it.
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i think we have a winner here. vrey blondie indeed, i love it.
gr. Dan
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Very Blondie. Very fun. Very cheeky way of moulding a short song - make it a fast song! More done in a shorter time! Huzzah!
Agree that a stop would trump a fade here. Perhaps you could end on the line "Baby I don't think I can stop!". A little lyrical irony to add to the fun!
;)
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Yeah, great little number & love the humour of it, nice one :) :)
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Ha ha
You know you really have spoilt me with all these sensitive compositions with Gerry - to the point i want to hear that kind of thing from you
But that doesn't take away from the fact that is very well written and recorded - infact it's supreme
Don't know if I would listen to it again and again though :o
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Hi tinam,
Great humour in the song lyrics. The first verse especially, is excellent. This is a very strong entry. the ending is a little abrupt but that is a small point. Well done!
Paul
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tinam
great track & vocal
bam and your off and the cats in the air
and that bass players away again...
all sounds so punchy and positive, songs so sorted youve even got time for a fade..
admire your lyrics, wordplay
fab
nooms
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thanks everyone for listening & the comments !
i thought i mightve had a winner here when i posted it but not at all confident now after hearing all the great entries so far :)
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this kicks ass!! And the lyrics are so fun and revelious! Love it!
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This is great. Meant to listen a long time ago. Glad I came back for it ;D Love the solo!!! Get on!!! Yeah love it. It is hot yes it is.
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pez youve made my day ..this is my kind of music & theres just not enuff people here who like this sort of thing so thankyou im realy pleased(http://www.pic4ever.com/images/4chsmu1.gif)
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Yep, very Blondie who I love. Would of been nice with a bridge to take it somewhere else and give the song a little variety and length. Really good though, well done!
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Great song!....great lyrics! fun for the ears!
;D ;D
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Don't know how I missed commenting on this one at short competition time. :P ??? :'(
I should have commented on it because it's the usual high quality from I expect from DBG, but especially on this one... the bass. Wonderful runs up the fretboard without being self indulgent.
Sorry my crit took so long! :o
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well i didnt expect to find this getting more listens long after the event but thankyou all i glad you liked it :)
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would give this a listen like if only soundclick worked on me ipad!!
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managed to get this to play on me ipad! short and sweet and quirky like! good stuff bit like blondie like, good listen!