The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: moraamarolaloba on July 04, 2022, 12:43:39 PM
-
Hola!!! I upe you are having a nice time there!!! Here we are being cooked over a slow fire... But the light of summer and the mixed smells generated by heat are wonderful!
I think this song has summer colors and happy sound, tell me please what do you think!!!
Thank you!
Mora
maybe
when night and day are already company
loneliness becomes a visit that does not bother
and the lights and the shadows
are surrealist painters of life
maybe
I'm already a drawer of yesterday
in which others look for memories
Maybe
those strange birds
that turn into wisps of black smoke
as they come out of my mouth,
are the silent cry of my thought,
barren as a soundless instrument
Maybe Maybe Maybe
Maybe
everything has a meaning beyond this side
everything is maybe right now
a moment that more than a moment
is a sea of ​​questions
Maybe Maybe Maybe
maybe I am the reins of my life
but where are my hands?
-
Super arrangement instrumentally, the tune felt a little forced and maybe a more narrative approach would have worked better, nevertheless your originality is boundless.
-
Super arrangement instrumentally, the tune felt a little forced and maybe a more narrative approach would have worked better, nevertheless your originality is boundless.
Hola @shadowfax (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20024)
Thank you for your comment!!!
Stay well there
Mora
-
Hey Mora, I really like the bassy notes that open this... they sound almost out of tune (in a good way... a little disconcerting and therefore atmospheric). Love some of the surreal imagery in your lyrics here too ... the strange birds turning into wisps of smoke - that's great. I don't know what it signifies, but it is still great. And the title is wonderfully odd too... what an intriguing question to ask.
-
Hey Mora, I really like the bassy notes that open this... they sound almost out of tune (in a good way... a little disconcerting and therefore atmospheric). Love some of the surreal imagery in your lyrics here too ... the strange birds turning into wisps of smoke - that's great. I don't know what it signifies, but it is still great. And the title is wonderfully odd too... what an intriguing question to ask.
Hola @PaulyX (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21034)
Thank you!!!
Those times when you wanted to explain something but the words were not what you wanted to say and the message is lost, like smoke... Well, nonsense of that hahaha
Stay well
Mora
-
Love this:
maybe
I'm already a drawer of yesterday
in which others look for memories
Very clever..
Some great stuff going on in the arrangement / production - that panning is fab! And the flutey synth sound (I hope you know what I mean) is fantastic. Beats are also great..
As always, it's the mood and atmosphere that shines here..
Wonderful stuff, @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) !!
K
-
Love this:
maybe
I'm already a drawer of yesterday
in which others look for memories
Very clever..
Some great stuff going on in the arrangement / production - that panning is fab! And the flutey synth sound (I hope you know what I mean) is fantastic. Beats are also great..
As always, it's the mood and atmosphere that shines here..
Wonderful stuff, @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) !!
K
Hola @MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820)
Thank you!!! Sure you are having a good summer!!
Mora
-
Hi Mora.
A bright,sunny,happy tune. I'm sitting in the sun listening and it's a perfect match.
-
Hi Mora.
A bright,sunny,happy tune. I'm sitting in the sun listening and it's a perfect match.
Wow!!! You are having a wonderful time there!!! Thank you very much nd stay enjoying !
Mora
-
Hi @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) Yes, summer colours and happy sounds for sure. This is quite avant garde with all of the different synth sounds like you use and the the unusual rhythm pattern. I liked some of the clever effects on the vocals processing - Excellent stuff :)
-
Hi @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) Yes, summer colours and happy sounds for sure. This is quite avant garde with all of the different synth sounds like you use and the the unusual rhythm pattern. I liked some of the clever effects on the vocals processing - Excellent stuff :)
Hi @pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269)
Thank you!!!
Mora
-
Awesome intro! I stopped the melody and listened to the intro several times.
An interesting song with a beautiful arrangement.
You are my inspiration! :) :) :)
Maya
-
Awesome intro! I stopped the melody and listened to the intro several times.
An interesting song with a beautiful arrangement.
You are my inspiration! :) :) :)
Maya
Hola @Maya Clars (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22624)
Thank you so much!!!
Big kiss and have a nice weekend!!